My post ended up being really long... It seems I get really talkative with the slightest bit of encouragement. But since you like reading about other SS' development and experience, perhaps you won't mind.
I haven't learned anything about astrological synastry or interpersonal aspects yet, but I do think you're pretty cool for what it's worth!
Hey thank you! I appreciate that very much!
To be clear, I also think you are pretty cool yourself.
I do like you! But I think you should have noticed that by now.
With Synastry, I basically just pretend to be somewhat knowledgeable in this, so I say "Venus/Sun conjoin this" and "Mars/Jupiter opposition that!".
The only planet I have in an earth sign is Neptune, so I had quite the daydreaming problem myself.
Often when I was little I would sit completely still and stare off into the distance lost in thought for up to an hour if no one interrupted me, and I would remember neither anything that happened around me nor what I thought about. I think it's just because school was so boring though. I can focus just fine on things that interest me.
Omg yes I can also relate to that. When I was in school in 9th grade, also just stared off into the forest next to our school. Also this was the time when I felt my 3rd and 2nd eye for the first time.
I am very rocky, but I like it to watch the snow fall. But I don't do it for hours tho.
When I was around 18 years old, Whenever there was a storm with lightning, I would open my window, and climb out of my room (my room is on the 1st floor of our house), and sit on top on our roofing of the terrace.
I love lightning bolts which light up the entire sky. I love the thunder, I love how the air smells and feels.
I remember doing that for a long time, maybe 1hr or so.
My mum got very mad at me because of this, she said that a lightning bolt will strike me if I keep on doing that.
For a weird reason.. a amall part of me wanted, that a lighting striked me in the head... I know this sounds crazy o.o
But then again, it is not very probable that a lightning will strike you soo.... who cares?
Just to emphasise how boring school was, I still got excellent grades despite never paying attention so it wasn't intellectually challenging at all, and didn't get along well with my classmates so it was very lonely. A lot of kids were jealous of me for some reason so they tried to bully me in various ways, but I'd just hit them really hard and then they'd cry. But that didn't really solve much as anyone I got close to got threatened and harassed the moment they got separated from me, so it was very hard to make friends.
I am sorry to hear that you have been lonely for so long. I hope you do have people, who care about you now.
I don't like bullies at all. I hate them. When friends of me start to pick on someone, I always tell them to stop. and when they tell stories of their childhood and how they, literally abused, other kids, I also tell them that this was very wrong, and that this is nothing to be proud of. disgusting. But I do think that this comes with spiritual advancement..
I myself used to be very superficial to be perfectly honest. Of course I have changed by a lot.
Also I find it sad, that we SS are always lonely. people like you have been lonely for a long time.
I never had problems with friends.. But now.. the longer I stay in this path, I lose more and more interest with associating with other people (who or not SS).
I have cut so MANY ties. Many many many many. I do not regret it tho. But still.
By the time I was 8 years old it was me who was looking for bullies on the playground so I could let out some frustration beating them up (don't worry, I only punched them an appropriate amount of times based on whatever they did, so I didn't look like too much of a villain... I think). Then their victim would put in a good word for me with the teacher so I never got expelled despite complaints from the bullies' parents. I still wonder if I was a "hero" or just a bully bully. A superbully?
You have become the very thing you hated the most... when we were children (around 8 years as well), my friend started to beat other children. I always tried to stop him. lol
When I just freshly enrolled in elementary school (I was 6 at that time).. I gave children who didn't have anything to eat, money so they could buy some nice warm pizza
Nobody understood my or why I would give them money, my mom and dad were pissed off by that, and stopped giving me money after that xD
Although your joke is admittedly very funny and made me smile widely, recklessness is no joke...
Hey! it served it's purpose, to make you smile!
That's all I wanted to do by that.
Because of how quickly I was advancing I was mesmerised by "muh siddhis" and thought of myself as some kind of prodigy, not realising that I had not obtained any kind of wisdom or self-control yet, only power. I used my psychic abilities for the most impulsive and retarded things
We are a kind of prodigy, compare us to other people. Do you notice it? We are way stronger, than they ever will be.
Our understanding is way deeper then theirs ever will be. AND!
we are MUCH COOLER!
So cheer up and don't talk you down, or I will have to kick you up again.
Again.. Power is something good. You did not use your powers for impulsive and retarded things, you PRACTICED! I also did the same, but that's why I know what I am cable of doing. I practiced as well
We are occult scientists, we did it all for scientific purposes of course..
and when my serpent grew more active due to all the energy I thought that meant I should rush it to hurry up and rise, which, well, it did. After only 6 months of yoga and meditation.
I was in excruciating pain and pretty fucked up for like half a year, and had to neglect a certain part of my development for a while just to get my energy levels to drop so I could even think straight, and then I just poured as much energy as I safely could into healing my nerves, which fortunately worked. It's only like the past week or so that I've felt comfortable with not holding it back as much and raising my energy levels a bit further, and even now I still have to hold back a lot so my spine doesn't get sore from the heat. I'm just glad I even managed to heal from what happened at all, so I'm a lot more careful nowadays.
That said, you're right. Doubts only get in the way. What's ideal is a realistic understanding. No doubts or overconfidence allowed.
I always thought there was no such thing as overconfidence for me since for most of my life I was good at everything I ever tried to do anyway, but in this path I ended up finding out the hard way that I have to give my body and mind time to adapt, and think critically so I don't misunderstand the situation I'm in and do something stupid.
Yea.. okay I should have readed this first. Why do I feel like that I can see myself there as well?
Thanks for the warning, I will also be a bit more careful.
Good thing that you never gave up. This hard times did not drive you away from this path.. which shows how dedicated you are. I am glad you are doing well now.
You told me once that you are pretty skinny.. maybe you should consider gaining some weight?
Maybe this would help.. But I have no idea, I am not spiritual doctor.
I love doing it in the Sun too! It makes it really easy. Unfortunately it was too misty today though. But I think the mist is nice too! Just not very useful for cleansing.
You know what? I want a SS friend who also meditates consistantly.
I would love to ask him/her just to go outside for a walk of 40mins or something, a day, and just to clean our souls.
This would be great.
If it works for you then that's fine.
As for me... Maybe after another year of consistent meditation and yoga. Maybe two if I want to be on the safe side. Going "all out" at this point would just be stupid of me, as I'm not willing to face the consequences of that again.
I do not mind enduring pain if it's to accomplish my goals. But power without control would lead me nowhere, so the pain would be for nothing. And if I can control it, then there will be no pain. So all I can really do for now is practice and wait. I have to be patient. But I look forward very much to the day I can truly go all out without any negative consequences. Perhaps then my life-long dream (technically a bit longer than that) will come to fruition.
I do believe that you are stronger than I am.. at that moment of course.
Once I as well reach a point where recklessness will do more harm than good, I should also be more careful.
thanks for sharing.
Even if I tell you, you'd probably still say the same... I started meditating back in November 2019 and dedicated a week later. I wasn't active on the forums at first because a friend on a messaging app told me about JoS and recommended meditations to me, so whenever I had any questions I'd just ask him. I was advancing so fast (and showed off to him a lot because I wanted feedback) that he even asked me to be a mediator for him on several occasions despite having been dedicated for years himself. Apparently he was so busy helping others find this path (he's brought thousands to our side) that he didn't have much time to work on himself. I managed to help him pass on his duties to others and find time for himself though.
As for why I joined the forums at the time I did, I realised talking to people claiming to be SS outside of the forums is very dangerous because there's no moderation or feedback from other users. Things like delusions can spread really fast from one person to another when there's no one to correct it, and I realised I'm still new and that there's still much for me to learn, so it's better for me to be in an environment with veterans who actually know what they're talking about. I wanted to talk to people but be able to advance safely without such distractions, so in August I decided to do it on the forums where it's much safer.
As for a cheat code... I was already like this in the earliest past life I remember clearly so far. Maybe I did something to get to this point, I don't know. I don't remember.
Maybe to other people it looks like I'm living life on easy mode, but if that's the case then why was I so lonely when growing up? And why did I have to be in such excruciating pain for months when I found this path? I know the answer was "the church" a century ago and "a jewed up society" nowadays, but still.
Please don't envy me; I want you to pity me. I know I'm very talkative, and I'm very prideful and like to show off, but I've suffered a lot as well. There's things even I can't do yet.
Back when I said something like that 6 years ago, my fellow students looked at me so indignantly. All they ever did was complain that my grades were unfair... But I mean it. I just want people to understand. I don't want to insult anyone, I just want to do my thing. I don't want to have to hide what I'm like just to fit in, but I also don't want people to hate me for it. I want people to like me. What's wrong with that?
Maybe there's no need to get so emotional all of a sudden. It was just a bit of a rough childhood. I hope you understand.
Aww.. *Close and strong hug*
Don't worry, I also get emotional. We are humans afterall. Emotions are real and also we need a vent to let it out. So let is all out. I do understand, no need to worry.
I also found this path, through suffering. Extreme suffering and despair had led me to this place.
I felt like my life was covered by darkness.. So I wanted to dive into the darkness completly, let it swallow me, and become it.. But all I found was light and a shore of love and understanding.
Only because of this, I have found this place, Satan and our Gods.
I think it had to be this way to be honest. What sane person, whose life is perfect, would turn to our side, if they have been heavily brainwashed?
I think, for me at least, it was necessary.
I don't want to pity you, however I want to kick you for those words..
Don't talk yourself down. You are great, believe it, feel it, live it and SHOW IT!
I don't pity you at all, I respect you. And I declare you my eternal rival!
But I wonder where your fire has gone?
It is okay to be emotional, but don't let it drag you down too much.
Your heart beats, you are breathing, you are alive, so fight!
"I don't want to have to hide what I'm like just to fit in, but I also don't want people to hate me for it. I want people to like me. What's wrong with that?"
There is nothing wrong with that. Just stay natural, loyal to your nature.. there will be always people who will like for that and others will envy or even hate you for that. This is always the case. But you can still stand up to those who do you wrong, confront them. I have found that many people can talk behind your back, but once you confront them, in front of everybody, they turn into worms, and all they do is wishy washy bs. They expose themselves for the little shits they really are. and I hate those people.
I do repeat myself, I do like you. So hey that's something! :3
I don't know what people could really learn from me. I think it's clear what people should do anyway: progress.
It doesn't matter where you are now, or where you started. If you want something, then you just have to take a step and progress towards it.
I'm prepared to take a billion steps if that's what it takes to get to where I want to be. If I take one step a second on average, then that's only 32 years. Even if I rest and takes breaks often, as long as I go for a run regularly, I'm sure I can easily reach a billion steps within a century. Pacing yourself is very important too, so that you continue to have the strength to keep going.
Most things will not take nearly as much of an effort. So what are people waiting for? Just do what it takes, and do what you want. Why compare yourself to others when you can just walk straight towards your goal?
Either way, I have things to accomplish, so I can't afford to not keep going strong. There's only one way to go: onwards!
Hey yes! you are right!
This is how it should be! We have a LONG way to go, so we better start walking NOW!
We break our limits, discover new horizons, let our fire and passion explode! amIrighte my eternal rival!?
We rise far beyond this plane and Become protectors of our race and family!
Feel free to send me an email, I actually want to talk to you for a bit!
My adress is in my signature below.
We just don't have to overdo it, so we still get things done.