:(( :(( I WANNA DIE :((

[kidnap_ped]

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down..because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL...partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((

 

[allforenki]

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@... wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down..because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL...partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((

There should be no reason at all to feel negative/bad, AT ALL. I learned this and experienced feeling down so many times but i learned that you dont have to feel this way. Its all just negative energy and when your down, the enemy can take advantage of you and make things worse. So i learned to never be depressed no matter what the situation is, or at least handle this well.

You have to pull/drain away ALL of the negative energy within you. You do this by visualising a ball, then direct and feel the ball draining ALL of the negative energy within you. You need to will the negative energy into the ball and out of you, you have to KNOW the negative energy is leaving you. You will start feeling better as the negative energy goes away from you and into the ball. Once your all done and you no longer feel negative, store the ball somewhere for later use or try to get rid of it somehow.

Next visualise bright intense light all around, this bright light will clean your aura. Do this for a minute.

Then draw in very positive energy into you and program to make you feel happy and positive.

The Most Important thing is to do your best to ignore the past because if you think about it more, you might get depressed again and have to go through all these steps again. So try visualising (in your mind) the bad memory/thought as a roll of film, then pull all of the film (memory/bad thought) out of your mind forever! Again you have to will/KNOW that you are literally pulling the memory out of your mind for good. Once you pull it out visualise it one fire and destroy it.

Then completely ignore the memory because if you think about it long enough it will come back so just focus on other things.

I hope your advanced enough for this, this is why meditation is important. Just Know that there is no reason to feel down because you have literally get rid of the negative energy and feel better again.

If this is all too hard, do your best to pull/drain away all the negative energy until you feel better. Clean your aura as well.

Hail SATAN!

 

[blood.werewolf]

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@... wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down..because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL...partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((

I also wanted to die. I thought about suicide Every. Single. Day.
It was so because of a hard situation at home and I was being bullied on at school. Don't think that you aren't special! You really are! And you're not alone! Many of us have experienced pain and such. Some even were harassed so much by xtians that they thought about leaving Father Satan. Be strong. The pain mekes you special. Why you ask? Because you are ready now to face even harder times. What doeasn't kill you will make you stronger. You know what I do when I feel down? I cry. I cry my guts off and then cry some more. I'm never affraid to cry. Remember, you can ALWAYS find support here. Brothers and Sisters in Satan will be always there for each other

Hail Satan!

 

[akame_alex]

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@... wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down..because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL...partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((
---

Well i don't think that drinking and hitting yourself will solve something. You need to do SOMETHING. You need to start believing in yourself. I think you can try void meditation to calm yourself down...giving up isn't a way.. Sorry if it wasn't of any help , i just tried

 

[doom1n1gloom]

I too have had suicidal thoughts, and quite a few of them: Unhealthily at a somewhat early age as well. But, I found Satanism and something sort of clicked: I felt curious but I didnt want to delve too deep at first, I just sort of wanted to examine it like multi-cultural research. When I started to see the information fall into place like a puzzle, I did delve deeper, and tried some of the aura magicks(Ive had a fascination and believe in psychic abilities since childhood). I was stunned when one of my friends had already been doing this sort of thing on his own for years, and eventually my entire group of friends started using aura. I knew it was real, because without giving any indication we could tell exactly what we were doing to each other. Anyways, I believe when my psychic channels started opening, I was receiving something from Satan: Either a subconscious message or just energy, or maybe something else, and my attitude and mind seemed to take a turn for the better: I made a few realizations, or apiffanies, and set myself goals. I realize that in the universal picture life has no meaning, that its only what we make of it, and no conscious can ever comprehend the nature of existence. In other words, the answer to everything is Just Because. Things happen, people die, aspects of your life change, but theres no point in dying until you experience as much as you can in that short time.

Hope my philosophy was of help =D

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "blood.werewolf" <blood.werewolf@... wrote:

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@ wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down..because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL...partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((


I also wanted to die. I thought about suicide Every. Single. Day.
It was so because of a hard situation at home and I was being bullied on at school. Don't think that you aren't special! You really are! And you're not alone! Many of us have experienced pain and such. Some even were harassed so much by xtians that they thought about leaving Father Satan. Be strong. The pain mekes you special. Why you ask? Because you are ready now to face even harder times. What doeasn't kill you will make you stronger. You know what I do when I feel down? I cry. I cry my guts off and then cry some more. I'm never affraid to cry. Remember, you can ALWAYS find support here. Brothers and Sisters in Satan will be always there for each other

Hail Satan!

 

[David De Jager]

my email is lonely_shadow_hunter@...  add me to msn or send me an email. i may be able to help. or atleast send some comfort. my name is david by the way.

From: kidnap_ped <kidnap_ped@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, 17 July, 2009 10:49:17 PM
Subject: [Teens4Satan] ( ( I WANNA DIE (

  hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down. .because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL.. .partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((


Reading this email at work? Make a change with Yahoo!Xtra Jobs

 

[David De Jager]

what if the memories are the onlything that makes you feel like getting up in the morning?

From: allforenki <allforenki@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, 18 July, 2009 5:50:14 AM
Subject: [Teens4Satan] Re: ( ( I WANNA DIE (

 

--- In Teens4Satan@ yahoogroups. com, "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@ ... wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down. .because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL.. .partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((


There should be no reason at all to feel negative/bad, AT ALL. I learned this and experienced feeling down so many times but i learned that you dont have to feel this way. Its all just negative energy and when your down, the enemy can take advantage of you and make things worse. So i learned to never be depressed no matter what the situation is, or at least handle this well.

You have to pull/drain away ALL of the negative energy within you. You do this by visualising a ball, then direct and feel the ball draining ALL of the negative energy within you. You need to will the negative energy into the ball and out of you, you have to KNOW the negative energy is leaving you. You will start feeling better as the negative energy goes away from you and into the ball. Once your all done and you no longer feel negative, store the ball somewhere for later use or try to get rid of it somehow.

Next visualise bright intense light all around, this bright light will clean your aura. Do this for a minute.

Then draw in very positive energy into you and program to make you feel happy and positive.

The Most Important thing is to do your best to ignore the past because if you think about it more, you might get depressed again and have to go through all these steps again. So try visualising (in your mind) the bad memory/thought as a roll of film, then pull all of the film (memory/bad thought) out of your mind forever! Again you have to will/KNOW that you are literally pulling the memory out of your mind for good. Once you pull it out visualise it one fire and destroy it.

Then completely ignore the memory because if you think about it long enough it will come back so just focus on other things.

I hope your advanced enough for this, this is why meditation is important. Just Know that there is no reason to feel down because you have literally get rid of the negative energy and feel better again.

If this is all too hard, do your best to pull/drain away all the negative energy until you feel better. Clean your aura as well.

Hail SATAN!

Reading this email at work? Make a change with Yahoo!Xtra Jobs

 

[Cat Fish]

AHHHH! lucky!! I am so jealous you have friends to do it with! I had to trail along for years and wait before I found any thing out. Nothing but weather spells and meditating until this year. irritating. But oh well the wait was worth it.   Hail SATAN!

From: doom1n1gloom <doom1n1gloom@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, July 17, 2009 7:32:21 PM
Subject: [Teens4Satan] Re: ( ( I WANNA DIE (

  I too have had suicidal thoughts, and quite a few of them: Unhealthily at a somewhat early age as well. But, I found Satanism and something sort of clicked: I felt curious but I didnt want to delve too deep at first, I just sort of wanted to examine it like multi-cultural research. When I started to see the information fall into place like a puzzle, I did delve deeper, and tried some of the aura magicks(Ive had a fascination and believe in psychic abilities since childhood). I was stunned when one of my friends had already been doing this sort of thing on his own for years, and eventually my entire group of friends started using aura. I knew it was real, because without giving any indication we could tell exactly what we were doing to each other. Anyways, I believe when my psychic channels started opening, I was receiving something from Satan: Either a subconscious message or just energy, or maybe something else, and my attitude and mind seemed to take a turn for the better: I made a few realizations, or apiffanies, and set myself goals. I realize that in the universal picture life has no meaning, that its only what we make of it, and no conscious can ever comprehend the nature of existence. In other words, the answer to everything is Just Because. Things happen, people die, aspects of your life change, but theres no point in dying until you experience as much as you can in that short time.

Hope my philosophy was of help =D

--- In Teens4Satan@ yahoogroups. com, "blood.werewolf" <blood.werewolf@ ... wrote:

--- In Teens4Satan@ yahoogroups. com, "kidnap_ped" <kidnap_ped@ wrote:

hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down. .because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL.. .partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((


I also wanted to die. I thought about suicide Every. Single. Day.
It was so because of a hard situation at home and I was being bullied on at school. Don't think that you aren't special! You really are! And you're not alone! Many of us have experienced pain and such. Some even were harassed so much by xtians that they thought about leaving Father Satan. Be strong. The pain mekes you special. Why you ask? Because you are ready now to face even harder times. What doeasn't kill you will make you stronger.. You know what I do when I feel down? I cry. I cry my guts off and then cry some more. I'm never affraid to cry. Remember, you can ALWAYS find support here. Brothers and Sisters in Satan will be always there for each other

Hail Satan!

 

[kreckian_lord]

No one worry about this anymore iv helped her with this and she'll be alright.
__________________________

From: kidnap_ped <kidnap_ped@...
To: [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url]
Sent: Friday, 17 July, 2009 10:49:17 PM
Subject: [Teens4Satan] ( ( I WANNA DIE (

 
hi.
here is the problem.i feel bad..sad..down. .because of the past...something in the past happened to me and i just cant let it go..past is kinda 10 years..LOL.. .partly i can let it go coz part of it is based on xianity but part of it just me for a looooong time.
trying to be what im not for a long time was because of xians but partly face the thing that im not what i thought is kinda ( really upsetting.i thought i was special and im motherfuckin nothing...but i knew that i wasnt for whole 10 years but i lied to my own self...but now i gotta face it because of the person that i love and face that im not what i tried to be...and i made myself believe it that much that now i cant distinguish between what is a lie and whats truth...im goin insane..i constantly get drunk and hit my head at the wall..punch myself..

is there anything that can help me let it go?HELP PLEASEEE (((

 

[psychoanamull666]

I had some of the same problems,only it wasn't from sadness but a severe anger disorder where i was very unstable.However with power meditations i contain my outbursts and use it for power.Get rid of the negative energy that is very important and use power meditation to build confidence.Be determined,nothing is impossible.Most importantly,DONT KILL YOURSELF the way i kept from killing myself is i saw it as surrender.Never give in! You are special,father Satan made you and offers you power and life.take it