luis said:
I'm a bit confused about something, it's some days now that I feel different. I always knew that I'm gay and I accepted it a long time ago, the problem know is that I feel attraction with girls too :shock: It's so weird I do not know how this is possible, I have to say that I never had sex, in general, let alone with a girl and I'm not a teen, I'm on my twenties, so I honestly do not know how this is possible any idea? Is it because of cleaning? This is so weird...
I struggled with that all my life. Sometimes your sexuality flips. Like Bi people are straight a couple months then gay a couple months.
When I started doing munka, I felt really straight. Then if I looked at porn, I would watch the Guy. I would strain to keep concentration on the female.
Then the arousal would just shut off. I would think they look hot but my brain would do nothing. Then I would look at guys, and my brain would explode. I would find release.
I use to be attracted to ultra feminine guys. But your taste actually changes as you get older. More and more I like older and masculine.
I use to like really skinny. Now I like muscular. But I really like the clean shaven pretty boy face. I like the greek god bodies. Lol
I think it has to do with your current lvl of masculinity. You want what's more feminine then you. I was very skinny and what not. Now I've gotten alot more muscle and masculine.
The problem is once guys hit about 30 they look like shit. Because no one takes care of themselves. Luckily being that I've meditated since a teenager, most early 20s think I'm their age.
I cant even tell the truth. They are like no your not. Stop lying. So I'm like ok gosh you know you caught me, I'm 21. Ha! I knew it!
Lol! Works for me. But the problem is I cant stand the mentality of these kids anymore. Especially the newer generations. What is there to interact with?
So it's like pick up some brainless fuck toy or try to have a decent relationship with some fat out of shape guy that eats cheetos all day.
I think I'm going to take Cobras advice and ask for an Incubus. Because at this point I dont see any other option. Get to know him more and more and then in 20 years meet him in person. That's not a bad deal.
Also I cannot stand guys that show any trace of being gay. I like GUYS. Not that horrible whine in their voice shit. I do not flame in anyway. I've also met guys that do not.
My idea of gay is like Naked Spartan Male greek Bodies. Working in the field or training for battle. With an orgy at night. This use to be the norm. Even ones who were more 90 percent straight, would be like yeah why not.
Just look at the prisons. They demonstrate Paganism in modern form. Everyone sticks to their own race and even the most masculine brute has a boy friend. Well take an army that lives on the battlefield with no females around. That happens in today's military.
First of all the really hot in shape gays are there. But second, my friend went to Iran, he said after several months, he noticed he was looking at guys asses. One guy pinned him against a wall and came onto him. After intense kissing the guy let him go and apologized. The guy being like 6 foot 3 260 pounds of muscle.
He was like he could have man handled me and raped me lol. While I didnt want that too happen, I realized I didnt mind the attention he gave me.
That was a couple months, imagine being there 3 years.
So yeah dont worry about it. It's perfectly normal. All guys go through it at some point, no matter how much they try and deny it. Especially when younger.