Ignisalas
Member
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2017
- Messages
- 288
Where do I begin with this? I've recently started to change my mindset and the way I think about myself. I've been doing pretty good and I've been trying to get my body and soul in better shape.
I needed to change because the way I always thought of myself was killing me.
I've been using Raum 50x on my solar plexus and im starting to feel a lot better. I have this weird pain that started with my left eye and my sinuses and I don't know what it is, but im guessing it should pass. I can tell that whatever enemy is out there watching and trying to ruin me really doesn't want me to change. There was a point not long ago where I just outright stopped meditating or doing anything.
I'm a very warm hearted and kind person on the inside but Ive never got to show it to others. The way life has treated me has made me a quiet person that doesn't socialize or talk with others very much. And over the years this quietness has affected me in a way that makes me seem like an evil person, but its not true.
I tried asking Satan for a sign of his influence and guidance in my life, because I've always felt alone, and Ive never really felt any type of presence or anything from the gods in my life whenever life was rough and brutal on me. I haven't gotten many signs in my life that Satan is there for me, and it hurts emotionally. Just seeing 666 here and there but that's about it. No demon encounters, No feeling their energy or presence, No dreams about any of them.
This has caused me a lot of worry that im just not accepted like other SS and that theres something wrong with me that's causing this. I've always had a fear that I might be jewish because I don't know where my family is from. Or maybe the enemy uses this tactic on me too much because it bothers me a lot. I sure as hell don't feel jewish and I know that I have emotions and love for nature, Satan and the gods, etc.
I wanted to get close to Satan and my guardian, but I don't know how too with my current level of progress on this path. I'm not in any good shape right now. All I can really do is talk into the wind and hope they can hear me. I'm ready to make serious changes to my life but I cant do it all by myself. My current situation just wont let me and I wanted to get closer to Satan and my gd for guidance and support. I'm not asking for them to outright do things for me or fix my problems for me, I just wanted to know that they are there for me whenever I need them and whenever things get too hard for me to handle by myself.
Im not sure where to look for any signs. I'm guessing it wont be too big or significant and i'll probably overlook a lot of signs from the gods like I probably do all the time.
After all the things that I've been through im still here and trying to change myself and have a happy outlook on my future. Most people would have given up by now but I haven't.
I just asked Satan for help and for guidance, and I felt like writing this because it eases my mind to talk with others about this.
It also takes my mind off this damned pain in my eye and sinuses.
I needed to change because the way I always thought of myself was killing me.
I've been using Raum 50x on my solar plexus and im starting to feel a lot better. I have this weird pain that started with my left eye and my sinuses and I don't know what it is, but im guessing it should pass. I can tell that whatever enemy is out there watching and trying to ruin me really doesn't want me to change. There was a point not long ago where I just outright stopped meditating or doing anything.
I'm a very warm hearted and kind person on the inside but Ive never got to show it to others. The way life has treated me has made me a quiet person that doesn't socialize or talk with others very much. And over the years this quietness has affected me in a way that makes me seem like an evil person, but its not true.
I tried asking Satan for a sign of his influence and guidance in my life, because I've always felt alone, and Ive never really felt any type of presence or anything from the gods in my life whenever life was rough and brutal on me. I haven't gotten many signs in my life that Satan is there for me, and it hurts emotionally. Just seeing 666 here and there but that's about it. No demon encounters, No feeling their energy or presence, No dreams about any of them.
This has caused me a lot of worry that im just not accepted like other SS and that theres something wrong with me that's causing this. I've always had a fear that I might be jewish because I don't know where my family is from. Or maybe the enemy uses this tactic on me too much because it bothers me a lot. I sure as hell don't feel jewish and I know that I have emotions and love for nature, Satan and the gods, etc.
I wanted to get close to Satan and my guardian, but I don't know how too with my current level of progress on this path. I'm not in any good shape right now. All I can really do is talk into the wind and hope they can hear me. I'm ready to make serious changes to my life but I cant do it all by myself. My current situation just wont let me and I wanted to get closer to Satan and my gd for guidance and support. I'm not asking for them to outright do things for me or fix my problems for me, I just wanted to know that they are there for me whenever I need them and whenever things get too hard for me to handle by myself.
Im not sure where to look for any signs. I'm guessing it wont be too big or significant and i'll probably overlook a lot of signs from the gods like I probably do all the time.
After all the things that I've been through im still here and trying to change myself and have a happy outlook on my future. Most people would have given up by now but I haven't.
I just asked Satan for help and for guidance, and I felt like writing this because it eases my mind to talk with others about this.
It also takes my mind off this damned pain in my eye and sinuses.