But what is that you want to know. You've asked about how to mend your error , it seems like it's already amended as you have no more fear and feel the connection again so then what is the problem if truly within yourself you are good then isn't this validation you seeking which will serve to nothing more then a waste of everyone's time. If you do have a question ask but from my sight I can see that you're awaken and on your path, continue meditating and advancing , all is good.