The expecation of love

[sinbad]

I'm not sure if there's something wrong with my love nature or not, however I don't really have a problem with it unless it's something that's "meant" to be fixed (e.g., prevent's the kundalini from being raised).

I've come to realise my definition of love is also different from other's. All this time I assumed it was synonymous with "connection".

I don't think men/women love in the same way generally, but I've never had the thought of receiving love from another person... I've only thought about receiving their respect and admiration, sexual desire towards me, and their affection/nurturing qualities, but not "unconditional love" which is something that seem's unrealistic and pointless to me.

I want companionship with a mentally, emotionally and sexually stimulating partner, and although I do care very deeply about those close to me, it's mostly in a detached way.

A "playmate", if you will.

Women have responded well to me for most of my life, at least on the short term, but I'm wondering am I missing out on something by not caring about deep love. I enjoy romance, but again, it's just sort of a playful dance/game to me, and not this passionate enmeshment that other's have and enjoy.

I don't really care about love, or know what it is, nor what to do with it if I did receive it anyway, but not in a pessimistic way. It's just my default mode. I have a really high sex drive though, and definitely seek out romance, so it's kind of weird dynamic.

I like to "play" (seduce) my partner's like a musical instrument and watch them react to me. I like to admire their positive qualities and be charmed by their conversation/humour, style/beauty etc.

But there is something missing I feel. I want it to be passionate, and yet retain that feeling of it being a game. But I grow bored of people quickly once I've figured them out. People make themselves too obvious and desperately blurt everything about themselves on Week 1. So there is no "story" to unravel, nothing to learn.

Will that "missing" piece be something which prevent's my kundalini? Or is this detachment okay?

It's a romantic type of detachment though, like Libra. But I'm confused why I feel a little empty, even though the ruler of Venus is Libra. Shouldn't love be more passionate? Something deep and transformative? Or at least thats what I always see described online.

The girl's seem to enjoy it, but there is something missing for me on my end, but I don't even know what it is or what to look for. There is just this feeling of vague emptiness, or maybe it's just "the grass is greener on the other side".

Or just someone who is equally good at/concerned with intelligent seduction as I am I think is what I want.

As long as it doesn't hinder my spiritual growth I don't really care too much anyway.

 

[sinbad]

I didn't make it clear, sorry.

tl;dr

Is my emotional detachment in romantic matter's a hindrance to my spiritual development/kundalini serpent.

 

[HPS Lydia]

Unconditional love is from a parent to a child, not between couples. New Agers think it's supposed to be everywhere, it's not. That's an illusion, not reality.

To answer your question, no it won't harm your spiritual development or kundalini. Not everyone is the same when it comes to romance. You might not have a strong Mars-Venus aspect, or certain Pluto placements, for example. And that is perfectly fine.

Some people want a borderline obsessive love relationship, this is great for them, but not everyone wants that, and that's fine.

Maybe things will change when you meet someone more compatible with you. We hear of it all the time, someone enjoys romance and dating but it never lasts long, they get bored, until they meet "the one". Or maybe you won't. Regardless, you can still spiritually advance.

It's only when we have blockages and hangups that prevent our advancement. Getting bored, isn't a hangup. In fact it's better to have your lifestyle than it is to be someone who is stuck in a dead relationship (no rex, no romance, no growth) being miserable for decades.

 

[AFODO]

I like to "play" (seduce) my partner's like a musical instrument and watch them react to me.

This is not bad though.
It looks like this is just your personality as of right now, maybe you'll change and settle with someone.

 

[sinbad]

Unconditional love is from a parent to a child, not between couples. New Agers think it's supposed to be everywhere, it's not. That's an illusion, not reality.

To answer your question, no it won't harm your spiritual development or kundalini. Not everyone is the same when it comes to romance. You might not have a strong Mars-Venus aspect, or certain Pluto placements, for example. And that is perfectly fine.

Some people want a borderline obsessive love relationship, this is great for them, but not everyone wants that, and that's fine.

Maybe things will change when you meet someone more compatible with you. We hear of it all the time, someone enjoys romance and dating but it never lasts long, they get bored, until they meet "the one". Or maybe you won't. Regardless, you can still spiritually advance.

It's only when we have blockages and hangups that prevent our advancement. Getting bored, isn't a hangup. In fact it's better to have your lifestyle than it is to be someone who is stuck in a dead relationship (no rex, no romance, no growth) being miserable for decades.

I think with movies and social media a lot of nonsense is promoted, which makes people stray from their natural tendencies.

But isn't obsessive love a bad thing and to be avoided, since Venus is in its detriment in Scorpio?

And also the thing is I have a Mars, Jupiter and Venus disassociated grand trine connected to a kite in Scorpio, and Pluto is actually square my Venus... I don't actually know what/who I want, or what their personality would be like.

I don't know what trait's to discern for, but I really want someone to share/build a life with, particularly an adventerous life. But I dislike enmeshment, or when someone infringes upon my independence/freedom.

However I end up appreciating all types of women, they're very stimulating to my brain and body simultaneously. Even the "boring prude" there is something which would unlock their heart/sexual desire. Even body types, I don't seem to have a type as long as they're not obese lol.

However I do have Saturn in the 8th. Which prevent's me from opening up, and inadvertently keeping thing's at a surface level.

 

[Epiphany]

Just don't lead people on and make them think that it's something that it's not. Manipulating people, using them and discarding them is very wrong, even more so if they think there is potential to build something real and lasting.

 

[sinbad]

Just don't lead people on and make them think that it's something that it's not. Manipulating people, using them and discarding them is very wrong, even more so if they think there is potential to build something real and lasting.

Never. I couldn't treat people like that if I wanted.

 

[monomotapa 2]

I'm not sure if there's something wrong with my love nature or not, however I don't really have a problem with it unless it's something that's "meant" to be fixed (e.g., prevent's the kundalini from being raised).

I've come to realise my definition of love is also different from other's. All this time I assumed it was synonymous with "connection".

I don't think men/women love in the same way generally, but I've never had the thought of receiving love from another person... I've only thought about receiving their respect and admiration, sexual desire towards me, and their affection/nurturing qualities, but not "unconditional love" which is something that seem's unrealistic and pointless to me.

I want companionship with a mentally, emotionally and sexually stimulating partner, and although I do care very deeply about those close to me, it's mostly in a detached way.

A "playmate", if you will.

Women have responded well to me for most of my life, at least on the short term, but I'm wondering am I missing out on something by not caring about deep love. I enjoy romance, but again, it's just sort of a playful dance/game to me, and not this passionate enmeshment that other's have and enjoy.

I don't really care about love, or know what it is, nor what to do with it if I did receive it anyway, but not in a pessimistic way. It's just my default mode. I have a really high sex drive though, and definitely seek out romance, so it's kind of weird dynamic.

I like to "play" (seduce) my partner's like a musical instrument and watch them react to me. I like to admire their positive qualities and be charmed by their conversation/humour, style/beauty etc.

But there is something missing I feel. I want it to be passionate, and yet retain that feeling of it being a game. But I grow bored of people quickly once I've figured them out. People make themselves too obvious and desperately blurt everything about themselves on Week 1. So there is no "story" to unravel, nothing to learn.

Will that "missing" piece be something which prevent's my kundalini? Or is this detachment okay?

It's a romantic type of detachment though, like Libra. But I'm confused why I feel a little empty, even though the ruler of Venus is Libra. Shouldn't love be more passionate? Something deep and transformative? Or at least thats what I always see described online.

The girl's seem to enjoy it, but there is something missing for me on my end, but I don't even know what it is or what to look for. There is just this feeling of vague emptiness, or maybe it's just "the grass is greener on the other side".

Or just someone who is equally good at/concerned with intelligent seduction as I am I think is what I want.

As long as it doesn't hinder my spiritual growth I don't really care too much anyway.

You are absolutely perfect and fine with your relationships. this is how normally relationships are supposed to be. Don't even worry about it remember to focus on what fulfills you the most and keep looking for it

 

[monomotapa 2]

Unconditional love is from a parent to a child, not between couples. New Agers think it's supposed to be everywhere, it's not. That's an illusion, not reality.

To answer your question, no it won't harm your spiritual development or kundalini. Not everyone is the same when it comes to romance. You might not have a strong Mars-Venus aspect, or certain Pluto placements, for example. And that is perfectly fine.

Some people want a borderline obsessive love relationship, this is great for them, but not everyone wants that, and that's fine.

Maybe things will change when you meet someone more compatible with you. We hear of it all the time, someone enjoys romance and dating but it never lasts long, they get bored, until they meet "the one". Or maybe you won't. Regardless, you can still spiritually advance.

It's only when we have blockages and hangups that prevent our advancement. Getting bored, isn't a hangup. In fact it's better to have your lifestyle than it is to be someone who is stuck in a dead relationship (no rex, no romance, no growth) being miserable for decades.

Thank you especially the part of valuing one's lifestyle than trying to make a relationship work

On the part of people that need obsessive love,no I personally think it's not healthy and they should try Sinbads approach which is the healthy approach that leads to no attachment and a healthier free soul