A really embarrassing question

[Proshat]

Greetings Zevist brothers and sisters
I have an embarrassing question about love and I hope no one takes this personal or try to make it political or chaotic or gender war
I can't ask anyone else this question because I need a religious perspective on this not personal opinions.
I don't want to sin.


I love both men and women.
By this I don't mean I love all men and all women and I'm a 304,I mean I sometimes love a man and then I forget about him and start loving a woman and vice versa.
I never tell them and try to forget and move on.

I also have serious plan to one day become a mother if God is willing to give me that chance.
My concern is how will I stop wanting a child if I love a woman?
Most of the times I love a girl and it's so rare for me to love a boy.
It's not like I choose people I love based on their gender.
I have almost destroyed my social life with girls because I always end up loving one of my friends so I just don't hang out with them too much.

Why does this chaos exist and how am I going to deal with this situation?
I understand that adopting children is wrong if one is married to a same sex person but I can get pregnant myself and all women could get pregnant,we don't need adoption,we have wombs.

I also won't be able to guess my next love's gender so if I get pregnant with the wrong person and then fall in love with a girl what will I do?

I don't want to be this way and there's no cure for this I have tried everything.
I was like this since I was 4!

I even have thought of completely forgetting about love and marriage and children altogether.

 

[DarkPagan666]

You are simply experiencing a human need for connection, love, and meaning. This isn't a "defect" in you, it's part of how human beings are created; to love, to form bonds, and to dream of things like family and care for others.

If you are a woman and lean more towards women, and wanting to be with a woman, it is best for you not to have children. A child or children should have an upbringing with both a father and a mother.

The chaos you feel is your soul seeking completion by seeking to heal or fulfill old, unresolved connections. You may carry what is called Samskaras (deep impressions) of relationships from past incarnations, some with men, some with women, and those emotional patterns are still echoing inside you. This needs to be addressed.

The above can be addressed by Freeing the Soul, gradually cleaning and purifying your chakras, and seeking consolidation with Zeus, your GD, and our Gods. You can combine the Grand Ritual of Zeus with a Purification Working, which many of us have done and found to bring great results. Hatha and Kundalini Yoga will help tear down walls in the mind, which will make things clearer for you. Though this may take some time, but it sure will bring immense rewards, greater self-knowledge, spiritual strength, and true freedom of the heart.

 

[Ol argedco luciftias]

If you are attracted to both men and women, maybe it is just more common for there to be women who have the type of personality traits that match you better. You can find a high quality man with the correct type of personality and be attracted to him.

Not everybody is required to have children. But at the same time, our people are facing a purposeful planned extinction. It is important for the people who are meant to be parents to be in the situation where they can have children. And if you have a need in your soul to be a mother, this is something that you will never forgive yourself for if you end up never having children.

Try to find a high quality man who is a perfect match for you, and have a family. This is what would most likely be the best thing for you.

 

[Proshat]

If you are attracted to both men and women, maybe it is just more common for there to be women who have the type of personality traits that match you better. You can find a high quality man with the correct type of personality and be attracted to him.

Not everybody is required to have children. But at the same time, our people are facing a purposeful planned extinction. It is important for the people who are meant to be parents to be in the situation where they can have children. And if you have a need in your soul to be a mother, this is something that you will never forgive yourself for if you end up never having children.

Try to find a high quality man who is a perfect match for you, and have a family. This is what would most likely be the best thing for you.

Thank you.

My concern is that I can’t predict or control who I’m going to like—there’s no way to foresee this.

I also need to have at least one child.

Most women who are attracted to both genders also want children based on my experience.

Is it because the ability to give birth inherently makes someone desire children?

 

[Epiphany]

Thank you.

My concern is that I can’t predict or control who I’m going to like—there’s no way to foresee this.

I also need to have at least one child.

Most women who are attracted to both genders also want children based on my experience.

Is it because the ability to give birth inherently makes someone desire children?

What I wonder is if you have hangups here, around men or relationships, because I remember that you went on a bit of a feminist crusade in another thread complaining about men.

You say that it's rare that you love a man. I question whether it is really a man that you love or certain, possibly feminine traits in him, because it seems either your natural inclination is to be a lesbian and you could have a masculine energy that yearns for the feminine, which is rare in men and often not expressed harmoniously.

It's okay to be a lesbian if this is truly who you are, you shouldn't feel pressured to be someone you're not if you don't truly want to pair with a man and have a family. I understand that there can be a social pressure on you as a woman for this. Just look within and try to figure out if there are any hangups or programming that is getting between you and the life you really want. Check your natal chart to see if there is any karma here.

If raising a family of your own is not in the cards then you can care for your people in other ways.

For your worries about "sinning", please study the ethics of the Gods. The link is in my signature. Here are some of the relevant ones:

Life Ethics - Sexual Ethics I

Life Ethics - Marriage IV

Life Ethics - Procreation V

Life Ethics - Children VI

 

[Ol argedco luciftias]

Thank you.

My concern is that I can’t predict or control who I’m going to like—there’s no way to foresee this.

I also need to have at least one child.

Most women who are attracted to both genders also want children based on my experience.

Is it because the ability to give birth inherently makes someone desire children?

Being able to give birth is not what makes you want to have children. You have probably had children in all of your previous lifetimes, or at least most of them. So being a mother is just an absolutely strong and important part of your soul. Being a parent is usually the most important and significant factor in a person's life, so after multiple lifetimes of being a parent, it becomes a very large part of who you are and who you are meant to be. I mean who you are meant to be from internally within your own soul, not from any external pressures. Very similar situation to how important it is for most people to be married to someone, because most people have been married in all or most of previous lifetimes. So it becomes a very large part of your soul's karmic forces to continue to exist with this type of relationship.

 

[Ol argedco luciftias]

What I wonder is if you have hangups here, around men or relationships, because I remember that you went on a bit of a feminist crusade in another thread complaining about men.

You say that it's rare that you love a man. I question whether it is really a man that you love or certain, possibly feminine traits in him, because it seems either your natural inclination is to be a lesbian and you could have a masculine energy that yearns for the feminine, which is rare in men and often not expressed harmoniously.

It's okay to be a lesbian if this is truly who you are, you shouldn't feel pressured to be someone you're not if you don't truly want to pair with a man and have a family. I understand that there can be a social pressure on you as a woman for this. Just look within and try to figure out if there are any hangups or programming that is getting between you and the life you really want. Check your natal chart to see if there is any karma here.

If raising a family of your own is not in the cards then you can care for your people in other ways.

For your worries about "sinning", please study the ethics of the Gods. The link is in my signature. Here are some of the relevant ones:

Life Ethics - Sexual Ethics I

Life Ethics - Marriage IV

Life Ethics - Procreation V

Life Ethics - Children VI

The feminist type of ideas that she said in the other topic were valid and valuable. And the anti-feminist ideas of the other people responding to her were also mostly valid and valuable. Nobody said anything in that topic that was not often correct in many situations, and from both sides of the arguments, what was said were things that are commonly true. It was a discussion largely about propaganda, influences, intentions, and forces, and it is true that there are forces and influences from multiple different directions.

An example is that it is true that young women are faced with a lot of negative propaganda and psychic influences intended to harm them and intended to convince them to harm themselves, and it is also true that they should not listen to these forces and instead should care more about doing what they know is actually best for themselves. It was true when she said that young women are targeted with powerful energetic forces and propaganda telling them exactly how they are supposed to look and usually in a way that is unhealthy and harmful, and it is also true what the other guy said that most of those messages are not coming from men and are not really what most men are attracted to anyway. We are in a world where for more than a thousand years, jews and criminals and evil people have been trying to destroy and extinct humanity in every possible way, and by creating every possible psychic, emotional, propaganda, and societal problems.

Both men and women are targeted every day with curses that are attempting to destroy us. It is not the young women's fault for being emotionally harmed by these forces, and it is not the young men's fault for also being emotionally harmed by these forces. All we can do is to try to be strong and keep trying to work towards building the lives that we truly want for ourselves.

 

[Epiphany]

The feminist type of ideas that she said in the other topic were valid and valuable. And the anti-feminist ideas of the other people responding to her were also mostly valid and valuable. Nobody said anything in that topic that was not often correct in many situations, and from both sides of the arguments, what was said were things that are commonly true. It was a discussion largely about propaganda, influences, intentions, and forces, and it is true that there are forces and influences from multiple different directions.

An example is that it is true that young women are faced with a lot of negative propaganda and psychic influences intended to harm them and intended to convince them to harm themselves, and it is also true that they should not listen to these forces and instead should care more about doing what they know is actually best for themselves. It was true when she said that young women are targeted with powerful energetic forces and propaganda telling them exactly how they are supposed to look and usually in a way that is unhealthy and harmful, and it is also true what the other guy said that most of those messages are not coming from men and are not really what most men are attracted to anyway. We are in a world where for more than a thousand years, jews and criminals and evil people have been trying to destroy and extinct humanity in every possible way, and by creating every possible psychic, emotional, propaganda, and societal problems.

Both men and women are targeted every day with curses that are attempting to destroy us. It is not the young women's fault for being emotionally harmed by these forces, and it is not the young men's fault for also being emotionally harmed by these forces. All we can do is to try to be strong and keep trying to work towards building the lives that we truly want for ourselves.

Yes, there are merits all around, but this reply is irrelevant to the points I'm making. If you want to debate these topics again then you can go back to the other thread and talk about them. It's a tired conversation and I have no interest in it so don't involve me in it.

 

[Ĥl·lĥæ]

You can have children without dating.
But in your case, family is important, right?
So it's going to be tricky because you might like a guy and then completely lose your passion for him.
Be taken by another woman; or another man.
An emotional change like water.

 

[Proshat]

What I wonder is if you have hangups here, around men or relationships, because I remember that you went on a bit of a feminist crusade in another thread complaining about men.

You say that it's rare that you love a man. I question whether it is really a man that you love or certain, possibly feminine traits in him, because it seems either your natural inclination is to be a lesbian and you could have a masculine energy that yearns for the feminine, which is rare in men and often not expressed harmoniously.

It's okay to be a lesbian if this is truly who you are, you shouldn't feel pressured to be someone you're not if you don't truly want to pair with a man and have a family. I understand that there can be a social pressure on you as a woman for this. Just look within and try to figure out if there are any hangups or programming that is getting between you and the life you really want. Check your natal chart to see if there is any karma here.

If raising a family of your own is not in the cards then you can care for your people in other ways.

For your worries about "sinning", please study the ethics of the Gods. The link is in my signature. Here are some of the relevant ones:

Life Ethics - Sexual Ethics I

Life Ethics - Marriage IV

Life Ethics - Procreation V

Life Ethics - Children VI

Thank you
I'm going to explain some things because I don't want anyone to be upset about my previous posts
I actually do like men too.
I'm not anti man
I do hang up with men too and they really don't have any problems with me.(Not stranger men, mostly people I know like my classmates and relatives)
I'm actually so nice with them that they sometimes think I'm doing it for other reasons but I am just nice to people.
The reason I act feminist is because I'm gender blind most of the times(I love most people despite their gender because they are human beings) and I feel like anyone mentioning gender roles and differences is creating division.
This doesn't mean I think you were doing the same thing I just think people who mention gender a lot are creating division(again I don't mean you or any Zevists were doing this on purpose)

I act the same when I'm with feminist girls but you won't see that because you are not there.

There was this girl saying men deserve to get drafted because they are given more privilege in our law(our country is anti woman and I'm sure if I tell you where I live you would agree),I told her that she is being stupid because men didn't choose to be born here and under these laws and they are like us.They didn't choose anything.
I was called a pick me and so many other names for it.

I also don't deny that I get really upset when I feel people are being unfair to women.I sometimes get really upset and angry because I'm trying my best to not be evil against men and other people.

I'm not lesbian and I most of the times don't use modern day titles for myself.
I have loved men and women before.

I don't feel attracted to women who act like men and men who act like women(I respect them but don't feel attracted to them).

Men around me pressure themselves too much because they are men and this upsets me so much.
They don't let women work because they think we would be tired.

This causes so much problems because I personally want to be able to spend money without telling my parents about where I want to spend it.
I haven't been able to donate because of this issue.
I don't have a credit card because they don't think I need it.
It doesn't matter if they are rich or poor or average because I still won't be able to do what I want since I have to explain to them and do it with their credit cards.
If I tell them I need some privacy they will automatically think I'm going to be in a relationship without telling them(They don't think I'm old enough for a serious relationship, it's common where I live).
I love my parents so much and I know they love me so much too but this is wrong.
Don't think bad about my parents,they are like everyone else and it's just a bad culture.They don't know better.

Some men pressure themselves and then it results in pressuring women around them for no reason but they think they are helping women.
This is why I hate gender roles and traditions.They are misleading and make people blind.
People end up wronging other people thinking they are helping them out

 

[Proshat]

You can have children without dating.
But in your case, family is important, right?
So it's going to be tricky because you might like a guy and then completely lose your passion for him.
Be taken by another woman; or another man.
An emotional change like water.

That's exactly what I fear the most

 

[Ĥl·lĥæ]

That's exactly what I fear the most

Work with constant energy.
Try to create a straight and fixed line in your emotions.
Perhaps earth energy will help

 

[Epiphany]

Thank you
I'm going to explain some things because I don't want anyone to be upset about my previous posts
I actually do like men too.
I'm not anti man
I do hang up with men too and they really don't have any problems with me.(Not stranger men, mostly people I know like my classmates and relatives)
I'm actually so nice with them that they sometimes think I'm doing it for other reasons but I am just nice to people.
The reason I act feminist is because I'm gender blind most of the times(I love most people despite their gender because they are human beings) and I feel like anyone mentioning gender roles and differences is creating division.
This doesn't mean I think you were doing the same thing I just think people who mention gender a lot are creating division(again I don't mean you or any Zevists were doing this on purpose)

I act the same when I'm with feminist girls but you won't see that because you are not there.

There was this girl saying men deserve to get drafted because they are given more privilege in our law(our country is anti woman and I'm sure if I tell you where I live you would agree),I told her that she is being stupid because men didn't choose to be born here and under these laws and they are like us.They didn't choose anything.
I was called a pick me and so many other names for it.

I also don't deny that I get really upset when I feel people are being unfair to women.I sometimes get really upset and angry because I'm trying my best to not be evil against men and other people.

I'm not lesbian and I most of the times don't use modern day titles for myself.
I have loved men and women before.

I don't feel attracted to women who act like men and men who act like women(I respect them but don't feel attracted to them).

Men around me pressure themselves too much because they are men and this upsets me so much.
They don't let women work because they think we would be tired.

This causes so much problems because I personally want to be able to spend money without telling my parents about where I want to spend it.
I haven't been able to donate because of this issue.
I don't have a credit card because they don't think I need it.
It doesn't matter if they are rich or poor or average because I still won't be able to do what I want since I have to explain to them and do it with their credit cards.
If I tell them I need some privacy they will automatically think I'm going to be in a relationship without telling them(They don't think I'm old enough for a serious relationship, it's common where I live).
I love my parents so much and I know they love me so much too but this is wrong.
Don't think bad about my parents,they are like everyone else and it's just a bad culture.They don't know better.

Some men pressure themselves and then it results in pressuring women around them for no reason but they think they are helping women.
This is why I hate gender roles and traditions.They are misleading and make people blind.
People end up wronging other people thinking they are helping them out

Thank you for sharing. I'm not upset, because I considered why you likely said certain things in certain ways at the time. At the time it was abrasive, but it's in the past and the intellectual content of it isn't my concern and isn't why I brought it up.

The way some of what you said back then sounded to me was that you were bitter towards men as a whole and held some bitter sentiments, which is what lead me to prompt you about hangups relating to men here. If it wasn't for you also saying here that it's rare for you to fall in love with men and usually you pursue women, I would have had a different approach.

Your name sounds indian to me and I hear about alot of mistreatment of women there so some latent anger and bitterness is understandable. In general, treatment of women is not very fair in developing countries.

Your views will develop over time and you will find your center, just keep studying, read the forum and do your own research, keep an open mind. I consider myself fortunate in a way because I've always been an individual, beyond things like my race and my nation. I never considered myself part of a "group", because groups are politicized and manipulated.

The circus of identity politics today is based on group identification. It shuts off peoples' ability to think and reason by putting them in an emotional state when they feel that their "tribe" is under attack. People are also reluctant to diverge from the tribe's "code" and identity, even if doing so will put them on a better life path or bring them closer to truth. This mechanism has a natural purpose but it can be used in a dysfunctional way.

It's not the thing identified with in itself that does this, but the people who choose to make it their identity. They are unable to separate themselves, their ego, from the thing identified with.

With some topics, this is hard to avoid, because of their personal nature.

Anyway, I hope you consider what I said and that it helps you somehow.

 

[Blitzkreig [TG]]

Thank you.

My concern is that I can’t predict or control who I’m going to like—there’s no way to foresee this.

I also need to have at least one child.

Most women who are attracted to both genders also want children based on my experience.

Is it because the ability to give birth inherently makes someone desire children?

The more fun and masculine/projected side of love is ruled by the Sun and the 5th house. Karma attached to these areas can create problems with men, desires, and children (which are our creations), among other things.

Due to the negative events which had happened to you, it is normal to feel like the situation is out of control, but it does not have to be this way. In fact, our solar side rules over power over the environment and self-mastery, so this can give an additional layer of feeling powerless.

There is also an element of shame here which appears to prevent you from expressing yourself properly. It appears like you want to like the man and have a kid, but feel guilt that your desire is pulled elsewhere. This situation of wanting one thing, but feeling like you cannot have it, likely worsens any feelings of being out of control.

Thinking you must abandon childbirth or marriage altogether is itself a sign of low confidence, like you cannot or are unable to get what you want out of it.
Similarly, thinking that your desires are unpredictable actually devalues the meaning behind what you like and what you can create. Even if the true potential is not fully realized yet, it is still a real aspect of your soul that deserves to be met, not bent in two ways and forced to compromise.

----------------------

First, it is always possible to spiritually advance and build a "path" out of this. For example, this may look like a situation where either you no longer feel that you must have a kid, and the desire for this is transmuted into another creative endeavor in a fulfilling way.

Option 2 could be that you find in a male partner whatever feminine traits turn you on, therefore you feel fulfilled by him totally and don't have a need to leave.

Option 3 could even be an open relationship situation, where you are married to a man, but he supports you having a female lover.

Whatever path is most viable depends on your own soul and what is most realistic to achieve through spiritual means. It is hard for us to say with much certainty what the best result would be, because we cannot see the totality of your soul.

You should talk to your GD or Astarte about this. Be open to changes, which can be achieved in a true and healthy way. Then, you can plan some workings for this, as well as accompanying Gods' Rituals, and then you will have a solid plan to get results on this problem.

 

[Proshat]

The more fun and masculine/projected side of love is ruled by the Sun and the 5th house. Karma attached to these areas can create problems with men, desires, and children (which are our creations), among other things.

Due to the negative events which had happened to you, it is normal to feel like the situation is out of control, but it does not have to be this way. In fact, our solar side rules over power over the environment and self-mastery, so this can give an additional layer of feeling powerless.

There is also an element of shame here which appears to prevent you from expressing yourself properly. It appears like you want to like the man and have a kid, but feel guilt that your desire is pulled elsewhere. This situation of wanting one thing, but feeling like you cannot have it, likely worsens any feelings of being out of control.

Thinking you must abandon childbirth or marriage altogether is itself a sign of low confidence, like you cannot or are unable to get what you want out of it.
Similarly, thinking that your desires are unpredictable actually devalues the meaning behind what you like and what you can create. Even if the true potential is not fully realized yet, it is still a real aspect of your soul that deserves to be met, not bent in two ways and forced to compromise.

----------------------

First, it is always possible to spiritually advance and build a "path" out of this. For example, this may look like a situation where either you no longer feel that you must have a kid, and the desire for this is transmuted into another creative endeavor in a fulfilling way.

Option 2 could be that you find in a male partner whatever feminine traits turn you on, therefore you feel fulfilled by him totally and don't have a need to leave.

Option 3 could even be an open relationship situation, where you are married to a man, but he supports you having a female lover.

Whatever path is most viable depends on your own soul and what is most realistic to achieve through spiritual means. It is hard for us to say with much certainty what the best result would be, because we cannot see the totality of your soul.

You should talk to your GD or Astarte about this. Be open to changes, which can be achieved in a true and healthy way. Then, you can plan some workings for this, as well as accompanying Gods' Rituals, and then you will have a solid plan to get results on this problem.

Thank you TG