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Dating: Lies Told to Men [part 1]

Greetings, High Priestess Lydia, tomorrow I have to ask the girl I enchanted with the GEBO Rune for 100 days if she would like to go out on a date with me. I already mentioned her to you under your Mercury retrograde sermon.

Could I please ask if you also have any advice regarding the asking for dates part? I wish she could know what kind of person I really am as I know her because she is always kind and friendly to me. I'm not afraid that she might refuse in the name of friendship, but I'm afraid that she might refuse because I won't be able to handle the situation of asking her out in the most correct way.

Even the tests I experience with friends to try how to ask her out make me feel a lot of anxiety and it's a total failure where I can't say what's in my head...

I know it shouldn't be said, but I think that I am suitable for her as a boyfriend, at least much more suitable than the other guys with whom she has been in toxic and unethical relationships... that's why I cast a spell on her with GEBO, I wanted to encourage our relationship without "forcing" her to love me, but generating this love spontaneously in her (the role of the GEBO rune) ... I really feel so much for her and I know I do because I've felt so much for many girls in the past, but nothing compared to how I feel for this one.

If it's not a problem for you, could I ask you for some advice on how to ask her out in the most effective way, please? Obviously only if you like... Thank you so much!!!
PS I will ask to go out by phone because by text I would have less "debate" on the situation and therefore less control over its management.
Using a GEBO rune for 100 days in order to cast a spell seems like some determination in achieving the goal. Still, I would like to ask the following. What have you done additionally during those 100 days in order to become more loveable, i.e., to make sure the spell cast would work better? Maybe you have detected your personal flaws that you have fixed? Or maybe you improved in other ways as a person.

One thing I notice from your post and mentions about anxiety is that it appears you have overinvested emotionally in that person. For that single person you used the GEBO rune for 100 days. I wonder if she is worth it. If you think that she is worthy, then why do you think so? Can you provide at least 5-10 reasons why she is worthy of your attention despite looks and other external easily detectable factors that anyone can have without any huge effort?

And even if she is worthy of your affection, I would still not see adequate reason to be overinvested that much. Why? Because she might reject you which is up to her, and there is no Magick in the Universe which would force her not to reject you on her own free will. What are you going to do if she rejects you? Will you be able to handle it easily and move on? There is no question about what happens if she accepts you, since this is easy. The hard and interesting stuff starts when you have to fight for something. When you have to deal with undesirable results. And you also need to understand when it is worth fighting, and when it is better to move on.

Regarding asking a woman out, I think jews added too much bullshit about this. From my experience, asking a woman out results in less affection, she might even feel stressed. This is because you put her in the dating context (and her imagination about that context mostly depends on how the jewish bs movies set-up those contexts, thus you are making stuff hard for yourself, either) which is obligation, and then she feels forced to think through lots of stuff, such as: what to wear, what to speak, what to eat, who pays for the first, second date, and so on. And also she thinks a lot about how to scan you to the tiniest details, especially red flags. In other words, by asking out you ask her to invest in you emotionally, and depending on the personality it might be the case that she would then invest her attention way more than she feels you are worthy of. Maybe you do not have 10/10 looks for more investment, maybe she does not know you well enough or maybe there are other reasons that are important to her. So it is up to you to make sure she knows you well enough to decide if you are worthy of her attention and further thinking or not.

This is how you really "date". You do not say: "Hey, Alice. Would you like to come on a date with me?" Instead, you create the conditions for her to desire to be with you. So much so that she would be willing to leave her boyfriend if she had one. Of course, I do not recommend this for the majority of people, but I can say there CAN be a situation where it would be better for the woman you like to leave her boyfriend and be with you. And I know I did not provide any details, since they depend from person to person, but if people do some consistent spiritual work, they should have a high level of intuition to deduce necessary sequences of actions by themselves in order to combine their use of Magick, improving themselves, and setting up the conditions for the opposite sex they want to have good time together and potential future depending on how this time together goes to them.

As for your strategy for approach (using text message), I think it is not something that would work. Maybe she will accept, we do not know that. But still it should be preferable to build relationships in real life. If I were you, I would try to form a connection with her in real life, so it naturally would grow to something more than friendship. And this is done by being and doing something together. For instance, if you have some interesting stuff to do, you can invite her not expecting her for a date. In this way, you would put her in a context to have just a good time without any expectations. Of course, this should not be like this: “Hey, Alice. Would you like to come to my home to watch a movie?” This would be “slightly” idiotic in this case. You should understand that for a woman to like you, you need to create a connection with her that she would feel emotional about you.

To summarize, we need to be as conscious as possible even in our love lives. It is a jewish bullshit that we “fall” in love randomly without being able to do anything about it. No, we do not. We always come to some decision. For some people it is more conscious, for other people it is subconscious. But the decision to love or not to love is always made.
 
Greetings, High Priestess Lydia, tomorrow I have to ask the girl I enchanted with the GEBO Rune for 100 days if she would like to go out on a date with me. I already mentioned her to you under your Mercury retrograde sermon.

Could I please ask if you also have any advice regarding the asking for dates part? I wish she could know what kind of person I really am as I know her because she is always kind and friendly to me. I'm not afraid that she might refuse in the name of friendship, but I'm afraid that she might refuse because I won't be able to handle the situation of asking her out in the most correct way.

Even the tests I experience with friends to try how to ask her out make me feel a lot of anxiety and it's a total failure where I can't say what's in my head...

I know it shouldn't be said, but I think that I am suitable for her as a boyfriend, at least much more suitable than the other guys with whom she has been in toxic and unethical relationships... that's why I cast a spell on her with GEBO, I wanted to encourage our relationship without "forcing" her to love me, but generating this love spontaneously in her (the role of the GEBO rune) ... I really feel so much for her and I know I do because I've felt so much for many girls in the past, but nothing compared to how I feel for this one.

If it's not a problem for you, could I ask you for some advice on how to ask her out in the most effective way, please? Obviously only if you like... Thank you so much!!!
PS I will ask to go out by phone because by text I would have less "debate" on the situation and therefore less control over its management.
I’m not Lydia but maybe i could offer some advice you could use if you would like.
Even the tests I experience with friends to try how to ask her out make me feel a lot of anxiety and it's a total failure where I can't say what's in my head...
First the anxiety part,i have this problem even to this day as i could say i’m a overthinker but this problem never stopted me from trying.If you feel something you do will fail that’s not your fault aa the mind is trying to stay in the comfort zone and look for the best scenario in which you won’t get “hurt” as the mind fears and feels that pain just like the physical pain.My advice is don’t stress it out just think once what’s the best way to ask her out(Not over text or phone)and just do it.But try to do it in a non forced way like you really want it aak her that.Don’t fear rejection as everything always happens for a reason maybe you get rejected and meet the love of you’r life the next day which you woudn’t if she didn’t reject you.Also if possble ask her out when you two are in the middle of a nice chat for example like talking smiling laughing as she will feel “safe and comfortable”.If not possble and you need to ask over text don’t overthink it as that will make you look like a weird guy.


I will ask to go out by phone
If this is the case try to first strike a conversation and have something to start with and don’t wait for the feeling of the right moment as you will never feel like it’s the right moment just do it(Pray to Satan)as that helped me.

I know it shouldn't be said, but I think that I am suitable for her as a boyfriend, at least much more suitable than the other guys with whom she has been in toxic and unethical relationships...
I don’t want to be a bad guy saying this.But most(not all) girls who get treated bad and were in a toxic relationships will not appreciate you if you are a “nice guy” in the relationship.Now that’s not always the case but when a girl was in love with a “bad guy” untill she “grows” and feels like she needs a MAN she will always find the “nice guys” boring eventually.I’m saying this from expiriance as i was both the nice and the bad guy.And when i was the “bad guy who was cold to them” they always came back to me and called me for even years after breakup even when they had a Boyfrend who was super nice to them.

I wish she could know what kind of person I really am as I know her because she is always kind and friendly to me. I'm not afraid that she might refuse in the name of friendship,
Also i hope you the best of luck and may the Gods bless you with love.This was my Man to Man advice i have from my wast experience in the past.I don’t know how much you had but trust me even if the outcome is bad you will learn something for the future.Hope you the best!!!!!
 
Hi, all of your doubts are highly legitimate, thank you for taking the time! :D
I'll try to answer everything! :)
What have you done additionally during those 100 days in order to become more loveable, i.e., to make sure the spell cast would work better? Maybe you have detected your personal flaws that you have fixed? Or maybe you improved in other ways as a person.
I tried in every way to make her feel comfortable, make her feel appreciated and show her that she can count on me and that I take care of her. She also really liked all this. I really did my best to make this person demonstrate what caring for someone entails, but not in a toxic way, that is, in my opinion, possessive/untrue, but in a spontaneous and profound way. Regarding the flaws, I'll tell you about them in point two.

she is worth it. If you think that she is worthy, then why do you think so?
I think she is worth it because if today I am on the path to becoming the best version of myself, I owe it to her who encouraged me to improve myself as an individual in different ways.

If I am doing it, it is obviously because of the excellent means that Satanism offers and my commitment, but everything was born because she encouraged me to take care of myself, and because, when I was afraid of not making it, she truly believed in me so that I wouldn't have problems and do the same and wouldn't give up. She was the only one who supported me through it all.

Obviously I am human and I still have flaws, but the way I have abandoned certain things that were never part of me and the level to which I have improved, is for personal work that she encouraged. And the progress between before and after is very, very evident.

Can you provide at least 5-10 reasons why she is worthy of your attention despite looks and other external easily detectable factors that anyone can have without any huge effort?
I'll give you one that's worth ten, I could actually list ten of her qualities that I haven't found elsewhere in the way she has them, but I prefer to give you just one, but that's worth ten: it's not just me who has taken care of her.

Apart from a small period now largely overcome in which we were a little detached, she has always made sure and still makes sure to care about me very much.

Then I could talk to you about her qualities which are the things I really look for in a girl such as the total absence of harmful vices, her way of having compassion for everyone, her cheerfulness, the total lack of vulgarity/scurrility, etc. they are concrete things, but they can be summed up as that her way of taking care of herself and of me, managing to express the best things that she is made of, is truly something that I cannot help but deeply love and appreciate for the person she is.

I would still not see adequate reason to be overinvested that much. Why?
Because if I think something is worth working on, I have no problem continuing it for 100 days or more. Personal sacrifice doesn't scare me, it scares me of being too lazy not to dedicate myself to the noblest things. If there is the possibility after 100 days to build something really very positive and full of love and life, then I am happy to increase the beautiful things in the universe, which in this case concern me and her, including her well-being.

What are you going to do if she rejects you?
I can't force her to make certain decisions. And I don't want to do that. If she wants to reject me or even enter into a toxic relationship as she usually has, I cannot interfere with her free will, but because of our relationship I think it is my duty to at least try to offer her something higher than her classic "love" relationship that is harmful and possessive where only her boyfriend counts and other things that I feel annoyed just talking about.

So I assure you that mine is not a vision in the style of a strange Jewish romantic movie. In my small way, I can humbly be sure of this. :)

Tomorrow I will study your reply even more to learn better, but I felt like giving you an answer now that I saw the notification.
Thank you again!! :D
 
The enemy has worked long and hard to destroy us in various ways. One of these ways is our basic happiness of having a partner with whom we have a sense of belonging, someone to strive towards life goals with, someone to grow and advance with. Love is imperative for growth, it is how the Gods made us, and the enemy knows this and has done everything they can to exploit or destroy this.

For this post, I will use the word “marriage”, but of course this applies to any significant relationship, not just the legal contract or church marriage. Love is not always simplistic, there are other forms of relationships that are better suited for some people.

There are many lies told to us regarding this topic. One of which, is the whole concept of “dating”. These days, it is made out to be the winning goal: have lots of dates. Thinking critically, this is obviously not the end goal. The purpose of dating used to be to find a partner and get married.

But now, married men are looked down upon in the hierarchy of men while the ones who can’t even keep a long-term relationship are seen as the “most successful” just because they get a bunch of meaningless dates with random women. Marriage is seen as being “tied to the old ball-and-chain” (spouse).

Not everyone is meant to find a permanent relationship from a young age, many people are still on a journey of evolving and will have more relationships through their current life. This is perfectly normal and healthy for various people.

But the current trend (for the past few decades) of feeling the need to constantly “play the dating game” prevents people from finding lasting love, promotes a sense of narcissism yet simultaneously a sense of inferiority, and prevents people from being able to have real bonds with others. Adding to this, the world opened up a lot in recent decades and people now have too many choices, too many options, which makes them unable to narrow in on a select few. And the common mindset of “the grass is greener on the other side” doesn’t help.

People are being programmed to feel insecure and worthless, over random things that don’t even truly matter. Ask yourself what actually matters in life, and keep it in mind.


Lie: You need to be very attractive/tall/fit to find a partner, otherwise you’re doomed to be an incel.

Have the people who believe this, never looked at reality? Just look at all the ugly, short, fat men who find wives and live a happy family life. As for height, not all women like tall men, so stop telling yourself that’s what all women want.

Something very important you should know: women like familiarity. If we have feelings for a man, he is more attractive in our eyes. Some women aren’t like this and are shallow, but for most of us, we find the men we love to be more attractive to us. We also tend to think our male relatives are more attractive, simply because they are of us, of our blood.

Exercising will increase your appearance and put you into a higher category, plus it’s just good for your physical and mental health anyway; but it is not necessary, as proven by all the out-of-shape men who still find love anyway.

Lie: You need to make a lot of money to impress women.

For certain women, yes. This is in their natal charts, to marry wealthy men of status. But for most women, it isn’t. Most people are average (of varying degrees and areas) and will end up with partners who are on equal to them. Again, look at reality. Look at all the couples who scrape by on not much money, but they still have each other.

There are many things that can impress a woman. The ability to hold a conversation, the ability to fix something in the house, the ability to develop a skill or work on a talent, the ability to be reliable and trustworthy, the ability to bring us out of a rut and add excitement into our lives, the ability to make us feel valued and special, the ability to get along with our friends and family, the ability to take an interest in our interests, as a few examples. The list is endless!

Lie: It’s impossible to get a girlfriend, let alone a wife.

Get this out of your head. De-program yourself from those incel websites you follow, they are ruining your mind and your life. It’s easy to find someone. De-program your mind and do a freeing the soul working if needed, if you have any karma or curses regarding relationships. Don’t listen to toxic naysayers who gave up on life, find better friends who encourage you. Learn from people who have real life experience.

Lie: Relationships are too hard, so why bother?

Well, there is work involved. But this is a part of life. You struggle to get ahead in life, or you stagnate and dissipate. Give and take, help your partner and you get helped in return. If you love someone, doing things becomes easier in a way, because you have more of a sense of purpose, and you get more out of it. Why cook food for just yourself, when you can make an enjoyable meal together?

Lie: You need to go to a bar to meet women.

Sure, if you’re looking for a drunken one-night-stand. But if you’re looking to meet someone significant, you’d be better off meeting through friends or family, or through a hobby or at an event.

Lie: You need to be super-confident and outgoing.

A lot of women prefer men who are more introverted, who spend more time thinking and reading, for example. We all have our own personalities, women do not all like the exact same type of man. Many men who are shy are very endearing. And if you don’t know something, be open about it, but you can mention your other skills. And work on developing skills. Those of you who are donors read my article some months ago on Real Self-Confidence, I hope it was helpful.

Lie: You need to approach every woman as a potential date.

No! Many of us are meant to be friends. The Gods want men and women to be friends. Having friends of the opposite gender can enrich your life and broaden your mind, and propel society forwards. Of all the women in the world, not all are meant to be your partner. Treating every woman as a potential date automatically limits the interaction and prevents networking for friends, gaining various opportunities, or otherwise expanding your life in whatever way.

Lie: You need to pretend to be someone you’re not.

Don’t ever do this, because you will only get women who are not suited for you anyway, and you will be unhappy with yourself. Learn to appreciate who you are, develop any areas you are lacking in, in a healthy way for you. In order to find the most suitable partner for you, you must be yourself. Present yourself as you are (maybe polish up any bad manners or crassness, but not in a pretentious way). Also, any women of quality is likely to see through falseness.

Lie: You need to wear fancy suits (or whatever trendy clothing style).

Lots of women actually don’t like these clothes. Be yourself, wear the clothes that make you happy. Just make sure they are relatively clean and don’t smell bad. Maybe consider trying a new updated style, but basically stick with reflecting your personality and tastes.

Lie: If you have not yet had a girlfriend, you are an “incel” and will always be so.

Get this out of your head. Many people do not enter significant relationships until a bit later in life, this is in the natal chart and has been common throughout history. And get rid of the word “incel”, rid yourself of thinking this is your identity. The word used to be “bachelor”, which is far more respectable. Don’t program yourself to believe you will always be an “incel”, because your thoughts are powerful especially as you advance.

Let me make this very clear: you shape your reality. Make sure you shape it in the best way for you, and do the necessary workings and actions to shape the life you want.

Tying in with this: your life will not always remain the exact same. We go through transformations in life. Transiting Pluto entering a new natal house or aspecting a natal planet can be life-changing. Uranus too. What you are now, is not what you will always be. Stay open to guidance from the Gods for ways to change your life for the better!

Lie: You need a girlfriend/wife this very instant or else you’re doomed and a failure.

No, you can focus on other areas of life, such as getting ahead in your career as much as you can, before finding someone to spend time with. You can put the extra energy you have during your teens and 20’s to further your training and career. Life is not something to be entirely won by a set age, it’s a full path of evolving and developing.

Which leads us to the opposing lie:

Lie: You shouldn’t have a relationship until you are X age.

Many successful relationships, and successful people who have relationships, began when they were still in high school. Life happens at different stages for different people, all of humanity will never have the exact same experiences at the exact same ages. That’s not how life works, as shown in astrology and proven by observing reality, both current and historically.

Lie: You must get married.

Not necessarily. We all have our own paths in life, most people should get married and have a family, but this is not for everyone. If it’s your path to remain a bachelor then do so, but don’t be closed to the idea of at least having a romantic companion for part of your life’s journey. Love is not always simplistic, there are other forms of relationships that are better suited for some people. And we are not YOLO, we have stages in our lifetimes to Godhead.

Lie: You need attention from women to be validated in life.

Don’t be a narcissist, don’t think all the women in the entire world are supposed to notice you, don’t think you’re the only person in existence. Everyone has their own things going on in life. You get attention from your friends and family, and occasionally from strangers. And, don’t think you are worthless by not getting attention from everyone. This is a very unhealthy mindset to have. Don’t feel inferior to those who get more attention than you do. Feel comfortable and happy with yourself, and know that the Gods and Goddesses are on your side; this alone should make you feel content if others don’t always notice you.

Lie: What you see on social media etc is the truth, or representative of all women.

Social media is filled with lies and illusions and people living in delusions and trying to project those delusions. Also, the women there do not reflect all women. Many women are shy or not interested in being an “influencer”. The influencers of social media are grossly over-represented, because they are the ones on social media; hence, the ones you see most often. Ignore what they want or claim or state, because they are only a small percentage of the female population and they certainly do not speak for all women.

Lie: You should always be noble and fair to other men when dating.

Ever hear the phrase “all’s fair in love and war”? Shake off your competition and go after the woman you want. She will appreciate the fact that you want her that much, and she will feel more valued by you.


In closing, ignore the lies that are meant to program us. Always think critically and observe reality, both current and historically. Have hope, never give up hope for a better future. We will lead the world to a brighter future.

On a final note, here’s a tip to help you with women: work on your personality and your mind. These are the things that matter, and will keep her interested in you. Improve your conversational skills, ensure she feels like you are truly listening to her, establish a connection with her. Relationships are built over time and shared experiences. Be patient when required, be spontaneous when required, be passionate when required.

Love is a journey, and is meant to benefit everyone involved.


[Part 2 will be regarding lies told to women.]
Thanks I needed this it helps to hear
From a women that is well knowledgeable about this subject
Of women I'm shy sometimes especially if I want to talk to a
Beautiful woman but this helped me
Out a lot
Hail Satan!!!
 
I’m not Lydia but maybe i could offer some advice you could use if you would like.

First the anxiety part,i have this problem even to this day as i could say i’m a overthinker but this problem never stopted me from trying.If you feel something you do will fail that’s not your fault aa the mind is trying to stay in the comfort zone and look for the best scenario in which you won’t get “hurt” as the mind fears and feels that pain just like the physical pain.My advice is don’t stress it out just think once what’s the best way to ask her out(Not over text or phone)and just do it.But try to do it in a non forced way like you really want it aak her that.Don’t fear rejection as everything always happens for a reason maybe you get rejected and meet the love of you’r life the next day which you woudn’t if she didn’t reject you.Also if possble ask her out when you two are in the middle of a nice chat for example like talking smiling laughing as she will feel “safe and comfortable”.If not possble and you need to ask over text don’t overthink it as that will make you look like a weird guy.



If this is the case try to first strike a conversation and have something to start with and don’t wait for the feeling of the right moment as you will never feel like it’s the right moment just do it(Pray to Satan)as that helped me.


I don’t want to be a bad guy saying this.But most(not all) girls who get treated bad and were in a toxic relationships will not appreciate you if you are a “nice guy” in the relationship.Now that’s not always the case but when a girl was in love with a “bad guy” untill she “grows” and feels like she needs a MAN she will always find the “nice guys” boring eventually.I’m saying this from expiriance as i was both the nice and the bad guy.And when i was the “bad guy who was cold to them” they always came back to me and called me for even years after breakup even when they had a Boyfrend who was super nice to them.


Also i hope you the best of luck and may the Gods bless you with love.This was my Man to Man advice i have from my wast experience in the past.I don’t know how much you had but trust me even if the outcome is bad you will learn something for the future.Hope you the best!!!!!
HI! Your advice really put me at ease. And for this you don't know how much I thank you, especially the first thing you told me gave me a lot of calm. :D I would just like to be more specific on this point:
I don’t want to be a bad guy saying this.But most(not all) girls who get treated bad and were in a toxic relationships will not appreciate you if you are a “nice guy” in the relationship.Now that’s not always the case but when a girl was in love with a “bad guy” untill she “grows” and feels like she needs a MAN she will always find the “nice guys” boring eventually.I’m saying this from expiriance as i was both the nice and the bad guy.And when i was the “bad guy who was cold to them” they always came back to me and called me for even years after breakup even when they had a Boyfrend who was super nice to them.

Let me make it clear that she didn't go looking for bad boys, and when she discovered that some things were wrong for her, she immediately ended the relationship when she saw what kind of people some of her exes had turned out to be.

None of these relationships were with thugs, criminals or bad boys, but they were nevertheless unethical relationships, or where the guy failed to give her what was good for her, or both, making her sometimes feel oppressed and insecure, and not happy and satisfied.

I, on the other hand, have always made her feel happy and satisfied and never oppressed and insecure (she herself told me this several times), which is why I said that I am better suited to her.
 
I dislike the current dating scene, and never was a part of it because of how unnatural it felt.

Ask out for a date, awkward small talk during dinner? Some people really like this though.

The best, and most natural, way to get a relationship, is to spend time with her, and when the time feels right, kiss her. From there, a relationship can grow. And it's more romantic, because it feels natural, not forced. The woman doesn't feel obligated to let you kiss her just because you paid for dinner.

A first kiss should be natural and feel right, this sets the tone for the entire relationship.

But of course, these days it's less likely to spend time with someone unless it's an established date. My parents met because their parents were friends and their siblings were friends and living in a small town, so their meeting was inevitable. Both sets of my grandparents met because small town, and had relatives in common. My aunt met her husband because she was friends with his sister. But these days people go on dates with people they hardly know.

As for asking her out by phone, why not in person? Phone calls are limiting in the sense that there is no body language, no eye contact, and so on. People need this, especially women. Phone calls can cause awkwardness very easily, because they are missing the vital elements of eye contact and body language.
 
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I dislike the current dating scene, and never was a part of it because of how unnatural it felt.

Ask out for a date, awkward small talk during dinner? Some people really like this though.

The best, and most natural, way to get a relationship, is to spend time with her, and when the time feels right, kiss her. From there, a relationship can grow. And it's more romantic, because it feels natural, not forced. The woman doesn't feel obligated to let you kiss her just because you paid for dinner.

A first kiss should be natural and feel right, this sets the tone for the entire relationship.

But of course, these days it's less likely to spend time with someone unless it's an established date. My parents met because their parents were friends and their siblings were friends and living in a small town, so their meeting was inevitable. Both sets of my grandparents met because small town, and had relatives in common. My aunt met her husband because she was friends with his sister. But these days people go on dates with people they hardly know.

As for asking her out by phone, why not in person? Phone calls are limiting in the sense that there is no body language, no eye contact, and so on. People need this, especially women. Phone calls can cause awkwardness very easily, because they are missing the vital elements of eye contact and body language.
Couldn't agree more.
In articles I've written about dating (on personal blogs) and a radio podcast I run for college, I have talked about this extensively.
One quote of mine resonates with this:
"You are either dating or looking for a relationship. These things are antithetical."

Forced, artificial dates are stupid, and online dating is just the same thing, amplified. This kind of enviroment is also where male hate of women forms, inceldom begins and a geniune connection is lost.
I have never struggled with attracting romantic attention, or having results from dating. Must be something from my chart, because I consider this innate, I didn't work for it. If anything, I worked to understand why I have this advantage, and that's what gave me knowledge.
One thing I can say for certain is that you will get the best results if you simply socialize with both genders in your specific ingroup. Make friends at the gym, of which some will be girls. Make friends in school/college, of which some will be girls. Be social in the places you frequent, not to specifically approach girls with a dating interest, but to make friends, of which some will be female. Of these female friends, some will be attracted to you. Of those, some you will click with. Take your pick.

If you, instead, view interaction with the opposite gender through the "dating" lens, you will see EVERY interaction with a girl that doesn't result in sex or a relationship as a failure on your part. This is an issue of framing, and I might elaborate on psychological framing in dating in a post at some point. It's important and it's a paradigm shift that will change how one sees romance forever.
 
I dislike the current dating scene, and never was a part of it because of how unnatural it felt.

Ask out for a date, awkward small talk during dinner? Some people really like this though.

The best, and most natural, way to get a relationship, is to spend time with her, and when the time feels right, kiss her. From there, a relationship can grow. And it's more romantic, because it feels natural, not forced. The woman doesn't feel obligated to let you kiss her just because you paid for dinner.

A first kiss should be natural and feel right, this sets the tone for the entire relationship.

But of course, these days it's less likely to spend time with someone unless it's an established date. My parents met because their parents were friends and their siblings were friends and living in a small town, so their meeting was inevitable. Both sets of my grandparents met because small town, and had relatives in common. My aunt met her husband because she was friends with his sister. But these days people go on dates with people they hardly know.

As for asking her out by phone, why not in person? Phone calls are limiting in the sense that there is no body language, no eye contact, and so on. People need this, especially women. Phone calls can cause awkwardness very easily, because they are missing the vital elements of eye contact and body language.
Actually, I'll tell you, it's my friends who advised me to ask her out on a date in this phone call, I just wanted to call her to suggest that we get to know each other better (in a way not related to a traditional date), also because we often talk about many things already, so what's the point of finding ourselves sitting down to dinner to talk in an "official" way? No sense, it's just a way of forcing things that already exist.

The reason why I used the word "date" is that in today's mentality the vision is not that of an actual relationship, but people ask themselves: "is the way we spend time together as friends or future boyfriends?", and I thought that asking this girl if she wanted to try to get to know each other better disconnected from a date could have been a good middle ground between spending time together and the modern vision of the date.

Every time I tried to explain this thing to a friend of mine, he/she replied: "no, you should exactly ask her out on a date". Which I won't do today anyway because for the reasons I told you it's stupid. We already talk, whether it's at the gym, on the phone, at the bar, on group outings, in what sense should a date be an evolution of this? None.

So what do you think of my original plan where I first explained to her that she means a lot to me, I'm interested and that I wanted to get to know her better (without including embarrassing situations at a romantic dinner, etc.)?

Anyway, thank you for your answer, knowing that I don't have to ask her out on an embarrassing date and that I can continue to follow my true nature has taken away all the reasons why I felt worried. So you've definitely solved my problem, I really owe you a favor, and that's not just a figure of speech, you've solved my problem. Thank you! :D
 
So what do you think of my original plan where I first explained to her that she means a lot to me, I'm interested and that I wanted to get to know her better (without including embarrassing situations at a romantic dinner, etc.)?
This sounds good :)
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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