AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
I will try to give as much details as I can so we can hopefully make some sense from this.
The issue I need some help with is the excessive daydreaming and being a literal NPC throughout entirity of my day, unless sleeping, obviously....I cannot focus on something for more than 5 seconds before going back to NPC daydreaming mode!!
I will explain a bit more about it.
It all started few years ago, cannot give specific time as back then I wasn't paying too much attention to it and it literally stabbed me in the back.
As I moved alot during my childhood, I didn't have many friends so I don't know how it all started, but I started imagining myself around good friends and people. For some reason, it felt good, to let go of this world and just have my own imaginary one, so bit by bit, I started doing it more, like talking to random people, making up random stories, writing and doing my own music, whatever...
And not until last 2 years has it really gotten to the point where I can no longer control it, like I mentioned, it only takes me less than 5 seconds of either focusing, thinking, studying, WHATEVER REQUIRES ME TO DO SOMETHING FOR LONGER PERIODS OF TIME, and in my mind I am completely gone. It releases so much dopamine that it is difficult to snap back to present unless someone startles or slaps me. It's like, my vision gets slightly blurry, or like when you start seeing double, and in that moment I am gone. It happens literally, and I mean literally, throughout entirity of my day. I cannot sit and relax to let go of this state, I cannot do something else to not focus on this state. I have started to forget words and formulate sentences properly during communications and it just feels like I won't be able to think anymore.
And as I can already tell people will start commenting that I have to do void medition, like, how?.....
Like I said, my mind is insanely active and in less than 5 seconds of focusing, in this case, on nothing, my mind goes absolutely everywhere.
Not to mention constant overthinking, random thoughts, daydreaming, like, all the perfect ingredients to make a person lose his mind, literally.
I will add that I stress very easily, thanks to my stupidly easily sensitive body to all the noise around which makes me constantly hot inside my body, but if I start writing about that too, it will be a whole another rant.
So yes, I am getting to the point where soon I won't even be able to think properly (or that is already happening), but to the point where I will just totally lose my perception of what is real and what is not.
Even now, as I try to re-read my thread, as this is something that requires me to read and stay focused for longer period of time, it happens yet again when I get to the point of being npc and my brain releasing so much dopamine. It is just difficult to snap out of it..
This is by far, my biggest problem ever which I would love to clear as it is honestly messing up my work, studies, meditations, relationships, everything...
All this overthinking and active mind makes me so mentally drained all the time.
I do believe the freeing of soul would help on upcoming Samhain, but I don't know where to focus on the energies. I can't just focus on my mind, I want to target the core of the problem.
If it helps, my chart is dominated by fire element supported by air. I eat and sleep well, exercise ocasionally (not the greatest but I do move a lot during my day), don't smoke or even drink. So even if I have a healthy life, I still seem to have quite weak mental health.
The issue I need some help with is the excessive daydreaming and being a literal NPC throughout entirity of my day, unless sleeping, obviously....I cannot focus on something for more than 5 seconds before going back to NPC daydreaming mode!!
I will explain a bit more about it.
It all started few years ago, cannot give specific time as back then I wasn't paying too much attention to it and it literally stabbed me in the back.
As I moved alot during my childhood, I didn't have many friends so I don't know how it all started, but I started imagining myself around good friends and people. For some reason, it felt good, to let go of this world and just have my own imaginary one, so bit by bit, I started doing it more, like talking to random people, making up random stories, writing and doing my own music, whatever...
And not until last 2 years has it really gotten to the point where I can no longer control it, like I mentioned, it only takes me less than 5 seconds of either focusing, thinking, studying, WHATEVER REQUIRES ME TO DO SOMETHING FOR LONGER PERIODS OF TIME, and in my mind I am completely gone. It releases so much dopamine that it is difficult to snap back to present unless someone startles or slaps me. It's like, my vision gets slightly blurry, or like when you start seeing double, and in that moment I am gone. It happens literally, and I mean literally, throughout entirity of my day. I cannot sit and relax to let go of this state, I cannot do something else to not focus on this state. I have started to forget words and formulate sentences properly during communications and it just feels like I won't be able to think anymore.
And as I can already tell people will start commenting that I have to do void medition, like, how?.....
Like I said, my mind is insanely active and in less than 5 seconds of focusing, in this case, on nothing, my mind goes absolutely everywhere.
Not to mention constant overthinking, random thoughts, daydreaming, like, all the perfect ingredients to make a person lose his mind, literally.
I will add that I stress very easily, thanks to my stupidly easily sensitive body to all the noise around which makes me constantly hot inside my body, but if I start writing about that too, it will be a whole another rant.
So yes, I am getting to the point where soon I won't even be able to think properly (or that is already happening), but to the point where I will just totally lose my perception of what is real and what is not.
Even now, as I try to re-read my thread, as this is something that requires me to read and stay focused for longer period of time, it happens yet again when I get to the point of being npc and my brain releasing so much dopamine. It is just difficult to snap out of it..
This is by far, my biggest problem ever which I would love to clear as it is honestly messing up my work, studies, meditations, relationships, everything...
All this overthinking and active mind makes me so mentally drained all the time.
I do believe the freeing of soul would help on upcoming Samhain, but I don't know where to focus on the energies. I can't just focus on my mind, I want to target the core of the problem.
If it helps, my chart is dominated by fire element supported by air. I eat and sleep well, exercise ocasionally (not the greatest but I do move a lot during my day), don't smoke or even drink. So even if I have a healthy life, I still seem to have quite weak mental health.
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