AskSatanOperator
Well-known member
I have been fighting for a year or so with alcohol usage.
I live in a small town and area where it's around me alot, and I do alot of avoiding, but I often drink once or twice a week and have trouble abstaining because of it being around me in town or anywhere I go when I run errands.
It's always cropping up when I go places for whatever reason, and is like a nagging beast always nipping at my heels.
I have no physical addiction symptoms, only mental cravings and it hasn't affected my soul and advancement thankfully, im still as strong as ever, but i get concerned.
I have telepathy and strong psychic senses I've been able to verify are legitimate, that have persisted strongly through this period in my life despite this obstacle.
My kundalini is fully awake, and I have control over the circulation of its energy, and I have no blockages in the chakras when circulating it to the crown and around my soul, yet my body is unable to handle the full extent of its power to perform siddhis as of yet.
My worry is that I could climb much higher then I am, but this issue is always trying to crush me. It's holding me back from my true potential.
I'll have days where my life force is so intense that I feel very capable.
Yet this beast of a craving keeps fucking with me.
Trying to stop me.
I've done workings to stop the cravings, but to no avail. They are very strong and persist often. I fight very hard but I cave and then work to avoid and minimize the issue so I can continue functioning with my work, studying and responsibilities.
It's very circular. I'll make good progress for days and weeks and then fall back into it.
I've struggled for some time and would like to be free as this is not the person i want to be.
I've considered kudzu root but haven't gotten it yet.
Most AA groups around here are worthless and filled with Xian retards and rehab is not an option, as I have far too many responsibilities to just go away for awhile and listen to bullshit, and fortunately the drinking is nowhere near that point to where I'd need rehab.
Just have to stop the cravings. That's all. So I can be free forever.
As of writing this I was fine for a week and then had something occur and I started having a few drinks.
I was making good progress in staying away and weaning myself away from this habit. But the odds weren't in my favor.
Now I'm just very angry and frustrated with this.
The gods have been very patient and tell me to "keep fighting" that I will be "free from this soon" yet I still struggle despite their support when they come to speak to me.
I want to be a better man. For all around me.
I live in a small town and area where it's around me alot, and I do alot of avoiding, but I often drink once or twice a week and have trouble abstaining because of it being around me in town or anywhere I go when I run errands.
It's always cropping up when I go places for whatever reason, and is like a nagging beast always nipping at my heels.
I have no physical addiction symptoms, only mental cravings and it hasn't affected my soul and advancement thankfully, im still as strong as ever, but i get concerned.
I have telepathy and strong psychic senses I've been able to verify are legitimate, that have persisted strongly through this period in my life despite this obstacle.
My kundalini is fully awake, and I have control over the circulation of its energy, and I have no blockages in the chakras when circulating it to the crown and around my soul, yet my body is unable to handle the full extent of its power to perform siddhis as of yet.
My worry is that I could climb much higher then I am, but this issue is always trying to crush me. It's holding me back from my true potential.
I'll have days where my life force is so intense that I feel very capable.
Yet this beast of a craving keeps fucking with me.
Trying to stop me.
I've done workings to stop the cravings, but to no avail. They are very strong and persist often. I fight very hard but I cave and then work to avoid and minimize the issue so I can continue functioning with my work, studying and responsibilities.
It's very circular. I'll make good progress for days and weeks and then fall back into it.
I've struggled for some time and would like to be free as this is not the person i want to be.
I've considered kudzu root but haven't gotten it yet.
Most AA groups around here are worthless and filled with Xian retards and rehab is not an option, as I have far too many responsibilities to just go away for awhile and listen to bullshit, and fortunately the drinking is nowhere near that point to where I'd need rehab.
Just have to stop the cravings. That's all. So I can be free forever.
As of writing this I was fine for a week and then had something occur and I started having a few drinks.
I was making good progress in staying away and weaning myself away from this habit. But the odds weren't in my favor.
Now I'm just very angry and frustrated with this.
The gods have been very patient and tell me to "keep fighting" that I will be "free from this soon" yet I still struggle despite their support when they come to speak to me.
I want to be a better man. For all around me.