Hey everyone it's not my first foray into doing MerKaBa but some questions always lead me back to this meditation. Particularly a historical question I posted on pre-shoad'd Yahoo forums before the 2005 shut down. It was never answered. In recent times MerKaBa has been talked about plenty of times with the recent thread of member Shael mentioning H.P. Cobra 2006 sermon on MerKaBa and thought power. Basically doing it substantially decreases the lag time. Also thought amplification and whatnot. I believe it's Sermons on Power volume Pt1 or 2 always forget which sermon it was thanks to Shael for bringing it out.
It's probably been since about October of last year(2018) I stopped doing it was doing it for about closing in on a year maybe longer, give or take. First let me state I have done it years ago at various times and in fact during my 2004, first time period of doing it about sometime during my first high school year. I believe I may have caused an issue which I've been unable to find an answer for, which is why I'm asking for possible information.
First over the course of about 3 days to a week I performed MerKaBa back in about 2004(to the best of my knowledge). For some specific reason this meditation flashed into my mind as "Do it, it's so easy". As you can see my eagerness and my lack of grounded growth kinda caused me to jump ahead and yes to a detriment. Besides MerKaBa I did something else foolish I spun my chakras to the speed of light.
At some point in time this occurred. I was in the bus ride home when all of a sudden I doze off and put my head on the window of the bus. I then imagine without control like a dream snorting a rock of cocaine off a hooker's asshole and I immediately sit up straight laugh and black out falling over to the bench seat. I notice my friend said something I look at him say something he laughs, I laugh and then I freak out and go in my mind "OMG WTF is going on I'm high or something". I then spend the next few hours from about 1:30ish to 3:30is or so returning to normal.
Over the course of several weeks I noticed more incidents like arriving to school high in a stoned manner not unlike when I smoked cannabis and got stoned and felt and saw distortions. It would take till almost the end of my first class to return to normal. I always thought it was the stoner kid on the bus reeking of perfume who gave me a contact high but apparently it was not all this time. I eventually stopped going on the bus because of this thinking, that I was being imbued with contact high. I mean I would open the window and the wind would blow hell other students had the window down. So all that wind blast should negate it.
One time I was at lunch one of my friends offered me his milk I declined it. But the thought that popped into my head was "OMG they are putting LSD in the milk"; sorta like the whole clockwork orange movie. In fact I felt distorted that day almost like I was still coming down from a high.
Now I apologize if these two incidents sound the work of mental illness back then in 2004 I never knew I had any mental illness nor felt any illness whatsoever. I wasn't diagnosed till 2012 with mental crisis. Unfortunately schizophrenia and psychosis.
[1]. My question is "Is it possible for meditation to procure or produce mental illness or a mental disassociation of such nature?"
I'm not blaming the meditations as evil just perhaps I shouldn't have jumped far.
[2]. Also my second question is "Is this the incident my succubus was talking about?" "Did I harm myself using MKB and Chakra Spinning to SoL?"
For those of you who haven't payed attention I posted a contact with entity thread. In fact funny enough I'm not the only one who has been in contact with other entities quite a few threads popped up since in recent times it's the enemies holidays. One member even mentioned[paraphrasing] "There is quite a few contact with entities threads around these days".
I know people might think I'm open to this entity in such a lucid manner but that isn't the case. So this entity who is my succubus spoke an said "Around high school after middle school ironically enough within puberty something happened that put you in the position you are in right now". She went on to state that I internalized a very negative sexual aspect about myself. And before typing this thread up MerKaBa popped into my head after reading one or two MKB threads posted here.(Astrologically speaking my chart is quite sexual so it's a shame that it's not part of my life. Not to sound like satyriasis man but there is a strong mental grip on sexuality. Even leading down to the physical and perhaps above spiritual. Though a very sex-crazed mindset.)
So is it possible to think yourself into negativity. I wish I could express more but Cobra might pop me in the head with a cane stating stop the spiel. So for simplest terms remember I was a very negative person growing up. Some how I still am and to a very bad degree.(Like saying I hate school. Simple normal for everyone but like my father said "Other people have emotions too and your just pumping HATRED into others". They feel it you might not feel a thing but others feel it.) I very commonly state I have no emotions and don't feel anything nor desire or anything. Even though my chart and zodiac are crazy emotional aspects particularly some plutonic pumped aspects. Since Pluto amplifies other planets.
[3]. Is it possible this MerKaBa and Chakra spinning to the speed of light; the fault?
And mind you I never felt anything from MerKaBa if I find out, it was I will be blown away that a simple imagination, simple breathing, simple vibrations, and simple breaths of imaging certain things produces vast results. Because the JoS states MerKaBa is POWERFUL you feel that shit massively internally and externally. But I never felt a drop of power from it.
It's probably been since about October of last year(2018) I stopped doing it was doing it for about closing in on a year maybe longer, give or take. First let me state I have done it years ago at various times and in fact during my 2004, first time period of doing it about sometime during my first high school year. I believe I may have caused an issue which I've been unable to find an answer for, which is why I'm asking for possible information.
First over the course of about 3 days to a week I performed MerKaBa back in about 2004(to the best of my knowledge). For some specific reason this meditation flashed into my mind as "Do it, it's so easy". As you can see my eagerness and my lack of grounded growth kinda caused me to jump ahead and yes to a detriment. Besides MerKaBa I did something else foolish I spun my chakras to the speed of light.
At some point in time this occurred. I was in the bus ride home when all of a sudden I doze off and put my head on the window of the bus. I then imagine without control like a dream snorting a rock of cocaine off a hooker's asshole and I immediately sit up straight laugh and black out falling over to the bench seat. I notice my friend said something I look at him say something he laughs, I laugh and then I freak out and go in my mind "OMG WTF is going on I'm high or something". I then spend the next few hours from about 1:30ish to 3:30is or so returning to normal.
Over the course of several weeks I noticed more incidents like arriving to school high in a stoned manner not unlike when I smoked cannabis and got stoned and felt and saw distortions. It would take till almost the end of my first class to return to normal. I always thought it was the stoner kid on the bus reeking of perfume who gave me a contact high but apparently it was not all this time. I eventually stopped going on the bus because of this thinking, that I was being imbued with contact high. I mean I would open the window and the wind would blow hell other students had the window down. So all that wind blast should negate it.
One time I was at lunch one of my friends offered me his milk I declined it. But the thought that popped into my head was "OMG they are putting LSD in the milk"; sorta like the whole clockwork orange movie. In fact I felt distorted that day almost like I was still coming down from a high.
Now I apologize if these two incidents sound the work of mental illness back then in 2004 I never knew I had any mental illness nor felt any illness whatsoever. I wasn't diagnosed till 2012 with mental crisis. Unfortunately schizophrenia and psychosis.
[1]. My question is "Is it possible for meditation to procure or produce mental illness or a mental disassociation of such nature?"
I'm not blaming the meditations as evil just perhaps I shouldn't have jumped far.
[2]. Also my second question is "Is this the incident my succubus was talking about?" "Did I harm myself using MKB and Chakra Spinning to SoL?"
For those of you who haven't payed attention I posted a contact with entity thread. In fact funny enough I'm not the only one who has been in contact with other entities quite a few threads popped up since in recent times it's the enemies holidays. One member even mentioned[paraphrasing] "There is quite a few contact with entities threads around these days".
I know people might think I'm open to this entity in such a lucid manner but that isn't the case. So this entity who is my succubus spoke an said "Around high school after middle school ironically enough within puberty something happened that put you in the position you are in right now". She went on to state that I internalized a very negative sexual aspect about myself. And before typing this thread up MerKaBa popped into my head after reading one or two MKB threads posted here.(Astrologically speaking my chart is quite sexual so it's a shame that it's not part of my life. Not to sound like satyriasis man but there is a strong mental grip on sexuality. Even leading down to the physical and perhaps above spiritual. Though a very sex-crazed mindset.)
So is it possible to think yourself into negativity. I wish I could express more but Cobra might pop me in the head with a cane stating stop the spiel. So for simplest terms remember I was a very negative person growing up. Some how I still am and to a very bad degree.(Like saying I hate school. Simple normal for everyone but like my father said "Other people have emotions too and your just pumping HATRED into others". They feel it you might not feel a thing but others feel it.) I very commonly state I have no emotions and don't feel anything nor desire or anything. Even though my chart and zodiac are crazy emotional aspects particularly some plutonic pumped aspects. Since Pluto amplifies other planets.
[3]. Is it possible this MerKaBa and Chakra spinning to the speed of light; the fault?
And mind you I never felt anything from MerKaBa if I find out, it was I will be blown away that a simple imagination, simple breathing, simple vibrations, and simple breaths of imaging certain things produces vast results. Because the JoS states MerKaBa is POWERFUL you feel that shit massively internally and externally. But I never felt a drop of power from it.
