AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
I'm a dedicated Satanist (female) from a Muslim family and as I totally detest the idea of marrying someone they find suitable (a Muslim), the only way to have a love life or sexual life for me is by keeping it a secret.
I'm tired. The lies I had to tell to avoid being disowned or worse -including violence- just to meet this intense need of feeling someone else’s warmth and love are a weight on my shoulders. I'm constantly stressed and can't even enjoy dates and kisses because of guilt and fear of being exposed.
Then my partners (atheists or pagans of some kind) naturally ask for more at some point, to be a part of my life and meet my friends and family. Once, someone started to believe I'm cheating and that's why I don't introduce him to my family.
This has been the case for the last ten years. I decided to ask Father for a demon lover, if he deems me worthy. I believe these unfulfilled needs are real obstacles to my improvement. There were days I did nothing but daydreaming about having sex. When I say “need”, I mean it.
Please share any advice and experience you may have.
I'm tired. The lies I had to tell to avoid being disowned or worse -including violence- just to meet this intense need of feeling someone else’s warmth and love are a weight on my shoulders. I'm constantly stressed and can't even enjoy dates and kisses because of guilt and fear of being exposed.
Then my partners (atheists or pagans of some kind) naturally ask for more at some point, to be a part of my life and meet my friends and family. Once, someone started to believe I'm cheating and that's why I don't introduce him to my family.
This has been the case for the last ten years. I decided to ask Father for a demon lover, if he deems me worthy. I believe these unfulfilled needs are real obstacles to my improvement. There were days I did nothing but daydreaming about having sex. When I say “need”, I mean it.
Please share any advice and experience you may have.