What causes deep addiction?

[MercuryWisdom]

Hey my satanic brothers and sisters,

I've a problem with porn addiction...
I've watched porn for years now. Since my childhood. It has only gotten more depraved and fucked up through the years.

I am a very sexual person and have an 8th house stellium which gives me much sexual power and potential. But my mind is so deep into porn.

I've done a porn addiction working with Ansuz and Uruz and have done really well until I started relapsing and getting worse. Today is my last day in the 40 day working and I keep relapsing.

The whole time through the working I would get dreams about porn, pornstars and so much ugly shit that I can't take it anymore.

Through the working the thoughts would intensify and keep me awake at night and testing my discipline and will power.

I just feel tired, stuck, and pessimistic about all of this shit with porn.

I don't want to give in to porn and I don't want to keep thinking, obsessing, and fighting my erections.

I've been successfully able to masturbate to my demoness lover during this working as my porn-induced erectile dysfunction has went away after a while. But that wasn't enough for me to stop dreaming, or thinking about porn.

How the fuck can I escape this vicious cycle forever?

Fortunately this is my only addiction. I am grateful I never got and never will get into real destructive shit like drugs, alchohol, or weed as my obsessive nature wouldn't have survived it. I also like to care about my health and improve myself so I didn't get into those shit.

What can I do now? Start another working or what? I just feel so drained.

 

[NinRick]

I can not really relate here, can I?
When I don’t like anything, I just stop.
So maybe.. just stop watching porn?
After a while, the thoughts should vanish.

Void meditation my friend.

I don’t really think that this is a spiritual thing, just prove a strong will and common sense.

Good luck!

 

[Blitzkreig [JG]]

...

It sounds like the working is sort of pushing the problem to the surface, so to speak. Maybe aura cleaning would heal with this, idk.

Either way, you just have to keep putting energy into the working until it is over. Each day you do the working, a small step forward is made, even if it may not appear like that initially. From what I can tell, it sounds like you are on your way to breaking this cycle.

In many ways porn is like a stimulating video game in that it is almost like entertainment more than it is sexuality. It basically hijacks the sexual functioning of your being and redirects it to be all visually-oriented. With this in mind, it can be hard to replace it when you do not have access to a physical partner, although not impossible. This is because any substitute will not be as stimulating, but the brain will still eventually adapt.

Besides a working geared towards breaking the addiction, one can also use a working to make them repulsed by something, thereby never able to re-engage the addiction. Porn is not something like Youtube where it could possibly be good or possibly bad. In this sense you can be freely repel it without worry.

Just as you may have a disgust for cigarette smoking or other bad behavior, you can cultivate that same feeling towards anything, if you so desire. If you first break the addiction, then generate disgust or even a repulsive obstacle towards the addiction, it will be much hard to re-establish. I think Munka has a reflective property to it, but I am not sure.

Anyway, just keep going and keep trying. You have to keep going until it is stamped out and no more relevant than your addictions to alcohol, which is to say non-existent.

For me, personally, I had done 40 days with Munka, but I think I need to do it again. I can easily resist watching videos of porn, but games and images still tempt me, especially on bad days. It is like halfway broken, yet the progress that was made it stable. It just has to be done to completion.

 

[Korpi]

Perhaps this could help?
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=44987&#p203405

 

[Hp. Hoodedcobra666]

Unsatisfied energetic needs. Porn does not fix these by the way, only meditation can and might.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

I apologise if this question is rude, but are you doing meditation and yoga consistently? Like at least twice a day each?

Before I found JoS, pornographic material was a way for me to artifically become aroused, which allowed me to briefly raise my energy levels. Although afterwards it would slip right away, making it kind of pointless. But that brief rush of energy was somewhat addictive for me.

Since my issue at the time was really energy deficiency and a lack of natural arousal, meditation and yoga made pornographic material completely obsolete since they helped me so much with both, especially when done consistently.

I don't know if your case is similar at all, but that's why I figured I should ask if you're diligent enough with those things, just in case.
Especially since you mentioned feeling drained, which could be a sign of energy deficiency.

Hey, Meteor,
Yes, I've been meditating and doing yoga daily for about 3 months now. They have been beyond wonderful and saved my life from decay and neptunian insanity. Now I am much more sensitive to my soul. I can feel my chakras. So when I watch porn I feel the filth that goes on my chakras. That's why I don't like it as much anymore. This kind of filth is very hard to clean.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

I can not really relate here, can I?
When I don’t like anything, I just stop.
So maybe.. just stop watching porn?
After a while, the thoughts should vanish.

Void meditation my friend.

I don’t really think that this is a spiritual thing, just prove a strong will and common sense.

Good luck!

Hey, NinRick,
An addiction goes much deeper than that. If I don't like social media I delete it and can remove it for weeks or months. If I don't like videogames I don't play it.

But porn for me goes much deeper than that. It depends on the character and the natal chart what you can get addicted to mine is sex. I applaud you for net getting addicted to anything yet. As they can be highly destructive.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

...

It sounds like the working is sort of pushing the problem to the surface, so to speak. Maybe aura cleaning would heal with this, idk.

Either way, you just have to keep putting energy into the working until it is over. Each day you do the working, a small step forward is made, even if it may not appear like that initially. From what I can tell, it sounds like you are on your way to breaking this cycle.

In many ways porn is like a stimulating video game in that it is almost like entertainment more than it is sexuality. It basically hijacks the sexual functioning of your being and redirects it to be all visually-oriented. With this in mind, it can be hard to replace it when you do not have access to a physical partner, although not impossible. This is because any substitute will not be as stimulating, but the brain will still eventually adapt.

Besides a working geared towards breaking the addiction, one can also use a working to make them repulsed by something, thereby never able to re-engage the addiction. Porn is not something like Youtube where it could possibly be good or possibly bad. In this sense you can be freely repel it without worry.

Just as you may have a disgust for cigarette smoking or other bad behavior, you can cultivate that same feeling towards anything, if you so desire. If you first break the addiction, then generate disgust or even a repulsive obstacle towards the addiction, it will be much hard to re-establish. I think Munka has a reflective property to it, but I am not sure.

Anyway, just keep going and keep trying. You have to keep going until it is stamped out and no more relevant than your addictions to alcohol, which is to say non-existent.

For me, personally, I had done 40 days with Munka, but I think I need to do it again. I can easily resist watching videos of porn, but games and images still tempt me, especially on bad days. It is like halfway broken, yet the progress that was made it stable. It just has to be done to completion.

Hey, Blitzkreig,
Thanks for the advice! I've finished my 40 day working yesterday. Should I do re-do it or I am thinking to extend it for 90 days. What do you think?

 

[darkmonkey666]

The only way really to fix this is relax a little and get over whatever hang ups you have about sexuality and whatever your unsatisfied about and using porn for. Maybe a different style of working might work here. If your relaxed more so then you really should think whatever about it and not be attracted to viewing it at all. There goes your addiction. Try to find a partner maybe too and you won't enjoy porn as it's a pale comparison.

 

[luis]

Unsatisfied energetic needs. Porn does not fix these by the way, only meditation can and might.

As someone with a strong sex drive I understand OP. For me its just one planet in my 8 house, I cannot immagine what is like to have a stellium there. Meditation helped me but I do need to find someone to have sex with, as an SS this is kinda difficult but its my fault that I have yet to do a spell to attract a good partner.

Something that can help is to do the square for at least one of the planet that gives you this sex drive. A working to unblock your sacral chakra with Thurisaz and/or the Mars square to unblock the sacral chakra. Sex drive is very strong so it may take you more than one working. A daily affirmation for getting rid of the addiction on top of the other workings may help too. You have to go all in with the workings if you want to get rid of it. A partner may help with the addiction or may not, it depends. For me I think it can help for example for my high sex drive.

 

[Aquarius]

Through my experience and understanding, what makes people of this age aroused to porn is the shock factor they have programmed you to be aroused of, it's a very superficial way of brain stimulus. You'll notice how the jews always make incest porn, and people go to it, but that's not because people like incest, but because of the shock factor that it gives, sort of like a "taboo", nobody sane in the mind is attracted to incest.
You'll notice you're not even gaining pleasure, your penis might be numb but still hard, everything is happening in the brain, that's the complete opposite of a healthy masturbation, in which you feel a lot of pleasure in your whole body.
If I may suggest, find yourself a partner and have sex, you'll quickly notice how porn has affected you.

 

[Henu the Great]

Start another working or what? I just feel so drained.

Do a working for 90 or 120 days and do kundalini yoga, hatha yoga, and pranyama every day without fail. Also empoweing meditations like raum meditation will help.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Start another working or what? I just feel so drained.

Do a working for 90 or 120 days and do kundalini yoga, hatha yoga, and pranyama every day without fail. Also empoweing meditations like raum meditation will help.

Okay Henu. Thanks for the advice!

I was doing this working for 40 days I will just extend it to be 90 days now.

I am doing yoga and meditation daily now for over 3 months without fail and it's been wonderful.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Unsatisfied energetic needs. Porn does not fix these by the way, only meditation can and might.

As someone with a strong sex drive I understand OP. For me its just one planet in my 8 house, I cannot immagine what is like to have a stellium there. Meditation helped me but I do need to find someone to have sex with, as an SS this is kinda difficult but its my fault that I have yet to do a spell to attract a good partner.

Something that can help is to do the square for at least one of the planet that gives you this sex drive. A working to unblock your sacral chakra with Thurisaz and/or the Mars square to unblock the sacral chakra. Sex drive is very strong so it may take you more than one working. A daily affirmation for getting rid of the addiction on top of the other workings may help too. You have to go all in with the workings if you want to get rid of it. A partner may help with the addiction or may not, it depends. For me I think it can help for example for my high sex drive.

Hey, Luis,

It was a relief to read that someone understands how 8th house feels haha. It is a wild ride but my 8th house planets are my favourite astrological aspects as they give a focused mind, magickal talent and powerful sex drive wich is very beneficial once mastered.

I am trying my best to master it now. I will have to be immensely strong here.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Through my experience and understanding, what makes people of this age aroused to porn is the shock factor they have programmed you to be aroused of, it's a very superficial way of brain stimulus. You'll notice how the jews always make incest porn, and people go to it, but that's not because people like incest, but because of the shock factor that it gives, sort of like a "taboo", nobody sane in the mind is attracted to incest.
You'll notice you're not even gaining pleasure, your penis might be numb but still hard, everything is happening in the brain, that's the complete opposite of a healthy masturbation, in which you feel a lot of pleasure in your whole body.
If I may suggest, find yourself a partner and have sex, you'll quickly notice how porn has affected you.

Yeah I agree with you Aquarius.

I've noticed porn gives very subpar, almost non-existent orgasms. Which doesn't help because you are never satisfied with it.

It is like drinking sea water when you are incredibly thirsty. No matter how much you drink it is not enough and makes you even more thirsty.

 

[Blitzkreig [JG]]

Hey, Blitzkreig,
Thanks for the advice! I've finished my 40 day working yesterday. Should I do re-do it or I am thinking to extend it for 90 days. What do you think?

I would just extend it. You will be able to judge perhaps by the 30th (a better date for a new working) if you need to restart it or not.

 

[13th_Wolf]

Through my experience and understanding, what makes people of this age aroused to porn is the shock factor they have programmed you to be aroused of, it's a very superficial way of brain stimulus. You'll notice how the jews always make incest porn, and people go to it, but that's not because people like incest, but because of the shock factor that it gives, sort of like a "taboo", nobody sane in the mind is attracted to incest.
You'll notice you're not even gaining pleasure, your penis might be numb but still hard, everything is happening in the brain, that's the complete opposite of a healthy masturbation, in which you feel a lot of pleasure in your whole body.
If I may suggest, find yourself a partner and have sex, you'll quickly notice how porn has affected you.

Sex should be a bit like a dance shouldn't it? I remember being really energetic at dancing, before I got heavily into that shit, now I haven't bothered for years.

The shock factor of watching porn hit me at 9 years old. They can't sexually abuse most children anymore so they do find other ways to push the bs through.

Anyway.

Mfw I'm a Spiritual Satanist:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[Blackdragon666]

Through my experience and understanding, what makes people of this age aroused to porn is the shock factor they have programmed you to be aroused of, it's a very superficial way of brain stimulus. You'll notice how the jews always make incest porn, and people go to it, but that's not because people like incest, but because of the shock factor that it gives, sort of like a "taboo", nobody sane in the mind is attracted to incest.
You'll notice you're not even gaining pleasure, your penis might be numb but still hard, everything is happening in the brain, that's the complete opposite of a healthy masturbation, in which you feel a lot of pleasure in your whole body.
If I may suggest, find yourself a partner and have sex, you'll quickly notice how porn has affected you.

I second this. Find a healthy sex partner and have adequate sex and it may help you overcome the porn.

 

[Cinammonroll]

An act of watching porn is a very irrational think as it serves no purpose. You just need to use power of you own will and simply chose to not pursue this specific action.
You should better yourself in Void meditation to ground yourself and be able to induce that state from VM every time you get impulses to watch porn.

With time those specific thought should fade into oblivion every time they appear.

It's kinda like with OCD.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

I apologise if this question is rude, but are you doing meditation and yoga consistently? Like at least twice a day each?

Before I found JoS, pornographic material was a way for me to artifically become aroused, which allowed me to briefly raise my energy levels. Although afterwards it would slip right away, making it kind of pointless. But that brief rush of energy was somewhat addictive for me.

Since my issue at the time was really energy deficiency and a lack of natural arousal, meditation and yoga made pornographic material completely obsolete since they helped me so much with both, especially when done consistently.

I don't know if your case is similar at all, but that's why I figured I should ask if you're diligent enough with those things, just in case.
Especially since you mentioned feeling drained, which could be a sign of energy deficiency.

Hey, Meteor,
Yes, I've been meditating and doing yoga daily for about 3 months now. They have been beyond wonderful and saved my life from decay and neptunian insanity. Now I am much more sensitive to my soul. I can feel my chakras. So when I watch porn I feel the filth that goes on my chakras. That's why I don't like it as much anymore. This kind of filth is very hard to clean.

I think you're on the right track to overcoming this. Remember the unpleasant feeling you get in your chakras and let it deter you. You can't be doing that kind of thing if you want to be clean and feel good!
Good luck! You can do it!

Thanks for the support Meteor!

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Thanks for the support everyone! I am not going to give up when you have my backs like this!

 

[The Jackal]

I still don't understand how can porn addiction be a thing. Just use visualization dude. :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[Username]

Whenever you get the urge to watch porn, face the desire head on with sheer willpower.
Subdue it and move on with your day.

Once this cycle repeats enough time, before you know it, you have full control over the urge.
Its okay to trip sometimes, that's fine. Just get right back up afterwards.
However, persistence to gain control over your urges should reward you in many ways than just being free of porn addiction.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Whenever you get the urge to watch porn, face the desire head on with sheer willpower.
Subdue it and move on with your day.

Once this cycle repeats enough time, before you know it, you have full control over the urge.
Its okay to trip sometimes, that's fine. Just get right back up afterwards.
However, persistence to gain control over your urges should reward you in many ways than just being free of porn addiction.

Thanks for this!

 

[luis]

Whenever you get the urge to watch porn, face the desire head on with sheer willpower.
Subdue it and move on with your day.

Once this cycle repeats enough time, before you know it, you have full control over the urge.
Its okay to trip sometimes, that's fine. Just get right back up afterwards.
However, persistence to gain control over your urges should reward you in many ways than just being free of porn addiction.

Thanks for this!

You need to find out what is the reason you want to watch porn, is it just addiction because it feels good or is it something else? For me it was high libido plus the need of a boyfriend.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Whenever you get the urge to watch porn, face the desire head on with sheer willpower.
Subdue it and move on with your day.

Once this cycle repeats enough time, before you know it, you have full control over the urge.
Its okay to trip sometimes, that's fine. Just get right back up afterwards.
However, persistence to gain control over your urges should reward you in many ways than just being free of porn addiction.

Thanks for this!

You need to find out what is the reason you want to watch porn, is it just addiction because it feels good or is it something else? For me it was high libido plus the need of a boyfriend.

It is because of the intense mental stimulation in porn. My 8th house mercury needs mental stimulation in sex and masturbation.

So there is millions of porn categories and stuff filled with intense mental stimulation and pleasure. This got me really hooked and built a connection to porn which I am so trying so hard to break.

But something deep inside just doesn't want to overcome porn which is sabotaging me trying to overcome it.

Like literally porn is my only and biggest problem right now I am trying so hard to fight it. But when I get this pre-watching porn horniness my mind is constantly tricking me to give up.

The problem isn't just with watching porn. The problem is the amount of depraved porn I watch while I don't really want to watch.

So yeah, it is a struggle...

 

[luis]

Thanks for this!

You need to find out what is the reason you want to watch porn, is it just addiction because it feels good or is it something else? For me it was high libido plus the need of a boyfriend.

It is because of the intense mental stimulation in porn. My 8th house mercury needs mental stimulation in sex and masturbation.

So there is millions of porn categories and stuff filled with intense mental stimulation and pleasure. This got me really hooked and built a connection to porn which I am so trying so hard to break.

But something deep inside just doesn't want to overcome porn which is sabotaging me trying to overcome it.

Like literally porn is my only and biggest problem right now I am trying so hard to fight it. But when I get this pre-watching porn horniness my mind is constantly tricking me to give up.

The problem isn't just with watching porn. The problem is the amount of depraved porn I watch while I don't really want to watch.

So yeah, it is a struggle...

I'm sorry, my problem was different so I can't really help you more than I did. Do the mercury square or just the mantra for 40 days or more to eliminate the negative aspects of your natal mercury. Make sure to do an affirmation everyday to get rid of the addiction. I know what you mean when you say that there is something inside you that does not want to get rid of the problem, that is the addiction that is so strong that is "talking" to you and making you not want to do anything. This is why you need to keep doing an affirmation and program your mind that you are healed from the addiction. Good luck brother

 

[Sundara]

Use regular affirmations towards desiring a real sexual/romantic connection with someone, and really mean it. Think about having a real connection with someone often and reason it through your mind that this is better than porn, because it is. Work on the insecurities towards real sex porn creates, study up on it, it sounds like you’re making progress even if it’s a long road. Sexual related obsessions aren’t the only thing that come from the lower region. I’ve noticed this is where my urge to vape and fall into silly patterns comes from. Sexual energy is “obsessive” in nature for a lack of a better word and truly loving what’s good for you and loving yourself is a strong resolve. I’m a woman so I’m not sure how it differs but I get highly sexual when I am feeling low in my life, or after a break up. Being secure and settled and connected with myself and others helps. It’s not necessarily found within others but found in self security. Addictions have to do with obsessive qualities and impulsive urges, as well as low self esteem. Lower powered throat chakra or Venus issues. It’s not always a problem and I prefer to take the energy out in bed with another person because internalizing it in the past has been more damaging personally. Forcing myself to not be with another person for the sake of working myself hasn’t really had any positive affect in the past but even when I’m not looking for a relationship I don’t just throw myself around to crap people. It could be negative to do that if a person is just sleeping around with who ever whenever just for a thrill. There’s got to be genuine actions there or a person could be disgusted in their impulsive choices. I personally think it helps to figure out what you really like in a person, at least a baseline, and go from there. Being too picky when it comes to just sexual relations can be damaging. I definitely have been and I just suppressed myself in that regard. Venus related workings may help you as well. These helped me. When I did Mars workings it only increased issues. Urges to have alcohol, urges to just have too much fun and disregard more important things.

 

[Username]

I don't know if I should say this.
Try to channel your sexual feelings up through the base chakra all the way to the crown.
This should help you dissipate your sexual feelings.
Just imagine all the sexual feelings going up through your spine.

Also, hope your chakras are correctly aligned.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

Use regular affirmations towards desiring a real sexual/romantic connection with someone, and really mean it. Think about having a real connection with someone often and reason it through your mind that this is better than porn, because it is. Work on the insecurities towards real sex porn creates, study up on it, it sounds like you’re making progress even if it’s a long road. Sexual related obsessions aren’t the only thing that come from the lower region. I’ve noticed this is where my urge to vape and fall into silly patterns comes from. Sexual energy is “obsessive” in nature for a lack of a better word and truly loving what’s good for you and loving yourself is a strong resolve. I’m a woman so I’m not sure how it differs but I get highly sexual when I am feeling low in my life, or after a break up. Being secure and settled and connected with myself and others helps. It’s not necessarily found within others but found in self security. Addictions have to do with obsessive qualities and impulsive urges, as well as low self esteem. Lower powered throat chakra or Venus issues. It’s not always a problem and I prefer to take the energy out in bed with another person because internalizing it in the past has been more damaging personally. Forcing myself to not be with another person for the sake of working myself hasn’t really had any positive affect in the past but even when I’m not looking for a relationship I don’t just throw myself around to crap people. It could be negative to do that if a person is just sleeping around with who ever whenever just for a thrill. There’s got to be genuine actions there or a person could be disgusted in their impulsive choices. I personally think it helps to figure out what you really like in a person, at least a baseline, and go from there. Being too picky when it comes to just sexual relations can be damaging. I definitely have been and I just suppressed myself in that regard. Venus related workings may help you as well. These helped me. When I did Mars workings it only increased issues. Urges to have alcohol, urges to just have too much fun and disregard more important things.

Thanks for the info and advice, Sundara! I have a monogamous succubus which I absolutely love. So I don't need a partner. I already got one.

 

[Alexandros Iowno [JG]]

I think no one mentioned a big part of what assembles an addiction and attachment and that is lack of experience and immaturity. Growing in any part of life does give off maturity and choices to apply yourself. Lack of experience and choice does make the body and mind conform to mediocrity and undesire to change, stagnate in lethargy.

 

[Camila Javiera]

Hi there.

My reply is late, but I am writing it because something occurred to me. You could replace pornography with anime hentai or reading erotic stories. Maybe train the imagination and reject the visual. I apologize if my comment is wrong.

 

[Aquarius]

anime hentai

Replace degeneracy with other degeneracy? haha
As for erotic novels, I don't know much, but I believe people should develop their own sexuality, and with erotic novels you get off to other people's sexuality.

 

[darkmonkey666]

Hi there.

My reply is late, but I am writing it because something occurred to me. You could replace pornography with anime hentai or reading erotic stories. Maybe train the imagination and reject the visual. I apologize if my comment is wrong.

Yeah this or some people in stuff i read found helpful using more natural erotica pictures and imagination then getting used to using imagination so they don't use that anymore. This could work cause it uses the same principal.

The other thing to think about is maybe porn is spiritual rape? Maybe so think about this. You are seeing someone as an object or possession. There is no consent you are sending energies and receiving energies from this.

The way a lot of guys go into this I would not hesitate to classify it as this. Maybe punishable offense in the future. Think about it.

 

[xlnt]

I think porn addiction is much rooted in anxiety and insecurity, which the orgasm helps to calm down. Maybe go and talk to some therapist IRL about possible inner unrest that may be part of the cause of this addiction. Being occupied with other things is also good, and staying away from situations that will make you relapse.
For me it was usually when I was sitting up late and being tired that this addiction was the hardest to fight against, so sleep and rest, meditation, excercise etc. is also good off course.
And I also know of something which has helped me a lot with this issue, and that helps to bring comfort and peace inside but I'll keep that to myself on this forum at least. Good luck anyways.

 

[magus.immortalis]

I read through the posts in this thread, and since it was not mentioned, I thought I'd suggest seeing a therapist if you are comfortable talking about your addiction. You are not the only one with a sex or porn addiction, and perhaps talking it out might help you discover more about yourself and the root of your addiction.

There are online forums that may address these problems. And Reddit. You can talk freely and anonymously there about more explicit details (you did mention you watch depraved porn) and also hear and read other people's points and issues with this.
Knowing you're not going through this alone and there are others in the same boat.

If you don't want to do the therapist route, you can talk with your monogamous demon lover and work together to gently find a solution(s) for you to try out. Bonus points that you two draw closer. And they know how much to gently push you to talk, and what your limits are for that day/night, and when you're ready to talk about it again. I sometimes start crying when I start talking about my problems with my Demon spouse and it's sort of healing and cathartic.

 

[MercuryWisdom]

I read through the posts in this thread, and since it was not mentioned, I thought I'd suggest seeing a therapist if you are comfortable talking about your addiction. You are not the only one with a sex or porn addiction, and perhaps talking it out might help you discover more about yourself and the root of your addiction.

There are online forums that may address these problems. And Reddit. You can talk freely and anonymously there about more explicit details (you did mention you watch depraved porn) and also hear and read other people's points and issues with this.
Knowing you're not going through this alone and there are others in the same boat.

If you don't want to do the therapist route, you can talk with your monogamous demon lover and work together to gently find a solution(s) for you to try out. Bonus points that you two draw closer. And they know how much to gently push you to talk, and what your limits are for that day/night, and when you're ready to talk about it again. I sometimes start crying when I start talking about my problems with my Demon spouse and it's sort of healing and cathartic.

I would rather not go to a therapist and wouldn't recommend it for an SS. Lots or even most therapists are jews nowadays. Also if I am going to let my feelings out I would want to say everything. Not much people or even therapists would be comfortable with a spiritual satanist patient who has a demoness lover. A therapist would be actually shook and would think I am mentally ill just for being an atheist in my country. It's illegal to be an atheist. This advice doesn't apply to me at all.

About talking with my lover. Yes it helps. But I tend to avoid it unconciously. As I cry and burst and this is not always comfortable. But when I do talk to her it's always a nice and beautiful experience. I just need to gather the courage and just talk with her sometimes.

But also currently I am doing a 90-day working which is very powerful and liberating. I am also much closer to my lover. It's a process and I am making progress.

Hail Satan!

 

[magus.immortalis]

I read through the posts in this thread, and since it was not mentioned, I thought I'd suggest seeing a therapist if you are comfortable talking about your addiction. You are not the only one with a sex or porn addiction, and perhaps talking it out might help you discover more about yourself and the root of your addiction.

There are online forums that may address these problems. And Reddit. You can talk freely and anonymously there about more explicit details (you did mention you watch depraved porn) and also hear and read other people's points and issues with this.
Knowing you're not going through this alone and there are others in the same boat.

If you don't want to do the therapist route, you can talk with your monogamous demon lover and work together to gently find a solution(s) for you to try out. Bonus points that you two draw closer. And they know how much to gently push you to talk, and what your limits are for that day/night, and when you're ready to talk about it again. I sometimes start crying when I start talking about my problems with my Demon spouse and it's sort of healing and cathartic.

This advice doesn't apply to me at all.

Well, I did my best here. Perhaps it might help someone else.

Take care.