AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
I have a problem that I am reluctant to talk about and that I am somehow ashamed of. I can't have sex with my partner because, in my opinion, he smells terribly repulsive, i.e. very bitter, in the pubic area. You have to understand that I am extremely sensitive to smells and perceive my partner particularly through smell. That's why there are people I instinctively avoid when shopping or on the street or wherever, because I think they "stink for miles upwind", even if they've long since left the place I'm in.
I actually find my partner attractive with his feminine appearance, but every time I get near the pubic area, I get a splitting headache and almost throw up.
Of course, I also asked him to wash himself first. But that didn't help. So it's just nice hugs. I secretly long for a partner with whom I can share everything if he smells nice to me.
A partner with whom I can share everything if he smells nice to me.
Incidentally, the headaches also occur when I think about his pubic area now.
Could it be that I'm not gay at all? I've also had experiences with women. The experiences were also very satisfying and I was very sexually stimulated. However, I didn't even smell the pubic area. I did realize that sex with a man evokes completely different feelings in me than sex with a woman. Let me put it this way: for me, sex with a man is like when a solid form meets a solid form and there is an inner battle to see who is the stronger of the two. Sometimes I feel like a loser and sometimes like a winner. I don't develop any deep feelings. Everything remains on a certain surface and is purely mechanical in order to reach orgasm. I have my protective armor up at all times. I can have sex without commitment, even if it's very fleeting. Sex with a woman, on the other hand, is like being surrounded by a solid form of water into which I can let myself fall and drown with pleasure. Everything around me is so soft and flowing. That is a very beautiful feeling. Here I experience myself completely as a man or can build myself up as a man on the female foundation, but at the same time I am afraid of being crushed and taken over by her love. I then flee from her when I have the feeling that she wants to bind me.
The woman appears to me symbolically like a dragon. I can bathe in her feelings ("blood") and feel like a hero and am secretly terrified of being betrayed by her because I let my guard down in her presence.
I will definitely talk to Father Satan about it. But I would also be interested in your opinion and what you can suggest.
I actually find my partner attractive with his feminine appearance, but every time I get near the pubic area, I get a splitting headache and almost throw up.
Of course, I also asked him to wash himself first. But that didn't help. So it's just nice hugs. I secretly long for a partner with whom I can share everything if he smells nice to me.
A partner with whom I can share everything if he smells nice to me.
Incidentally, the headaches also occur when I think about his pubic area now.
Could it be that I'm not gay at all? I've also had experiences with women. The experiences were also very satisfying and I was very sexually stimulated. However, I didn't even smell the pubic area. I did realize that sex with a man evokes completely different feelings in me than sex with a woman. Let me put it this way: for me, sex with a man is like when a solid form meets a solid form and there is an inner battle to see who is the stronger of the two. Sometimes I feel like a loser and sometimes like a winner. I don't develop any deep feelings. Everything remains on a certain surface and is purely mechanical in order to reach orgasm. I have my protective armor up at all times. I can have sex without commitment, even if it's very fleeting. Sex with a woman, on the other hand, is like being surrounded by a solid form of water into which I can let myself fall and drown with pleasure. Everything around me is so soft and flowing. That is a very beautiful feeling. Here I experience myself completely as a man or can build myself up as a man on the female foundation, but at the same time I am afraid of being crushed and taken over by her love. I then flee from her when I have the feeling that she wants to bind me.
The woman appears to me symbolically like a dragon. I can bathe in her feelings ("blood") and feel like a hero and am secretly terrified of being betrayed by her because I let my guard down in her presence.
I will definitely talk to Father Satan about it. But I would also be interested in your opinion and what you can suggest.