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My experience with Lord Alastor

WhiteBoar

New member
Joined
Mar 15, 2025
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I used to suffer from asthma and severe anxiety.

During one of my usual "anxiety" mornings i was disoccupied and too anxious to go out and find a job, or to talk to anybodi for that matter. It was a period of time were i was just afraid to make any sort of decision. I was too scared to make mistakes.

After doing Lord Alastors ritual i was even afraid that he would somehow be angry at me. Things turned out to be completely different.

The same day i opened youtube and I felt guided towards a Berserk lore video.
I had always heard many great things about the Berserk manga but i never gave it a chance.

I will avoid serious spoilers.
The thing that caught my attention the most was the difference between Guts and Griffith.
The first one started as an orphan, became a mercenary, made many mistakes, realized that he can be better than that, he forged himself throu living and fightning both inside and outside of himself.

The other "hero" only trained so much, because he really wanted to posses "power" and "admiration".
Therefore he stopped growing as a person and started seeking to use or manipulate other people to give power to himself. He is afraid to face himself and once alone he is hollow.

I had some conversations with Lord Alastor.
He thought me that one should not be afraid to talk and make decisions.
Expecially when young you can make a lot of mistakes. That's fine, as long as you learm from them.

There should not be a time when you start thinking about yourself as "arrived".
Even the greatest man has something yet to learn.
The most important part for me was understanding the importance of actually doing things, without fearing the idea of making mistakes or being threated poorly.

Alright, you got out trying to find a job?
Sure, you might take a lot of doors closed straight to your face. That's fine.
You have met people, you have already opened up some doors.
You don't find anything in your city? Try seeking somewere else.
You end up working in a shitty place?
You have learned better what you like and what you don't. It is experience.

After having gotten some experience i started seeking Runes to better solve the problems that appeared in front of me.
The Runes didn't came to me when i was running from the world. Runes appeared to me once i gave the world a chance. Before they were just "stuff to play with", even if i thought i was taking them seriously.

The same thing goes for astrology.
You can read very accurate things about yourself by loocking at your natal chart.
But do you truly know yourself?
The answer is no. You can stay still all day long conspiring about your "potential".
You can know exatly what your natal chart tells you that your weakneses are. You are still not a man, because you haven't experienced any of them. Therefore you cannot truly experience you evolving from them.

And maybe you do have a lot of potential, but are you really giving yourself a chance by running? This appeared clear to me after a while. Jumping from one extreme to another sometimes is just another way of avoiding the "central" problem, which is the part that hurts the most.

By only reliying on your "potential" you are also alligning yourself to believe that your great destiny will be achieved alone by himself. There's nothind more wrong.
Your own name is a code with different paths leading to a treasure. Astrology bends very well to numerology.
Therefore you cannot understand yourself if you never start going out to your own adventure.

What truly teaches you the most is not directly "meditation", but the path that leads you to it.
You will learn what you truly lack by living.
You will learn to not make the same mistakes by opening up to the world and see how you end up making them.
You learn how to find peace and justice when confronted by reality.
You learn the importance of Runes by giving them a chance to come right for you.

I can make a connection between this and what Druids believed to be a path to spiritual success.
Druids used a magical Alphabeth for divination purposes. That was the Ogham (pronounced Oam).
Every letter of the Oam corresponds to a Tree. Every Tree is the same as both an animal, a number and the energies of a God.

(Following some researches i am finding a strong connection between Runes and each letter of the Ogham. This will be awesome and unique to share.)

Druids knew that by understanding nature you also understand yourself. By understanding yourself you also get closer to the Gods.
Druids believed that the things that you find in a Forest are the same as yourself.
You cannot understand a forest by staying in your secure home.

You need to go out of your own mind and start giving yourself a chance to live and experience. By doing so you are opening up to nature, therefore to numbers, therefore you are no longer 0. You are actually doing something you can learn from.

(Restoring Celtic culture could be a project.
I am living this to another post. I already have around 100 pages written about this.
The point right now is the message.)

Lord Alastor teaches you that you cannot become a man by pretending to be one.
You cannot become experienced by acting like you have experience.
You need to get out of your house and give yourself a chance.
He encourages you to actually do things.

Every mistake that you make will teach you more than hundreds of days were you ignore yourself by pretending to be somebody else, or some non indentifiable thing.

You learn about yourself by living.
You learn to become a man thoru sincere action.
Every little mistake is a step that can make you wiser and bring you to the real effectiveness of meditation.
Living will open your way to spirituality, not the other way around. Spirituality will only help you live better. You cannot inderstand spirituality if you are not living. You cannot help others get close to spirituality if you are not a spiritual person yourself.

Evenctually you will realize that others see you as a leader without you actually seeing yourself as one. Not the other way around.

One of the reasons i truly do respect Cobra as a leader: he aknowledges that he still has things to learn.
He understands the mistakes that we do.
That's because he probably has made at least once that same mistake, and he has learned well.

Therefore i would also take this post to encourage everybodi to stay here in ToZ.
There really is no reason why you should not share things here.
This is a place were you are going to get confronted by wise people.

Do not be afraid of posting things here.
Give this place a chance and try being as sincere as possible.
This place is not your "real life", therefore it should not be taken as a place to hide from it, but i fully believe that there is no place online were you can learn more than here. Also, things written here that are of spiritual value will help many other people.

Hail Lord Alastor,
And a huge thanks to HP Cobra






















The importance of Runes, nunerology and other things like these only becomes clear when you start moving into the world.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Shaitan

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