Your condition of suffering compared to your natural gender is revered to the characteristics of the gender with which you identify.
There are qualities of the Venusian, feminine energetic nature, and it is completely natural, normal and healthy that a man can orient himself towards these qualities in his being and identify with them. The same is valid for women.
Attributing this condition of suffering to your biological gender is unfortunately a natural possible reaction, derived from enemy propaganda on which the founding concepts of a society are established.
Satan doesn't need you to be punished, Satan does not want you to suffer any more, or feel inadequate.
Satan takes your hand to the attainment of your nature.
The Spiritual Satanist has the right to free himself from all illusions and limitations, discover his own nature and act according to his own tendencies.
By meditating you will have the opportunity to face your memories and your feelings.
Returning Curses Part 1 and 2
Words of Power - Freeing the Soul
Specificity with Workings and Affirmations
I strongly advise you to work on your sacral chakra. Vibrate RAUM, SURYAE, ANSUZ or URUZ in it, ×7 repetitions. It is a daily working. After the 7 repetitions affirm that your sacral chakra is completely purified and that you are returning all the curses and negative energies connected to it back to the senders.
Search information about all these mantras on the main site. Use what you feel it is working best for you.
Be blessed