Aldrick said:
Well let's just look at the facts here. Some random person finds us back in Novemeber. Makes an account, puts up an Anime pic, almost like he knew people did that here. But whatever, joins a Satanic Nazi organization, a few months later follows around a username trying to prove we are all sheep.
Now you tell me. What am I suppose to think? You joined a Satanic Nazi group....to espouse that we are sheep? What's next? We are all Gods Children. Now maybe, someone who's been here for years, might be bored enough and deprogramned enough to randomly think this.
It is also funny to me, that the account you are teaming up with, has not been here a year either. There are many people that have been here well over a Decade. 15 years for me...
November just happened for me. It's funny that very rarely the old true usernames come up with such nonsense games. I could make a fake account right now, and 6 months would go by in a flash, and start some kinda Drama.
So why dont you sit back, and in 3 years, will see if you are even relevant. Then when you do something stupid or get banned, it took years to build up some kinda trust that you are even a person. But no, you want to tell us all how we will think. Just a few months in the door.
March 2020, you were not even here. Much less how about when the final RTR came out? Next you will tell me you have been here for years, but new name. Well one anyone can claim that and two, why? What happened to the old name you went by?
Even Don Danko played this game, and I thought I was crazy for thinking certain accounts were him. It's just so easy to see through anymore for everyone.
If you are new, then how about you sit back and try to learn something?
*sighs* you really have a way of making people feel welcome and like family. If I have to give the High Priest a photo of myself and my natal chart just to get ones like you off my back and actually let me be myself around here then I will do so.
Firstly I’m not a dude. Secondly, I came to JoS in September/October 2020, and was too nervous to make an account until November. I was very brainwashed, in a lot of pain, and my social skills were and still are practically zero.
I follow jrvan around because I feel safe with him and I trust him. JoS may be an online forum, but to my mind it’s no different to walking into a room full of strangers and people I don’t know and have never spoken to. Being introverted and a lot of the time asocial, I stay with the ones I’m comfortable with until I can gain some personal confidence. But that really isn’t working out too well because I either get put down or told I don’t exist.
I never said anything about SS being sheep, or that they should be. Neither did jrvan. I was only very literally defending an animal that people commonly think of as dumb.
My first experience here socially was getting called an alternate account all because I didn’t understand what the hang ups were about with generalising men and women. That resulted in drama with SWG because he insulted my partner and I wanted to defend him since SWG didn’t know him or our situation at all. I was still carrying a shit tonne of trauma from people never letting me defend the ones I care about. I hate it when people look down at me and say “go sit over there and let the men work.” I hate being told to be useless and I hate feeling useless. Naturally that hate and trauma bled out into my comments and I lost control of my emotions.
I’m still learning to gain control because I can be explosive and violent whenever things get too much. I remember something HP Maxine said in an article that as you grow in advancement and increase your personal power, negative emotions directed at others can cause misfortune and harm to them. But not letting those emotions out is also bad for yourself too.
jrvan is much more comfortable being social than I am. So he talks more than I do. He also has more knowledge than I do. And when I feel up to it, I go through spouts of talking a lot and not talking at all. I don’t know how to convey my views without it appearing like I’m trying to shove it all down a persons throat, and thanks to HPHC I’m even aware that that’s how it seemed to others. I never intended to come across like that, and I spoke with my Demon last night and he told me ways I can better communicate without getting myself or others hurt over misunderstandings.
I don’t care if you don’t trust me or believe what I say. I don’t expect you too because how can you? I don’t know your face and you don’t know mine. I could spill my whole life here on JoS, and you would never believe me.
Regardless, I say this honestly under Father Satan, this is my one and only account I have ever created for JoS. I have not been here longer than September 2020. I dedicated with my name in blood to Satan and I do cleaning and AoP everyday. I try my best during RTR schedules, I’ve had a few speed wobbles, even crashed sometimes, but I still try.
All I have done for the past few months is “sit back” and learn and meditate. I have taken shit and been slandered at times, but here I am still trying. This entire comment section these last couple days have been nothing but me trying to learn and understand.
I’m not going to be sorry for thinking differently and being different and abnormal. I’m not going to lower my head just because you said so. I’m me, and if you hate that so be it. I will try my best to learn better social skills. I’m here for my people, and Satan. I’m here because I finally found a way to bring justice to those who harm animals, children, and nature, and heal myself from those who hurt me in the past.
At the end of the day this is all meaningless without you being able to see my face though, isn’t it? All anyone can do here is take a person for their word, maybe tap into their energies, and hope they’re not an enemy.
So nothing I say would be “proof” to you that I am a person, a human, someone who doesn’t deserve the treatment you have given me and jrvan today. But that’s not what matters to me.
It’s not you I have to prove myself to at the end of the day. Only Satan.