Satan left me?

[InlovewithSatan]

6-7 years ago I had renounced denounced Satan as I was crying and depressed.
I'm nowhere in life. Thinking coming to Satan has just worsened my life 10x.
Imprisoned in home since last almost a decade.
I feel alien to this human society now and feel like I don't belong to this society.
Imagine a 8 year old kid. I'm just like that mentally. But Add 21 more to that, and I'm that old.

It was all good in the beginning but then everything worsened and I lost 7-8 years of life doing nothing.

I don't feel like continuing living. There's one thing that matters a lot to me and I don't have it. Without it I can't live life to the fullest let alo e living with pride and confidence. It's not love thing but it's just about me.

Even if he didn't leave I don't feel encouraged to continue. The life other people enjoy from 18-29, I have no experience of it.

I can't even talk to someone.

And I haven't even completed bachelor's yet.

Saturn in capricorn in 12th or 10th in home sign I don't remember which house, has made life more worse and it resulted in a wasted decade.

I can commit suicide anytime. No need to tell me consequences of it. I already know a lot.

It won't still matter if he left, what matters is that thing which I don't have which halted the process of my socialiazation.

 

[Hp. Hoodedcobra666]

I don't understand why you heap issues of your socialization of being anti-social and turning yourself into a total NEET to Satan. Nobody told anyone to be anti-social. Satan gives all the tools for spiritual and material success.

You dedicated to Satan [and then renounced him because whatever you didn't want to stop being a full NEET] and clearly did nothing to improve your situation at all not to surmount any obstacles, you were just busy doing chimp-outs and spending all your life in front of some TV, and in the end, for things you did not overcome, you just blame Satan conveniently so that you never face yourself and the decisions you made.

Losing your life happens because of this toxic destructive mentality you have and not because of any external deities.

 

[Ol argedco luciftias]

Satan did not leave you, you left him. He doesn't waste any time on people who don't care and don't try. If you ever cared, he would also care about you.

If you choose to be a Clown, that is not Satan's fault, it is only your own fault.

Dedicating to Satan is like getting a little screwdriver, the simplest easiest tool ever. Then it is your own responsibility to practice with it and become stronger with it. Some people just sit there and never try to do anything, and they are left their whole life just sitting with a dumb little screwdriver. Some people work and practice and get stronger. And by getting stronger, also being able to move up to bigger tools like a drill. Then a soldering iron, then a blowtorch. From a little knife, to a little axe, to a bigger axe, to a sledge hammer and metal wedge, to a hand saw, to a hydraulic log splitter, to a chainsaw. Every time you work hard and practice with one tool, learn how to use it, and become strong with it, you are then able to start learning with a bigger tool. And the whole time becoming a stronger, happier, and more capable person.

Dedicating to Satan, all Satan gives you at first is the little tool. If you want anything better and more powerful, you need to work hard, build up your own ability, and earn it for yourself. Imagine letting a small child try to use a chainsaw, it just wouldn't work because he is not ready for that responsibility yet, but he can be really skilled with it when he grows up.

Each person, each soul, only has the ability to do as much work as they have the strength to do. And the only way to get stronger is to work hard and keep working. Keep pushing that upper limit further on the track. If some worthless person wastes their whole life just sitting there doing nothing, they will never be able to do anything and will always be weak.

Time keeps going, and each person is where they are right now. If they keep just sitting there, they'll be sitting there forever. If they start walking now, they will end up going far, but they first have to start. Like the thing about how the best time to plant a new tree was 100 years ago, but that's not possible, so the next best time to plant it is right now.

 

[Blitzkreig [JG]]

...

If you renounced him, then he likely stopped investing time into you, but at the same time, he understands your situation and that you were not in the best state of mind. He is not spiteful, hateful, or mean, and he understands that your body/spirit and life have or had issues that resulted in you feeling bad and renouncing him. I don't think anyone can really tell you your current relationship with him, but regardless of the current state, surely you can work to improve it.

As for what you should do, the solution is right in front of you. Given your current situation, are you not in more need of Satanic-empowerment than ever? Surely you should begin or continue your spiritual empowerment to better yourself, as you are more in need now than ever.

You said yourself that suicide is not an option, as it doesn't fix anything. Replaying the past does not fix anything either. You have to make up your mind now that you want to get better and begin making steps towards that. Consider reaffirming your support of him through the dedication ritual and begin or continue a program of self-empowerment, starting now.

It is surely unfortunate that you have had social issues, but look around you and notice that a lot of millenials do. Look at Japan, where a large percentage of the population would rather stick to porn and video games instead of creating families. In that sense, you are not alone in your plight. Think of this issue as one unique to these recent generations, just as world wars and bubonic plagues were unique to past generations. Everyone has had their share of problems, but they got through it, and so will you.

Take a good look at yourself and figure out what your socialization issue stems from. Is it due to poor mood and depression, resulting in apathy to socialize? Is it due to social anxiety surrounding meeting other people? You have many tools at your disposal, such as empowering specific chakras, using certain runes, or even hypnosis to aid this. The solution may be easy, or it may not be, but through Satanic empowerment, you can surely fix it.

Do not beat yourself up about stagnating these past years, as it won't help anything. You do not need any prior experience to create new social interactions. What sorts of hobbies, jobs, or school programs do you have? If you have none, what interest you? You will find friends in any of these environments simply by saying "Hi" to the person next to you every day. Do not overestimate your past as some gigantic loss. While it was not ideal, it is also a known phenomenon that people imagine everyone else having a spectacular social life, as compared to their own.

Anyway, good luck to you.

 

[Karnonnos [JG]]

That just sounds like your projection onto the situation. Nothing extremely bad happened did it, you are still typing here. Why didn't you complete your degree?

And what is life people enjoy 18-29 in your opinion? No one is even entitled to this, whatever you imagine this as. It's not like you have some imaginary expiration date marked '29'. People can derive meaning from life even when they are 89.

Better to start living now and cut out the rubbish.

 

[Jack]

So you wanted Daddy Satan to fix your life but he didn't because he breeds Alpha Men not weak beta men who can't step up and take responsibility for their lives ,and now after wasting a decade of doing nothing you came back to whine that you still can't do anything and how your lives a mess because of yourself.

Listen to me very carefully because I'm going to tell you how to solve your problem. Are you ready ?

MAN UP!!! Your not a little kid anymore. Your mother will not take care of you and neither will your father. The Daemons owe you nothing nor does Our Father. You need to accept that everything that you have done in your life is your responsibility. I didn't say everything that happened to you. You cannot change the outside world or what the world throws at you but whatever you do as a reaction to your circumstances, is totally your responsibility.

You need deep cleaning, regular Yoga and Meditation and get on the Money Spells. Complete Bachelors if you can ,but get a functional job that will last in the upcoming economy.

I'll share Brother Stormbloods Fixing your life guide here ,

PHASE 0

For starters, if you have never dabbled in astrology, you should generate a chart drawing. Here is the website referenced on JoS: https://www.astro.com/cgi/chart.cgi?btyp=w2gw&rs=3&usechpref=1

After doing that, look at the drawing and tables, particularly at Neptune. Is it prominent? Is it in your first house? Does it aspect your chart ruler or co-rulers? Does it aspect the Moon, Mercury or Mars?

A prominent Neptune can bring mental fogginess, hide/cloud your nature, your desires and your direction in life. A transiting Neptune that aspects any of the aforementioned planets or is in your first house can easily generate the same feelings of being lost and hopeless.

These energies to be sublimated require a lot of cleaning.

PHASE 1
Things you can do for deep cleaning:

• Vibrate Raum or Suryae in all of your chakra (pineal gland is included here) and your aura (Vishuddhi works here as well: it means "pure" and the SH is hissed like the S in SATANAS and the SH in SHAMMASH, as the "sh" sound of "shake" doesn't exist in Sanskrit);
• Sun square targeting your entire soul or specific parts of it (like your chakra);
• the Raum meditation, especially if followed by the Chariot of Ra;
• Oss/Ur to free your soul from enemy influences (and much more) - this can be used on single chakra, on all chakra, on your aura, generically on your soul or in whatever part you want;
• Sammas meditation aka Azazel's meditation;
• breathing exercises like the Bhastrika;
• the Returning Curses meditation;
• the Final RTR...

These are only a few examples of many methods of deep cleaning that can be used alone or combined.

Don't stress over the amount of vibrations. Do as many as you can do without straining yourself. Vibrations should always be long and extended (without straining) as the power of sound relies on the rechaka (exhalation phase), as all mantra are based on the humming breath (brahmari pranayama). If you can only do 8-9, go for 8-9. Ideally, a minimum of 20-30 is recommended and you get there gradually, if you're not there. If you are at greater numbers, all the better for you but never rush/cut short any vibration. One vibration per breath.

Johnson Akemi also shared a good cleaning guide.


Cleaning out the clutter and the dross allows to see yourself more clearly, so in time you should be able to understand what are your goals in life, what direction to take and so on. The process can be accelerated by meditating with awareness and guidance runes like Dagr and Kaun. They can bring general self-awareness by being vibrated in the soul or aura, or specific awareness related to the rulerships of a certain chakra (or part of the soul) when vibrated in said area. However, the focus in these stage should remain on the cleaning. Kaun and/or Dagr are just extras.

Protection will ensure that your energies remain as clean as possible. Remember that today builds on yesterday, which means that the more you work on something the stronger it'll become and the more you neglect it the weaker it'll become until it atrophies. This applies to everything in life, not just spirituality.

The simple AoP in warring times like this just won't do it. You need more juice to get by. Lydia has prepared an excellent guide with different tools that can be used for protection.


PHASE 2

After you become self-aware, next is pursuing your goal but that isn't as simple as planning them and organising them, as the only way to truly reach them is to create a supporting system that allows you to achieve. In other words, adapting your lifestyle and habits so that you can focus on a certain direction and your goals can bloom. The focus should be on the system, not on the goals, as the goals are manifestations of an effective system, which means that by following your system your needs and goals will be met regardless. This is based on the principle of detachment, the pure version of detachment in the Satanic sense, not the new age garbage. Detachment is about letting go of your goals during daily life and only thinking about them the moment you're doing a working to bring them to life. Constantly worrying about your goals will undermine any working and efforts you're doing to bring them to fruition.

Regarding this practice of building a supporting system, another SS (whose username escapes me) shared a good reading, which is Atomic Habits by James Clear. Both paperback and digital copies are available on the web.

--------

All things said, I hope this brief article will help you improve your life.

Lastly you need to eliminate all of the blame game and take Radical Responsibility for your life. Everything you do is your own responsibility. How you react to your circumstances are your own responsibility. Stop Whining and Start Grinding NOW!!!

Acquire Meditation power now,if you haven't already,
https://web.archive.org/web/20160619225351/http://dawn666blacksun.angelfire.com/Joy_of_Satan_Ministries_Meditation_Program_40_day.pdf

 

[eternal666light]

do the RTR's daily and maybe u will redeem yourself.

 

[Wayofthegods]

6-7 years ago I had renounced denounced Satan as I was crying and depressed.
I'm nowhere in life. Thinking coming to Satan has just worsened my life 10x.
Imprisoned in home since last almost a decade.
I feel alien to this human society now and feel like I don't belong to this society.
Imagine a 8 year old kid. I'm just like that mentally. But Add 21 more to that, and I'm that old.

It was all good in the beginning but then everything worsened and I lost 7-8 years of life doing nothing.

I don't feel like continuing living. There's one thing that matters a lot to me and I don't have it. Without it I can't live life to the fullest let alo e living with pride and confidence. It's not love thing but it's just about me.

Even if he didn't leave I don't feel encouraged to continue. The life other people enjoy from 18-29, I have no experience of it.

I can't even talk to someone.

And I haven't even completed bachelor's yet.

Saturn in capricorn in 12th or 10th in home sign I don't remember which house, has made life more worse and it resulted in a wasted decade.

I can commit suicide anytime. No need to tell me consequences of it. I already know a lot.

It won't still matter if he left, what matters is that thing which I don't have which halted the process of my socialiazation.

I remember you. Because your name was such a dichotomy lol.

So you know, you are not alone my friend. If you have 4 or more retrograde in the chart or the chart ruler is retrograde, you will not come into your own till your thirties. The late bloomer it's called. Then at which point you take off and become way more then most people. Retrogrades are power. Hitler had his venus retrograde, before 30 he sucked as a speaker.

It frustrated the hell out of him. Then by 34, he was one of the best orators in all of History. My life SUCKED up until now.

Now I have healed all the health problems of the past, my mind is healing and with the curses gone, my spirit power returning. Now with munka everything is freeing and able to work.

I have had this charted out in my mind of how this will go, and so far everything is right on schedule. If it continues, then in 2 years from now, I will finally be the person I wanted to be my whole life.

It sucks to wait yes. Believe me I fucking know. Having been waterboarded every single second of everyday for 16 years. I can now breathe and much more then that.

Look at it how it coincides with everything too. The curses being removed. If in 2010 we could have just not suffered. We still would not have been free like we are today.

The stuff that Satan releases next will change EVERYTHING. imagine the next two years. Out of our Saturn Returns. The retrogrades flip forward and work for you.

This is just the beginning! I wont lie to you. I've yelled out at Satan a time or two. I've cursed everything. But I have never left Satans side! Nor has he left MINE!!

A few weeks ago, he said something so Beautiful to me. I said Satan I am sorry, that I cannot change myself overnight. His consciousness came forward and he said. "And I've never asked you too, I have always accepted you just the way you are, from day one that I came for you. I only asked that little by little, step by step you progressed yourself. Making a slight progress everyday, which you have. All my expectations have been met, it is only your absurd ones that trouble you."

I was blown away. Through years I have suffered and struggled, but I have kept loyal. I may have bitched half the way. But I have a hell of a mouth on me.

Like Hitler said in the post I sent, made 7 mistakes? Hell no I counted, I made 767 mistakes! If next year I make a little less, then that's a great progress.

This is from the Solar Aryan Messiah himself! What you have done with your life up until now, no one will judge you for. You were restricted in every way, cursed to oblivion. Your astrology wrecking havoc.

You make the decision TODAY. Who do you want to be? That of someone who stands by the Gods!? Who says to him or herself, regardless of what weaknesses I have, I shall stand regardless!!

I shall with spoken words, claim my loyalty and faith to Satan! That the heavens may crash around me! But to him I shall remain!!

Lord Satan by your grace, I ask you grant me the power to conceive in my mind and execute that which I need to do! That no matter how many times I fall, I will pick myself back up again! It may be a fool who stands for you. But it is a loyal fool who stand till death takes him!!

May YOUR will be done Father Satan!! As a vessel of you, direct me to be of use!!

I will either fall or I will triumph. But on my gravestone they will write. Here lies, that of a fool, a broken fool, one who was not the strongest, or the smartest, but one who till his last dying breath, GAVE HIS SOUL AND HIS LIFE TO SATAN! Now into his embrace did he go.

 

[Invictus]

Whenever I read posts like these, I feel a strong need to provide words of encouragement, even if, ultimately, my time is wasted in the end.

So you wasted over ten years of your life. There's nothing you can do to change that. By wallowing in self-pity, you change nothing, and go nowhere. What matters from now on, is what you do from here on out. How long have you been lurking on the forums? hopefully long enough to understand that humanity is going through a war in which our survival as a species is at stake.

Only you can turn your life around, although you may need help (which you should seek out, especially if your mental state is as screwed as you claim), and it might require getting out of your comfort zone you've clearly enjoyed for the past decade.

As far as your denouncement of Satan... I am not Satan, but if someone denounced their loyalty to me, then later regretted it, and then proved with their actions that they would take things seriously from now on, by maybe doing daily RTRs, finally starting to advance spiritually, going through the JoS website, and progressing like you should have been in the first place, I would accept you back. But again, I am not Satan. I also don't envy you, to say the least.

No one does any good for humanity dead. Only alive can one do anything worthwhile.

 

[InlovewithSatan]

I'm fine now. At the end of the day, had to carry and pick myself up with Satan's Help.

For some time I was confused that it's all my imagination talk in mind...that I'm talking to the walls in mind.

I'll try to solve this problem even if it seems impossible and too late to solve.

 

[InlovewithSatan]

@aldric,@hoodedcobra,
I remember you too all.

My other account got locked!

 

[darkmonkey666]

6-7 years ago I had renounced denounced Satan as I was crying and depressed.
I'm nowhere in life. Thinking coming to Satan has just worsened my life 10x.
Imprisoned in home since last almost a decade.
I feel alien to this human society now and feel like I don't belong to this society.
Imagine a 8 year old kid. I'm just like that mentally. But Add 21 more to that, and I'm that old.

It was all good in the beginning but then everything worsened and I lost 7-8 years of life doing nothing.

I don't feel like continuing living. There's one thing that matters a lot to me and I don't have it. Without it I can't live life to the fullest let alo e living with pride and confidence. It's not love thing but it's just about me.

Even if he didn't leave I don't feel encouraged to continue. The life other people enjoy from 18-29, I have no experience of it.

I can't even talk to someone.

And I haven't even completed bachelor's yet.

Saturn in capricorn in 12th or 10th in home sign I don't remember which house, has made life more worse and it resulted in a wasted decade.

I can commit suicide anytime. No need to tell me consequences of it. I already know a lot.

It won't still matter if he left, what matters is that thing which I don't have which halted the process of my socialiazation.

I remember you. Because your name was such a dichotomy lol.

So you know, you are not alone my friend. If you have 4 or more retrograde in the chart or the chart ruler is retrograde, you will not come into your own till your thirties. The late bloomer it's called. Then at which point you take off and become way more then most people. Retrogrades are power. Hitler had his venus retrograde, before 30 he sucked as a speaker.

It frustrated the hell out of him. Then by 34, he was one of the best orators in all of History. My life SUCKED up until now.

Now I have healed all the health problems of the past, my mind is healing and with the curses gone, my spirit power returning. Now with munka everything is freeing and able to work.

I have had this charted out in my mind of how this will go, and so far everything is right on schedule. If it continues, then in 2 years from now, I will finally be the person I wanted to be my whole life.

It sucks to wait yes. Believe me I fucking know. Having been waterboarded every single second of everyday for 16 years. I can now breathe and much more then that.

Look at it how it coincides with everything too. The curses being removed. If in 2010 we could have just not suffered. We still would not have been free like we are today.

The stuff that Satan releases next will change EVERYTHING. imagine the next two years. Out of our Saturn Returns. The retrogrades flip forward and work for you.

This is just the beginning! I wont lie to you. I've yelled out at Satan a time or two. I've cursed everything. But I have never left Satans side! Nor has he left MINE!!

A few weeks ago, he said something so Beautiful to me. I said Satan I am sorry, that I cannot change myself overnight. His consciousness came forward and he said. "And I've never asked you too, I have always accepted you just the way you are, from day one that I came for you. I only asked that little by little, step by step you progressed yourself. Making a slight progress everyday, which you have. All my expectations have been met, it is only your absurd ones that trouble you."

I was blown away. Through years I have suffered and struggled, but I have kept loyal. I may have bitched half the way. But I have a hell of a mouth on me.

Like Hitler said in the post I sent, made 7 mistakes? Hell no I counted, I made 767 mistakes! If next year I make a little less, then that's a great progress.

This is from the Solar Aryan Messiah himself! What you have done with your life up until now, no one will judge you for. You were restricted in every way, cursed to oblivion. Your astrology wrecking havoc.

You make the decision TODAY. Who do you want to be? That of someone who stands by the Gods!? Who says to him or herself, regardless of what weaknesses I have, I shall stand regardless!!

I shall with spoken words, claim my loyalty and faith to Satan! That the heavens may crash around me! But to him I shall remain!!

Lord Satan by your grace, I ask you grant me the power to conceive in my mind and execute that which I need to do! That no matter how many times I fall, I will pick myself back up again! It may be a fool who stands for you. But it is a loyal fool who stand till death takes him!!

May YOUR will be done Father Satan!! As a vessel of you, direct me to be of use!!

I will either fall or I will triumph. But on my gravestone they will write. Here lies, that of a fool, a broken fool, one who was not the strongest, or the smartest, but one who till his last dying breath, GAVE HIS SOUL AND HIS LIFE TO SATAN! Now into his embrace did he go.

This is interesting I only have one planet retrograde but it is a co ruler of my chart. I had the same experience. At around year 29 of age that is when things started happening. Now I feel more like I am going somewhere in life at age 32. I think you have a point on this because this particular planet is the ruler of the sign my Chart ruler is in and in aspect to it. Also doing the planetary square for this planet when it was direct helped me a lot as well.

But yeah been there done that. Some people though are so desperate for interaction they will wish years later they hadn’t. There are not a lot of good people to chat with or meaningful things to do. If you find one or two people who understand you even if they are not SS you will be fine for now. Just work on advancing. Go with this for now. Slowly go out and find things to do when your able.

You will be fine. Antisocial is not bad often.

I don’t think Satan left you either.