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Question #1247: I broke up with someone, I'm desperate

AskSatanOperator

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I ended a relationship with someone I loved very, very much, but since the beginning of it there were many fights, arguments, problems that we didn't know how to solve. We made a lot of mistakes, but we loved each other. Both she and I had anxiety and depression, and none of the past traumas were healed. We suffered and suffered, but we stayed together, trying everything to make our relationship work. She and I fought so, so hard to make it work, and both she and I wanted it to be us.

But after a while, the anxiety in my chest wouldn't let up. Both she and I knew that the best thing to do was to end it, and today, we did. We love each other, and we want the good of each other, and it wasn't fair that we were suffering like this. It was a very sad goodbye, I am already missing you terribly and I am desperate. I don't know what to do to calm myself down, I can't meditate properly, I am afraid of everything. I don't know what to do.

I have been dedicated for 1 year, I need advice and help, please. I feel myself wasting away, this pain, this anxiety is unbearable, I can't do anything, I won't be able to do anything, I can't imagine my life without it. I have to be strong, but I don't know how. I need some advice, I should know how to deal with it, but I don't know. This is really, really hurting, I don't know what to do. I'm running after a psychologist and a psychiatrist, and start treatment, but I'm so afraid. My heart won't calm down.

I can't feel anything anymore. I feel distant from everything. I am afraid. I know that this is a place for serious questions, but I am desperate.
 
At the very beginning you need to take care of yourself. You need to overcome depression and anxiety, because through this a person can behave irrationally and later regret what he or she has done or said.
Your love also needs to heal. Being in such a relationship without healing can cause too much pain.
When you both change then you can be with each other again.

Don't give up. It's worth fighting to be happy.

Good luck!
 
Some of this pain is natural as you detach from a loved one. Remember that both of you will be fine and able to find love again. This is not a life or death situation and it will pass. It sounds like you made the right choice, and this has to be remembered. It is painful, but progress nonetheless.

The easiest way to calm yourself is through breathing exercises. You can breath in, hold for some seconds, then exhale. Repeat this and it will induce physical relaxation. Alternate nostril breathing is also help here.

You can also invoke ether energy and program it to calm you in a balanced manner. If you are already suffering from anxiety, the water and earth of ether will be naturally calming. For depression, the fire and air energies will lighten your mood and make it so you don't feel hopeless.

Although meditation is necessary here, it can be hard to do when your mind is elsewhere. Therefore, I would focus on any sort of physical exercise that you can possibly do. This includes the above, as well as yoga, but it can also be simply walking around outside. This is one of the most basic ways to improve your mood which does not require a large input of effort.
 
A true healthy relationship, helps to heal each other. It sounds like neither of you healed or helped the other heal.

However, damaged people cannot help others heal. You both need to heal yourselves, and then perhaps you will be together again, or perhaps you will each find different loves.

Everyone needs to work on healing. Otherwise they cannot be in healthy relationships, both will suffer. This is just how it is. You have all the tools you need from the JoS to become healthy in every way! I wish you luck in healing and becoming strong and happy :)
 
In order to love properly, both partners must grow, heal and change as people and be willing to adapt and keep moving forward.

This can be extremely difficult in some circumstances and relationships. I have personally dealt with alot when it comes to relationship issues.

What I have learned from this is that in many circumstances even if it appears bad, it is usually possible to work through and grow through things together, but this can be very difficult in the moment.

People take time to change. This includes ourselves.

Many people do not know how to love properly, as they have come from dysfunctional homes and circumstances which are more common by the day, that shape someone's view of relationships and carries over into their behaviors and thought process when approaching this.

Satanists are not exempt of this either. We must be very vigilant and aware of what we need to work on to escape tragedy in many aspects of our lives, this goes for things outside of relationships as well.

I wish you luck and good winds of fate ahead. Likely in time you will be in a better place to find love or even rekindle your love with this person if you both have made effort to change and grow, but unfortunately sometimes this isn't the case, even if the possibility is there.

The reason being is sometimes this isn't the best for us. But it really depends.

Everything is going to be alright. You got this.
 
10 months ago, I went through something very similar to you.
The woman I thought was my soul mate, she left me for another man.
It hurts. It felt like my entire life was falling apart and my world was ending.
But I will say this; time does heal on it's own.
But you know what is even better? As a Spiritual Satanist, you'll never truly be alone.
You have meditations and yoga to help you heal emotionally and to take your mind off it in general.
Looking back at those 10 months, I can say with certainty, that I have gotten over it by 85% now.
It will take time, but it will be totally worth it.
Even just taking the time to mentally speak to Satan or your GD will be beneficial as our Gods are always with us, even at the lowest points of our lives.

I wish you all the best, going forward.
HAIL SATAN!
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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