#159 Off the wagon

[AskSatanOperator]

I need to get this off my chest. Recently I've had no motivation to meditate. I feel burned out stressed and depressed from my job and everyday life. I'm back to using my drugs of choice (not going to be specific because I've talked about it in the forum). I've tried quitting multiple times but the emotional pain scares me because there have been times I felt so low I started contemplating suicide. Part of me just wants to quit it all at once and meditate for multiple hours a day because that's what I used to be capable of and I just want to go back to that. I wish I had never tried anything because I feel like I can only quit things for a period of time before I start feeling so miserable it seems better to the alternative. I need to get back on track. Today I need to try harder.
Thanks for letting me get this out there so I can realize how bad this is and that I need to do better.
Hail Satan

 

[AristocraticDragon666]

I need to get this off my chest. Recently I've had no motivation to meditate. I feel burned out stressed and depressed from my job and everyday life. I'm back to using my drugs of choice (not going to be specific because I've talked about it in the forum). I've tried quitting multiple times but the emotional pain scares me because there have been times I felt so low I started contemplating suicide. Part of me just wants to quit it all at once and meditate for multiple hours a day because that's what I used to be capable of and I just want to go back to that. I wish I had never tried anything because I feel like I can only quit things for a period of time before I start feeling so miserable it seems better to the alternative. I need to get back on track. Today I need to try harder.
Thanks for letting me get this out there so I can realize how bad this is and that I need to do better.
Hail Satan

It is important to keep a balance between meditations, an excessive number of meditations, including the duration of their conduct, can exhaust your inner energy, which will have to be restored.

 

[AFODO]

Try doing a freeing working with Munka or Ansuz.