AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
So I'm doing 10 Meditations a day, I start with an F-RTR, or I clean my Aura and chakras first and then do Aura of Protection and then do it, then after meditations I do the current ritual schedule and I try my best to do translations too, but certain days I get busy so I don't have time.
So in total, if you add the F-RTR, rituals and translations, in total I'm doing 15 things.
to do all of my meditations, if I'm not in a rush, I take close to 3 hours if not more, then add the F-RTR and the schedule, so roughly 4-5 hours. It doesn't seem like a lot, but I just feel like all I do is meditate (schedule included) and sleep.
Today I went past the nagging voice and did something I wanted, it felt great, but I couldn't fully relax because I'm worried I'm upsetting the Gods..
I know I can post on the forums, but I really want to keep my anonymity for this matter...
Do you think I can have fun? I feel a little drained. Not from meditations, but from a lack of not doing what I'd like.
Can it be due to the fact that I have Saturn, Retrograde, as my main chart ruler? Retrograde Saturn people don't know when to put limits for themselves, but if one were to look at my chart, they'd see that I tend to think there's more limits on me than not.
Is this what's causing it? Please tell me. Should I just focus solely on meditations and try to toughen past the cravings of fun and whatnot?
I do feel like it's taking a mental toll on me, but I just want to know..
I know that SS is a balance between Physical and Spiritual, but I just gotta know if you should just focus on meditations?
So in total, if you add the F-RTR, rituals and translations, in total I'm doing 15 things.
to do all of my meditations, if I'm not in a rush, I take close to 3 hours if not more, then add the F-RTR and the schedule, so roughly 4-5 hours. It doesn't seem like a lot, but I just feel like all I do is meditate (schedule included) and sleep.
Today I went past the nagging voice and did something I wanted, it felt great, but I couldn't fully relax because I'm worried I'm upsetting the Gods..
I know I can post on the forums, but I really want to keep my anonymity for this matter...
Do you think I can have fun? I feel a little drained. Not from meditations, but from a lack of not doing what I'd like.
Can it be due to the fact that I have Saturn, Retrograde, as my main chart ruler? Retrograde Saturn people don't know when to put limits for themselves, but if one were to look at my chart, they'd see that I tend to think there's more limits on me than not.
Is this what's causing it? Please tell me. Should I just focus solely on meditations and try to toughen past the cravings of fun and whatnot?
I do feel like it's taking a mental toll on me, but I just want to know..
I know that SS is a balance between Physical and Spiritual, but I just gotta know if you should just focus on meditations?