AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
Hello. I'm currently at Days 12-16 of the 40 Day Meditation Program but I haven't performed the Dedication ritual yet because I must confess that I don't feel ready and that I have to cumulate more knowledge in order of overcoming my fear of dedicating myself to Satan.
This fear comes from the matrixing of our Western society by the Judeo-Xian church I'm aware of it. I am not baptized nor related to Abrahamic religions in any ways, I consider myself as a pagan but I still got those prejudices about Satanism that I need to work on. That's why I'm studying, reading you guys here on the forum and practicing the meditations.
About the mediations: I feel weird sometimes and my eyes and mind are sore from the mediations, also, I can "dive" into the vortex, kind of like a Kaleidoscope mostly from red, orange, green, white and kind of blue mixed with puprle colors but if I stare for too long, I've flashes and I instantly stop mediation because that frighten me (I'm having these for almost 8 years now. I see faces and peoples too, mostly women, just as they were in front of me, so realistic). These flashes are yellow or white. Sometimes, I try to "dive" a little deeper and longer, but I fear too much and right now, I refuse to go there.
Also My head spin by itself when I do the "EZ chakra spinning", the more I get into it, the more it spin, to the points that it is clearly spinning and not just a feeling. I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Is it dangerous to practice this program without the protection of Satan?
To conclude, were you guys also afraid to do the ritual of dedication? I understand than vanquishing this fear is also part of the ritual (correct?) but right now, I just feel like i need to vanquish this fear with knowledge and think if is it worth it to dedicate myself to the program in a spirituality matter? (as I know that I get health benefits and sharpening of the mind & will from this)
This fear comes from the matrixing of our Western society by the Judeo-Xian church I'm aware of it. I am not baptized nor related to Abrahamic religions in any ways, I consider myself as a pagan but I still got those prejudices about Satanism that I need to work on. That's why I'm studying, reading you guys here on the forum and practicing the meditations.
About the mediations: I feel weird sometimes and my eyes and mind are sore from the mediations, also, I can "dive" into the vortex, kind of like a Kaleidoscope mostly from red, orange, green, white and kind of blue mixed with puprle colors but if I stare for too long, I've flashes and I instantly stop mediation because that frighten me (I'm having these for almost 8 years now. I see faces and peoples too, mostly women, just as they were in front of me, so realistic). These flashes are yellow or white. Sometimes, I try to "dive" a little deeper and longer, but I fear too much and right now, I refuse to go there.
Also My head spin by itself when I do the "EZ chakra spinning", the more I get into it, the more it spin, to the points that it is clearly spinning and not just a feeling. I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Is it dangerous to practice this program without the protection of Satan?
To conclude, were you guys also afraid to do the ritual of dedication? I understand than vanquishing this fear is also part of the ritual (correct?) but right now, I just feel like i need to vanquish this fear with knowledge and think if is it worth it to dedicate myself to the program in a spirituality matter? (as I know that I get health benefits and sharpening of the mind & will from this)