AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
Promised not to use drugs anymore - used.
Promised to go to work if there was something suitable - didn't go. (just couldn't bring myself to do it after realizing what it was like)
And a lot of other little things that reflect the weakness of my personality. (Sometimes I even have thoughts that it's too hard for me to be a human and I would love to become some lower level spirit where everything is easier, or just cease to exist so as not to bother anyone). (I never cheated with that intent, I just didn't have the mental strength to keep my word)
If I try to evolve, do rituals, meditate. But inside, I would not say that anything changes, apparently it's my nature, or lack of training/education earlier in life.
This way is not for me and I will not get any help from Satan and gods, because they will not see the benefits of investing in such resources?
Everything that has been good in my life - in one way or another relates to luck, not to achieving a goal systematically and exerting force.
Girls, money, friends - everything just came by itself.
Now I'm going through a more difficult period in my life, I'm asking for help, but deep down by “help” I mean getting lucky again. I just don't know how to live differently and no one taught me, for me it's like a mockery like forcing a square to fit through a hole for a circle.
Promised to go to work if there was something suitable - didn't go. (just couldn't bring myself to do it after realizing what it was like)
And a lot of other little things that reflect the weakness of my personality. (Sometimes I even have thoughts that it's too hard for me to be a human and I would love to become some lower level spirit where everything is easier, or just cease to exist so as not to bother anyone). (I never cheated with that intent, I just didn't have the mental strength to keep my word)
If I try to evolve, do rituals, meditate. But inside, I would not say that anything changes, apparently it's my nature, or lack of training/education earlier in life.
This way is not for me and I will not get any help from Satan and gods, because they will not see the benefits of investing in such resources?
Everything that has been good in my life - in one way or another relates to luck, not to achieving a goal systematically and exerting force.
Girls, money, friends - everything just came by itself.
Now I'm going through a more difficult period in my life, I'm asking for help, but deep down by “help” I mean getting lucky again. I just don't know how to live differently and no one taught me, for me it's like a mockery like forcing a square to fit through a hole for a circle.