My little sermon on competition.

[Big Dipper]

I don't really add anything to the forums, but this is something I happen to have a lot of experience with and this writing is for anyone that wastes their time on toxic competition and I'll talk about what competition has done for me.

First of all I'm a very, very, very competitive person and a cheater by nature. If I ever compete I better get 1st or dead last. Nothing is more insulting to me than 2nd place and it baffles me beyond belief when you lose and people expect you to smile, shake their hand, and yell "good game". It's not supposed to be fun when someone loses, so expecting them to give the other player a sincere Blowjob is absolutely stupid. I've already embarrassed myself by coming this far and losing, and if someone expects me to smile, then they're absolutely braindead. I am too competitive to compete. For example when I was little and playing soccer I was tripping the opposing team, of course I got caught and whipped in front of everyone for it. Another time in little league baseball my coaches always put me in the outfield when I always wanted to be in the infield, so when the coaches kid smacked the ball my way during practice I ran out of the outfield, into the infield and threw the ball at the kid, nailing them in the butt. I got whipped for that too.. Even here recently, after I had already thought I was done throwing myself into competitive predicaments I played the most competitive game known to all, which would be duolingo... I got the number one spot and had to fight to defend it for 7 hours straight. I was learning japanese, but I needed more points, so I took up german AND spanish just to beat this guy. Well, this guy cheated too I don't know what he did, but he got an unreal score and beat me after all that and it was for nothing. I had adrenaline running through me while being braindead for practicing 3 different languages for hours over nothing. I get so bad while trying to get a win in almost any game that I've almost left satanism and would've blown my head off on numerous occasions. So, I think it would make sense that I would stop trying to win at everything. I've been gaming for 18 years straight and im still not good enough to get attention on a jewtube channel. So, for anyone that happens to have an addiction to "gaming", or "winning" the satisfaction you get from a win is nothing compared to a month's worth of meditations. When I first started satanism I did the 40 day self empowerment and I immediately felt the difference, but competition was eating me alive and I ruined myself. I would much prefer the feeling of being halfway through the 6 month meditation session than a few wins in fortnite.

In a couple months I will be a satanist for 4 years and would have nothing to show for it. You would be much better off not having your instant satisfaction for a month, so you could have something that satisfies you indefinitely, or as long as you keep at meditating. Instant satisfaction can be ruining if you let it and it's not even real satisfaction. I would trade the 4 years I spent gaming for satisfaction for meditating, so I could actually listen and talk to the gods. I could've probably been able to talk to dogs at this point too .

So for anyone living in your own pile of self destruction, you should quit your gaming. It won't lead to anything worth your time. I don't know if anybody needed this, but it's here now for anyone that may relate.

 

[Henu the Great]

Wow, great post... I applaude you for sharing your expierence.

In regards to gaming for 1st place with toxic attitude compared to meditation you are right, but also keep in mind that competition can be healthy, and is one outlet for energy. I have come 1st and 3rd in a race, and you bet both were good expierences I take pride in. I wonder, if you would subliminate your competitiveness you could also enjoy competetition in a positive and healthy manner like it's meant to be instead of forgoing competitiveness completely. Something to ponder.

 

[Azalim]

You are right, we should not waste our time on toxic and stressful games. We must focus on meditation and our evolution.

But healthy competition is very important. Through it you can gain more willpower and courage in what you do.
A great example of a competition is that between Naruto and Sasuke, who train a lot to overcome themselves, but still maintaining the friendship between the two. Apply this to meditation, and you can break many barriers.

 

[Big Dipper]

Wow, great post... I applaude you for sharing your expierence.

In regards to gaming for 1st place with toxic attitude compared to meditation you are right, but also keep in mind that competition can be healthy, and is one outlet for energy. I have come 1st and 3rd in a race, and you bet both were good expierences I take pride in. I wonder, if you would subliminate your competitiveness you could also enjoy competetition in a positive and healthy manner like it's meant to be instead of forgoing competitiveness completely. Something to ponder.

If I were to ever sublimate my competitiveness into a goal i'm sure whatever it is that I would want done would get done, but I'm not sure on how I'd do that, mars square? Also you got 1st and 3rd in the same race? :lol: That reminds me of a joke larry the cable guy once said "I once dated a girl that had un-even boobs. One time she went to a boobie pageant and came back with 1st and 3rd place. I was so proud of my sister" :lol:
Im die hard when it comes to winning. Either I win or I don't and I wont have fun unless I win and I think I let that get so bad to the point that I just don't have fun anymore. I don't like going to movies or anything. Even my favorite band Sabaton is on tour near me in the future and I don't think I'll go, because I don't think it would be worth it. Also one story about a race I was in, a long time ago I was racing when our schools used to make us on the track field and I was ahead of everyone by a couple seconds, but at the end I thought I crossed the line and stopped, but I stopped before the line and got second because of that. Cried so hard. That was bullshit, I got first.

 

[Big Dipper]

A great example of a competition is that between Naruto and Sasuke, who train a lot to overcome themselves, but still maintaining the friendship between the two. Apply this to meditation, and you can break many barriers.

aside from the fact they tried to kill each other and blew each other's arms off :lol:, but I know what you mean. If I had someone to compete with in meditation, then I would be off the charts meditating, but I have no one to compete with in person and doing it over the forum doesn't feel as fun.

 

[Henu the Great]

If I were to ever sublimate my competitiveness into a goal i'm sure whatever it is that I would want done would get done, but I'm not sure on how I'd do that, mars square? Also you got 1st and 3rd in the same race? :lol: That reminds me of a joke larry the cable guy once said "I once dated a girl that had un-even boobs. One time she went to a boobie pageant and came back with 1st and 3rd place. I was so proud of my sister" :lol:
Im die hard when it comes to winning. Either I win or I don't and I wont have fun unless I win and I think I let that get so bad to the point that I just don't have fun anymore. I don't like going to movies or anything. Even my favorite band Sabaton is on tour near me in the future and I don't think I'll go, because I don't think it would be worth it. Also one story about a race I was in, a long time ago I was racing when our schools used to make us on the track field and I was ahead of everyone by a couple seconds, but at the end I thought I crossed the line and stopped, but I stopped before the line and got second because of that. Cried so hard. That was bullshit, I got first.

That was a funny joke. I laughed my ass off at morning.

To pinpoint what is the cause of the issue for you, you should look at your natal chart. Mars and Sun could be keys here.

I suppose you could tackle your issue with runes too.