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I don't like myself.(Vent)

♪⛦Ivy⛦♪

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Joined
Sep 10, 2024
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I fucking hate myself. I just don't want to be here. I often think of suicide and cutting myself. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I still, to this day, struggle with self harm. I also don't like my body. I'm on antidepressants, and i'm on ADHD meds. I don't know whats going on. Does anyone have any tips for me? I really want to kill myself but I just can't bring myself to die.
 
I fucking hate myself. I just don't want to be here. I often think of suicide and cutting myself. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I still, to this day, struggle with self harm. I also don't like my body. I'm on antidepressants, and i'm on ADHD meds. I don't know whats going on. Does anyone have any tips for me? I really want to kill myself but I just can't bring myself to die.

Please see the other thread where I left a reply. It is very likely you are having a response to the trauma you had experienced, which then "bubbles out" and manifests psychologically in these ways. None of this is your fault that it occurred to you, but ultimately, you are the only one who can heal yourself.

If you cannot bring yourself to love yourself, at least give yourself a chance to heal, which takes time but will happen, and this will allow the realization(s) of newfound hope and aspirations through which you will then base your desire to live around.
 
I spent every minute of every hour of everyday for the last 14 years in pain. Literally! If someone told me one day I wouldn't even remember the feeling of being depressed i would have punched him in the face. Well I don't remember It :) meditate, dedicate yourself to Father Satanas, and not only one day you will be alright, but you will find again that spark that you had when you were a child. I know you miss it.. we all did.
 
I fucking hate myself. I just don't want to be here. I often think of suicide and cutting myself. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I still, to this day, struggle with self harm. I also don't like my body. I'm on antidepressants, and i'm on ADHD meds. I don't know whats going on. Does anyone have any tips for me? I really want to kill myself but I just can't bring myself to die.

You want to gradually learn to love and care for your body and yourself. You are the only one like you in the whole universe, and you can just develop and work on yourself over time and this will help cultivate this and help these negative feelings and tendencies.

The spiritual practices, self development, and just a strong tendency and routine for advancement will over time negate and minimize these feelings. Strongly clean your aura, chakras and soul, and just keep at it. It can take some time until ones mental health improves when suffering from these sorts of maladies, it can be very gradual.

For healing from mental health issues and trauma, the WUNJO Rune can be very strong for this, along with the SATANAMA Mantra.

Hang in there, it will be okay. We are all here for you, and so is Father Satanas and the Gods. :)
 
I fucking hate myself. I just don't want to be here. I often think of suicide and cutting myself. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I still, to this day, struggle with self harm. I also don't like my body. I'm on antidepressants, and i'm on ADHD meds. I don't know whats going on. Does anyone have any tips for me? I really want to kill myself but I just can't bring myself to die.

Can I ask you something?
I know that you think you deserve hate and pain, and that you would like to commit suicide because you feel wrong and that existing is a harm. I know.
But can I ask you...

Why if you really are just something wrong here and deserve hate do you think that Satan, when he decided to reincarnate those who have been with him in the past, decided to reincarnate you as well if it were true that you are a burden in this world? And why do you think that if you really deserve hate and pain, he made you come here, on JoS, in a place where you will be given a helping hand to get better and that definition deals as a support to the growth of your person?

Why do you think Satan has taken care of you? I don't think Satan can't recognize who deserves love and who doesn't. I think more that it is the people who have mistreated you who don't know how to do that.
 
I fucking hate myself. I just don't want to be here. I often think of suicide and cutting myself. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I still, to this day, struggle with self harm. I also don't like my body. I'm on antidepressants, and i'm on ADHD meds. I don't know whats going on. Does anyone have any tips for me? I really want to kill myself but I just can't bring myself to die.
I, can relate. I have those days. And I know that pain pretty well too.
And, there are many times I feel like a failure. And still keep trying,
It's ,not easy, being human in a world that hates.
Sometimes, I wonder if I'm retarded. Because, of the way most people treat me And judge me. And I, know we all have our problems. Nobody is perfect. We all have our challenges to face, And that Sometimes, stops me on my tracks. Where i wonder, if I'm worth anything at all or not?
And, You have to tell yourself that you're lucky to be alive, And That you are priceless. Because nobody, knows what you're suffering, From within.
And how you, cope with it every day. People, really don't know who we are in the flesh. People are not mine readers, But they have fun assuming things, You make your mistakes, you get called names and run down.
No matter, How hard you try. I get it. This world is a challenge and it's takes guts, backbone and courage to get up in the mornings. And look at yourself, in the mirror And tell yourself that you're beautiful and that you're worth it. And learn to make a habit of it. Because, Deep
Down you are worth it. And you know you are. Learning how to accept yourself is not easy. Getting used to your own skin is not easy for some.
Especially if we made poor choices. And I have made many threw out my past. And i've, overcome a lot of problems and struggles along the way.
And learn to find strength in myself. In spite of open nonsense that goes on in this world. You just have to be strong. And push yourself, dear and keep going. And never give up. Because you are beautiful! And you know your smart. And never let Anybody put you down. And I am here if you, want someone to talk to. 💗🙂
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Shaitan

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