MercuryWisdom
Well-known member
Hey, brothers and sisters.
Recently, and due to numerous hard events, and heavy transits. I have been maturing at an unprecendent and sometimes even harsh rate.
Well, although this maturity is something good to develop and needed to properly advance and grow to be the man I want to be. It feels seriously strange and isolating.
It feels really isolating to know that like 99% of the people in your life are on a low level of understanding. Either physically or even online.
I have moved out finally. Now, hit with the serious and heavy burden of having to care for myself financially, and also endless responsibilities that most teenagers my age can not seem to understand at this age.
I have cut ties with most people and realized truly. That the most of people like 95%+ of people in my life are utter trash and have been holding me down with distractions, feelings, and pleasure, etc.
Now, I am left with a clean slate. All alone with tons of responsibilities, needs for social belonging friendship and love. And also a serious hunger for deep knowledge and advancement and wanting to share my epiphanies with people I care about so bad but I know I just can't.. not anymore.
I've deleted social media for now and I don't seem to enjoy friendship or relationships that much. I only deal with people in regards to work or study.
I have been fascinated with Carl Jung's books trying to read them now and trying to actually read and meditate.
After going through so much. I have realized the world and especially Gen Z are genuinely fucked.
Their attention span would need years of fixing just to meditate for 5 decent mins or something.
Tiktok, Instagram, Snapchat, etc are human catastrophes. They don't even have an idea how badly they are screwed over. Watching a goddamn youtube video is boring and almost impossible with them even. Let alone read a book!
I am not able to relate with people anymore and although it's sad. I just hope I can grow.
Sometimes, I ask myself is it even worth it to take studying, advancement, and development seriously if it just means more loneliness, estrangement, and responsibilities for me.
It's also pretty hard to deal with the fact that I am also seriously fucked over and will have to deal with all of my mistakes, karma, spiritual filth, hangups, blockages, attention span, out of control mind, etc.
Recently, and due to numerous hard events, and heavy transits. I have been maturing at an unprecendent and sometimes even harsh rate.
Well, although this maturity is something good to develop and needed to properly advance and grow to be the man I want to be. It feels seriously strange and isolating.
It feels really isolating to know that like 99% of the people in your life are on a low level of understanding. Either physically or even online.
I have moved out finally. Now, hit with the serious and heavy burden of having to care for myself financially, and also endless responsibilities that most teenagers my age can not seem to understand at this age.
I have cut ties with most people and realized truly. That the most of people like 95%+ of people in my life are utter trash and have been holding me down with distractions, feelings, and pleasure, etc.
Now, I am left with a clean slate. All alone with tons of responsibilities, needs for social belonging friendship and love. And also a serious hunger for deep knowledge and advancement and wanting to share my epiphanies with people I care about so bad but I know I just can't.. not anymore.
I've deleted social media for now and I don't seem to enjoy friendship or relationships that much. I only deal with people in regards to work or study.
I have been fascinated with Carl Jung's books trying to read them now and trying to actually read and meditate.
After going through so much. I have realized the world and especially Gen Z are genuinely fucked.
Their attention span would need years of fixing just to meditate for 5 decent mins or something.
Tiktok, Instagram, Snapchat, etc are human catastrophes. They don't even have an idea how badly they are screwed over. Watching a goddamn youtube video is boring and almost impossible with them even. Let alone read a book!
I am not able to relate with people anymore and although it's sad. I just hope I can grow.
Sometimes, I ask myself is it even worth it to take studying, advancement, and development seriously if it just means more loneliness, estrangement, and responsibilities for me.
It's also pretty hard to deal with the fact that I am also seriously fucked over and will have to deal with all of my mistakes, karma, spiritual filth, hangups, blockages, attention span, out of control mind, etc.