Lost at Sea?

[mmlozza]

Hi all,

I'm 40 next year and have consciously been on this journey of self optimisation for 12 years now. In that time I have experienced a brush mental health, of which happened in 2015 but I have mostly recovered from in the last few years. I am prey to my vices and feel that I am lacking faith/belief in myself, and although knowing is more powerful than believing, it seems to be necessary to make progress on this plane.

I have tried to achieve this on my own without any community to lean on. Lots of online groups have previously been unreliable and divided, which has been disillusioning. I feel like time is running out and I need to reach the grail before I have to repeat this cycle over, but I don't know where to start. I know I'm capable of great things but I really need some advice if possible.

Happy to answer any questions further. Thanks to you all for reading this.

 

[SeguaceDiSatanas]

my vices

Read this:

Actual Self Love: Drugs & Addictions - Fixing One's Self

When one does negative things to one's self, you are not truly "loving yourself". Over the last days I have been doing a lot of further research on addictions, drugs and related problems, since I want to be able to solve these problems for others. At the case where people do this, we can see...

ancient-forums.com

I am prey to my vices

This may help you:

How To Control Addictions, Passions, Animal Drives

Spiritual Satanism stands against every and all enemy dogma. The dogma of the enemy does not provide wisdom, it has no knowledge on how to control anything of a human nature, is anti-human and therefore wants to destroy humanity. Condemning human nature and dismissing it as "Evil", was the key...

ancient-forums.com

brush mental health

Meditation will actually help you

Satanic Meditation

faith/belief in myself

Please, read this quote of mine

This is just MY opinion:

People who lose faith in themselves and others should first understand the difference between faith and trust.

Faith is something you give unconditionally and often regardless of evidence. Trust is something you gain by seeing reality through your own efforts. It may be okay to start with faith in something, but it will certainly turn into trust.

However, when faith is lacking, it can still be replaced by trust; through effort, through "doing things anyway." To gain self-trust, therefore, you must be able to prove to yourself that you deserve it. Furthermore, trust is not something generic.

For example: I have trust that in a fight against a street thug I will be victorious because I know martial arts. But I have no trust at all that if an electrical system breaks at home, I will be able to follow the instruction sheet well to fix it.

But faith is important here because if my electrical system breaks and I don't have faith that I can fix it myself, I will never even try and therefore I will be left in the dark until I can call the technician. If I don't have faith in the technician, I will probably never be able to have a habitable house again.

When I was in the early stages of Satanism, I had to "choose" whether to meditate or not. At first I didn't have faith that I could make the meditations work. But then I asked myself: "is my lack of faith in myself actually getting me somewhere?". I started giving myself a chance, over the years I found that the meditations were successful for me.

Often, not having faith in yourself is just an obstacle to what you could achieve. If you decide to give yourself a chance, you might find yourself surprised by yourself.

Of course, having faith is not enough. I can have faith my whole life that I will become something wonderful, and stay on the couch all the time fantasizing about what I will "one day" achieve, and never achieve it.

Faith is the first step, the initial concession you give yourself to allow yourself to start working on big goals. But then you have to start working on those goals. If you do that, you will gain confidence that you are doing well, and that is the only way to have self-esteem.

True self-esteem is built through recognition of your own achievements. Sometimes you will fall, but faith in yourself will allow you to always get back up.



Faith is something you have to give yourself. Faith is called that because it is often blind, as such, you can afford to make this effort. For yourself.

Faith should not be wasted on things that do not deserve it (like Jesus, etc.) precisely because faith, being non-rational, could be dangerous if mismanaged. Christians are an example of this.

But having faith in yourself is always an advantage, it is always a good thing. It is the way you have to get a chance to advance yourself. You are not wasting it or mismanaging it, as long as you give it to yourself and the Gods.

Maybe you can lose your self-confidence, not your faith. However, if you continue to strive, your trust will be rewarded. We are Satanists. Satanism is exactly the way that shows us how our faith is well placed, to transform our actions into trust. What concerns us in strong self-esteem.

Lots of online groups have previously been unreliable and divided, which has been disillusioning.

The Joy of Satan will always be here for all Satanist brothers and sisters. You can always count on us. Here the children of Satan, the true children of Satan, are truly united to ADVANCE!

May the Gods bless you!!

 

[mmlozza]

Read this:

Actual Self Love: Drugs & Addictions - Fixing One's Self

When one does negative things to one's self, you are not truly "loving yourself". Over the last days I have been doing a lot of further research on addictions, drugs and related problems, since I want to be able to solve these problems for others. At the case where people do this, we can see...

ancient-forums.com

This may help you:

How To Control Addictions, Passions, Animal Drives

Spiritual Satanism stands against every and all enemy dogma. The dogma of the enemy does not provide wisdom, it has no knowledge on how to control anything of a human nature, is anti-human and therefore wants to destroy humanity. Condemning human nature and dismissing it as "Evil", was the key...

ancient-forums.com

Meditation will actually help you

Satanic Meditation

Please, read this quote of mine



The Joy of Satan will always be here for all Satanist brothers and sisters. You can always count on us. Here the children of Satan, the true children of Satan, are truly united to ADVANCE!

May the Gods bless you!!

Thank you so much for your reply!

I need to revisit meditation. This may sound farfetched, but when I first attempted to focus on an object I "felt the light", which I guess was the presence of my soul. But from there I believed I had achieved godhood, became more and more delusional and eventually was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It has taken a long time to recover from the idea of having bipolar disorder, and I know now that my feeling of "satori" or my soul, a feeling I have never felt since and fear I may never again(!), due to my lack of knowledge and understanding I paid the price. I feel I am ready to try again now. I just don't want the feeling to override my reasoning, you know?

 

[SeguaceDiSatanas]

Thank you so much for your reply!

I need to revisit meditation. This may sound farfetched, but when I first attempted to focus on an object I "felt the light", which I guess was the presence of my soul. But from there I believed I had achieved godhood, became more and more delusional and eventually was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It has taken a long time to recover from the idea of having bipolar disorder, and I know now that my feeling of "satori" or my soul, a feeling I have never felt since and fear I may never again(!), due to my lack of knowledge and understanding I paid the price. I feel I am ready to try again now. I just don't want the feeling to override my reasoning, you know?

One piece of advice that works well in my social relationships that I can give you because I believe it works in this too is to analyze the thing in a cold and logical way, as if you were objectively evaluating the external situation. So you don't let yourself be influenced by the illusions that your mind generates. This advice is difficult to delve into, but if you understand it well I think it can help you. More objective and less involved in things when you analyze them logically.

 

[mmlozza]

One piece of advice that works well in my social relationships that I can give you because I believe it works in this too is to analyze the thing in a cold and logical way, as if you were objectively evaluating the external situation. So you don't let yourself be influenced by the illusions that your mind generates. This advice is difficult to delve into, but if you understand it well I think it can help you. More objective and less involved in things when you analyze them logically.

I think you're right there. It's so hard to unlearn the fact that external impressions are not truth, especially when similarities appear, you know? There's a tendency to overthink a lot of things.

Thank you for your input, I'm really grateful for the time. Do you have any other advice that might be useful towards practical application on this path?

 

[AFODO]

Thank you so much for your reply!

I need to revisit meditation. This may sound farfetched, but when I first attempted to focus on an object I "felt the light", which I guess was the presence of my soul. But from there I believed I had achieved godhood, became more and more delusional and eventually was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It has taken a long time to recover from the idea of having bipolar disorder, and I know now that my feeling of "satori" or my soul, a feeling I have never felt since and fear I may never again(!), due to my lack of knowledge and understanding I paid the price. I feel I am ready to try again now. I just don't want the feeling to override my reasoning, you know?

Work on sour lower chakras to be grounded, and read HPHC's sermons because these are to open your eyes up to reality.

 

[SeguaceDiSatanas]

I think you're right there. It's so hard to unlearn the fact that external impressions are not truth, especially when similarities appear, you know? There's a tendency to overthink a lot of things.

Thank you for your input, I'm really grateful for the time. Do you have any other advice that might be useful towards practical application on this path?

I think that rather than giving you other advice, it would be better if you had your own experiences, and when you make mistakes, you will recognize your ability to correct yourself and learn from the situation. I truly believe this is worth more than all the other advice I can give you.

 

[mmlozza]

Work on sour lower chakras to be grounded, and read HPHC's sermons because these are to open your eyes up to reality.

Thank you for this reply! Is there a specific link to these sermons?

 

[mmlozza]

I think that rather than giving you other advice, it would be better if you had your own experiences, and when you make mistakes, you will recognize your ability to correct yourself and learn from the situation. I truly believe this is worth more than all the other advice I can give you.

Thanks again for your replies. I guess individuality is important, and there are no right or wrong answers.

 

[mmlozza]

Work on sour lower chakras to be grounded, and read HPHC's sermons because these are to open your eyes up to reality.

Update: I've found the sermons now thanks again!

 

[AFODO]

Update: I've found the sermons now thanks again!

You can either go to the "Important Articles from JoS Ministry" forum or go to a profile and click on find, than "find all threads by xyz".