How to leave Satan properly

[jenmarth13]

Mods probably won’t approve this message...
I’m prepared and more than deserving of rude comments.


I’m worthless. I’ve asked Satan for an incubus for the last time today. My astral senses are open enough, I go to the gym 5-6 days a week, I’m not a newbie, I’m just worthless down to the soul I guess.

Im lonely and getting older (late 20s) and I just can’t do it anymore. The loneliness is completely unbearable. Despite everything I’ve done for Satan, I can’t even be with one incubus. (I can’t benhappy with other humans)

Because if this, I’ve completely lost the will to live. Satan KNOWS I would do better in a relationship with an incubus, but none accept me. I know it’s pathetic and the world needs RTRs right now. But this is too heavy for me I can’t go on. I’ve been breathing in gray color energy with affirmations of my death to no fucking avail....

If Satan leaves me, I’ll die. When I’m permanently dead, I wont feel lonely anymore (or anything for that matter)
Look, if I was in a relationship I would be hella motivated to preserve my life. Humans need love and affection eventually or they become unhealthy mentally (which is happening to me) it’s painful!

I’ve asked him to leave me and he won’t.. Is there a way to undericate? Do I have to renounce him? Do I just stop meditating/doing warfare?

 

[Shannon1]

No, you will not receive rude comments, at least not from me. If You really truly want to leave deep down to your core, then you more than likely have and will continue to break away from the gods and Satanism. Satan and the gods do not force themselves on anyone. 
Your issues are coming more from selfishness and a lack of understanding on what we have to prioritize and what's going on in the world. There are times when I and some of the clergy do not hear from Satan and the gods right away-- things are that critical and busy for them. 
Of course Satan hears you and if you were psychically open you would get more blatant signs. Trust me on that. The fact of the matter is they communicate with us but many do not listen or are not satisfied with the signs they get. 
Of course humans needs love and care. I get lonely and I wish I had someone to call my own too but you don't see me threatening to leave or getting upset at Satan. There is much more important things going in the world for me to just turn away and  neglect my job. Same for all the dedicated members here. If you were truly dedicated, you would get it...but you don't. 
Also, you talk about wanting to die, finding peace in death, invoking grey energy for your demise...dying will only put you back at square one and you will reincarnated back into life again with the same issues on your soul most likely. 
But you know what, if you have that attitude towards Satan and what's really at stake than we don't need you here and it shows that you were never truly IN IT from the start. 
We need strength and warriors. There is so much that we Satanists have to do to make this world better. I want a relationship with someone too but that can wait. Fighting the enemy is more important. 
And If you truly have been invoking grey energy for your death...just wait and give it time. You'll feel it  but it could be that Satan is still protecting you because he sees that you are being emotionally irrational, not in the best state of mind and you probably have some enemy attacks factoring in too, which is making you feel in an intense way such as this. Even happened to me during times of loneliness, attacks and extremes of emotions--it made me want to leave Satanism and the clergy a couple of times but lo and behold...it was the enemy.
You should be upset at the enemy majorly.
But hey, you can choose to be strong or fail. It's up to you.
If you stop meditating and doing warfare, the enemy has done a great job. But just so you know, you won't be hurting the gods at all. Just yourself. People think that if they threaten to leave Satanism and stop meditating that it's hurting to gods in some way. All that the gods are doing is for US and our livelihoods. 
And all this self loathing and calling yourself worthless just shows how bad things are with you and you are reinforcing all the negativity. If You stop meditating, your energies will get lower and it will get worst.
And just so you know, we think we know what we want all the time but the gods know better. Sometimes having an incubus is not always for anyone and sometimes it really is not the right time.
If you choose to stay, then work on advancing your soul, FREEING your soul with the RTR and becoming a better person until you find someone. 
You really think Satan and the gods are just ignoring you...you must think they are fucked up beings, right?
But anyway, if you truly are serious about leaving. Just leave. Because If you truly wanted to leave, you'd do it and not post and vent on this group which shows you want the attention and desire help. There is nothing wrong with that. 
So I hope this helped you and if you still don't get it, just leave and do not post in the groups again.  Come back when You are in a better state of mind, if you want. 
This is war and there will be casualties.  
One thing that the god Azazel stressed to me is that Satanists who are actively meditating MUST think positive. Our thoughts are stronger than the average...and it will continue to get stronger. 

High Priestess Shannon 

On Tuesday, December 4, 2018, 3:49:59 PM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  Mods probably won’t approve this message...
I’m prepared and more than deserving of rude comments.

I’m worthless. I’ve asked Satan for an incubus for the last time today. My astral senses are open enough, I go to the gym 5-6 days a week, I’m not a newbie, I’m just worthless down to the soul I guess.

Im lonely and getting older (late 20s) and I just can’t do it anymore. The loneliness is completely unbearable. Despite everything I’ve done for Satan, I can’t even be with one incubus. (I can’t benhappy with other humans)

Because if this, I’ve completely lost the will to live. Satan KNOWS I would do better in a relationship with an incubus, but none accept me. I know it’s pathetic and the world needs RTRs right now. But this is too heavy for me I can’t go on. I’ve been breathing in gray color energy with affirmations of my death to no fucking avail....

If Satan leaves me, I’ll die. When I’m permanently dead, I wont feel lonely anymore (or anything for that matter)
Look, if I was in a relationship I would be hella motivated to preserve my life. Humans need love and affection eventually or they become unhealthy mentally (which is happening to me) it’s painful!

I’ve asked him to leave me and he won’t.. Is there a way to undericate? Do I have to renounce him? Do I just stop meditating/doing warfare?

 

[Jeremy M]

 Nice post HPS. 

Sent from my iPhone

On Dec 5, 2018, at 9:46 AM, Shannon soutlaw92@... [JoyofSatan666] <[url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url] wrote:

  No, you will not receive rude comments, at least not from me. If You really truly want to leave deep down to your core, then you more than likely have and will continue to break away from the gods and Satanism. Satan and the gods do not force themselves on anyone. 
Your issues are coming more from selfishness and a lack of understanding on what we have to prioritize and what's going on in the world. There are times when I and some of the clergy do not hear from Satan and the gods right away-- things are that critical and busy for them. 
Of course Satan hears you and if you were psychically open you would get more blatant signs. Trust me on that. The fact of the matter is they communicate with us but many do not listen or are not satisfied with the signs they get. 
Of course humans needs love and care. I get lonely and I wish I had someone to call my own too but you don't see me threatening to leave or getting upset at Satan. There is much more important things going in the world for me to just turn away and  neglect my job. Same for all the dedicated members here. If you were truly dedicated, you would get it...but you don't. 
Also, you talk about wanting to die, finding peace in death, invoking grey energy for your demise...dying will only put you back at square one and you will reincarnated back into life again with the same issues on your soul most likely. 
But you know what, if you have that attitude towards Satan and what's really at stake than we don't need you here and it shows that you were never truly IN IT from the start. 
We need strength and warriors. There is so much that we Satanists have to do to make this world better. I want a relationship with someone too but that can wait. Fighting the enemy is more important. 
And If you truly have been invoking grey energy for your death...just wait and give it time. You'll feel it  but it could be that Satan is still protecting you because he sees that you are being emotionally irrational, not in the best state of mind and you probably have some enemy attacks factoring in too, which is making you feel in an intense way such as this. Even happened to me during times of loneliness, attacks and extremes of emotions--it made me want to leave Satanism and the clergy a couple of times but lo and behold...it was the enemy.
You should be upset at the enemy majorly.
But hey, you can choose to be strong or fail. It's up to you.
If you stop meditating and doing warfare, the enemy has done a great job. But just so you know, you won't be hurting the gods at all. Just yourself. People think that if they threaten to leave Satanism and stop meditating that it's hurting to gods in some way. All that the gods are doing is for US and our livelihoods. 
And all this self loathing and calling yourself worthless just shows how bad things are with you and you are reinforcing all the negativity. If You stop meditating, your energies will get lower and it will get worst.
And just so you know, we think we know what we want all the time but the gods know better. Sometimes having an incubus is not always for anyone and sometimes it really is not the right time.
If you choose to stay, then work on advancing your soul, FREEING your soul with the RTR and becoming a better person until you find someone. 
You really think Satan and the gods are just ignoring you...you must think they are fucked up beings, right?
But anyway, if you truly are serious about leaving. Just leave. Because If you truly wanted to leave, you'd do it and not post and vent on this group which shows you want the attention and desire help. There is nothing wrong with that. 
So I hope this helped you and if you still don't get it, just leave and do not post in the groups again.  Come back when You are in a better state of mind, if you want. 
This is war and there will be casualties.  
One thing that the god Azazel stressed to me is that Satanists who are actively meditating MUST think positive. Our thoughts are stronger than the average...and it will continue to get stronger. 

High Priestess Shannon 
On Tuesday, December 4, 2018, 3:49:59 PM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url] wrote:

  Mods probably won’t approve this message...
I’m prepared and more than deserving of rude comments.

I’m worthless. I’ve asked Satan for an incubus for the last time today. My astral senses are open enough, I go to the gym 5-6 days a week, I’m not a newbie, I’m just worthless down to the soul I guess.

Im lonely and getting older (late 20s) and I just can’t do it anymore. The loneliness is completely unbearable. Despite everything I’ve done for Satan, I can’t even be with one incubus. (I can’t benhappy with other humans)

Because if this, I’ve completely lost the will to live. Satan KNOWS I would do better in a relationship with an incubus, but none accept me. I know it’s pathetic and the world needs RTRs right now. But this is too heavy for me I can’t go on. I’ve been breathing in gray color energy with affirmations of my death to no fucking avail....

If Satan leaves me, I’ll die. When I’m permanently dead, I wont feel lonely anymore (or anything for that matter)
Look, if I was in a relationship I would be hella motivated to preserve my life. Humans need love and affection eventually or they become unhealthy mentally (which is happening to me) it’s painful!

I’ve asked him to leave me and he won’t.. Is there a way to undericate? Do I have to renounce him? Do I just stop meditating/doing warfare?

 

[jenmarth13]

I’ve aready decided what to do. I’ll do copious amounts of warfare to the point the enemy attacked me as badly as last year. The I’ll let them kill me this time. No aura of protections, nothing. Ill go out worthless and unwanted.

Thanks for this great community, it was great to be here when I was still happy.

 

[vahswplhvsc4357o4irdmlulgj4pifhsbojb2jzg]

Dying won't solve anything, it would just create more hang ups and problems.

Try to get rid of hang ups and blockages that are holding you back so much, meditate more and you might just meet your Soul Mate.

 

[diexell4]

Your astral senses cant be that much open, when you
cant interprete signs from the gods. To your affirmation with grey energy, this fcks you much and ist between a much disrespect to your Guardian Daemon. Why you Dont do a positive Affirmation instead. Ok you dont want to live anymore, but of you do suicide you will have much problems in your Next life when you have the permission to reincarnate. This would be the best you can get to reincarnate with problems. The other options would be to get into the soul cube of the reptilians, and if your soul doesnt get distroyed you will be reincarnate as a jewish slave. Just Imagine how they laugh about you, and how they laugh about vamparizing your Energy. Bow down to Jehovah and get a fking slave of the jews them without the possibility to do Actions on your own. If you want this life go and get it SURRENDER. Is this a life worth living or do you want to take ACTION and be the best of yourself. Decide. I Tell you sth life on Earth is the hardest fcking school you can get but you can advance the fastest. Surrendering? Everyone can surrender, are you as this weak? No you arent if you are honestly to yourself! You get no Love? Look at your life! Do you can eat everyday? Do you have a hot meal a day? DO YOU LIVE? YES THIS IS THE LOVE OF SATAN. Be blessful for it. Try to See both sites, Not only the negative. You have the the fcking PRESENT to live in your Body. Do you know how MANY souls wait to reincarnate??? (from Satan, not from the Jews). To ADVANCE and create a world living? And you just whine about getting no love and doing stupid shit. The sad truth is that you are at the end of your 20 and habe this thoughts. But ok it’s just the enemy playing with you, so stop doing dumb shit use your gym attitude and don’t surrender. Learn to enjoy the small things in your life. Its really hard to watch into satan, he is the gods of the gods many actions you can’t understand, but you don’t have to. But keep in mind he does always the best for you and who knows ? Maybe in 2 months you meet the love of your life and will be happy for the rest of your life so this is the reason you wont get one. How do you actually know you haven‘t got an succubus? Me for myself I would say I’m not that advanced but with my imagination when I masturbate and asked satan to contact my succubus that she will come, I feel a huge difference in the orgasmus to when I just masturbate. But again it’s in my opinion because you see to much negative and maybe want only to see the negative aspects of life. I wonder how you even manage to go 5-6 times to the gym with this attitude. But ok everyone has ups and downs in his life grow of your downs, they even make you stronger. Satan loves you, and even if you have no incubus it has his positive reasons. And that I invested so much of my time to write this post should be sign of Satans love enough. I know the truth is hard but letting you fall should be never an option. At the end I want to say once you made an commitment to Satan it’s permanent. Is this a bad thing ? No because Satan is a positive being who try’s to help you in every way. It’s normal that you can’t see all his actions. Smile, and look at your gym progress what you did and how much focus and discipline you showed to yourself. Don’t be down just because probably a thought or a personal theory of yourself with support of the enemy. (Void meditations helps <3).
So be proud of yourself and what gifts you got. You will be find your love partner. But with a negative Attitude YOU wont change anything to the good.
I hope I could help see it as a help and not as sth negative.
May satan be with you!
666 <3

 

[jenmarth13]

Thank you HP. It’s not that I WANT to die per se, but if dying and having my soul dissipate with no chance of reincarnation stops me from being lonely idk what else to do.

I can’t do anything about feeling this way.like using WUNO only numbs the pain, it doesn’t fix the problem. I know the Gods arent ignoring me, and I understand they get busy. That isn’t the problem. I just feel trapped.

I may or may not decide to do a lot of warfare and let myself die in the end or not. I don’t know right now. Even on the days when I would try my best at meditation, things didn’t feel better emotionally. Physically and spiritually they did, but I was still depressed no matter how much I worked on my soul.

I do like meditating, really. And I have been getting obvious signs and being told to stop this nonsense by them too. But I just can’t get over it. Idk how...

I’m not gonna stop warfare irregardless. I did 10 yesterday. Might do more today. But regarding feeling this way, I don’t know how to cope.

 

[clement paulsen]

Depression and suicidal thoughts come from many sources.  However you may feel, you can recover and feel better. 
You owe it to yourself — and you are worthy of love, as you say everyone is — to work out your difficulties. It may seem baffling and impossible, but you can — I PROMISE — to work through these, regardless of your spiritual path. 
I felt the same, but with some help I can say life is better now for me. It can be for you, too. Rule 1 — harm reduction.  Be gentle with yourself — and you should be proud to have made such a difficult attempt at explaining yourself. 
Keep talking, keep thinking. You will feel better. 

On Dec 3, 2018, at 7:31 AM, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url] wrote:
undericate

 

[dypetrod]

Besides what High Priestess Shannon has already stated, which is great advice, I'd also like to add that at least in my opinion, we have to learn to truly love ourselves first, in order to be able to love anyone else. I honestly don't see how you can truly love anyone else if you don't love your own self first and foremost. 
And you may think otherwise, but it really does not depend on anyone else for you to become complete and be proud of yourself. Your own happiness only depends on your own, as much as this may sound "cliché" but it's true, and no one else will really make you "complete" as an individual. if you depended on anyone to "complete" you, it means that you would only be a "half" on your own, and your partner would only be a "half" on his own, too. 
You're not just "half" of a person. A love partner may be good for us when we're ready and may help us feel even happier, but both you and this possible partner are still whole and separate individuals on your own, and your "wholeness" does not depend on anyone else but your self. Same for your own happiness and pride as an individual.

 

[jenmarth13]

Just want to thank everyone. I’ll reconsider these lousy self-destructive actions. It’s just gonna be excruciatingly painful to keep living. I’m told I’ll never be with an incubus anyway... so I’m gonna have to keep living alone I guess. Its possible to literally die of loneliness (it really is) so even if I meditate that might still happen. Who knows.

 

[jar0085]

No one is truly worthless, only the states one thinks that defines them is. You are not your state of mind, and you're more precious than that. I'm having a hard time too and I have been on the fence with doing the official dedication. I believe Enki and the whole host of them are like busy parents in a capacity. Like a loving parent who repeatedly tells their child not to do something bad. They don't leave you because they care and our state of mind makes it where we can't see that. Also, the enemy will interfere in my opinion. Remember, every thought that passes through your mind is not necessarily your own. I'm psychically open a bit and I hear all sorts of voices. I can even hear the thoughts of other humans, albeit uncontrollably, which is kind of funny because my physical appearance shows a lot of self-control and strength, but within I'm totally the opposite it seems. I can be strong and still for a few moments of time within, especially if it's for magic, but even then, it's a challenge. Regardless, don't beat yourself up over it. Maybe there is something wrong with you that needs fixing. Be healthy, care about your own well being first before having another. One can't love another if they don't love themselves first. I'm eerily similar to you in this regard. When I'm with a woman it's like I stop being a boy and become a man, but I'm so fractured on the inside from life and even my own actions that the second the relationship starts going down hill I lose my libido, I can't focus on anything, and all my energy is gone. I even literally get physically stronger when things are going good. I become a better person when with another. Especially if we're sexually active daily or near it, but I think the problem that me and you may share is that we use, not intentionally, other people to become better versions of ourselves and true strength come from you and you alone. Become the better person without the crutch, for a lack of better words. It's like a mage that uses drugs to do magic, he ain't really strong and over time he will get weaker if he ends up relying on it like a crutch.
Never ever, ever, think negatively about yourself. As one progresses they can begin to even influence their environment, in an unseen and indirect way, to some capacity. Even before one gets to that point, their words have power. Don't spiritually hit yourself. Hit the enemy instead who caused things to become the way they have become. God knows everything as far as I'm aware, and perhaps he understands something about you that you might not even believe if it was given to you. Focus on making yourself better and progressing in your meditations. Be on your best behavior and things will fall into place. Maybe there is something you were supposed to do and forgot or as others said, you might not really be ready for one or deep down in the core beneath your character you define yourself with, you may want something else? In my case, I need to change myself in a way I was not expecting. Christian dogma is real despite all communications from the true Gods always being good. But the thing is, my vices and addictions became comfortable because I did them so often they became ordinary and mundane. I'm not trying to implicate you with the same problems I have, but maybe there is something that you might have that's not good for you that could be holding you back? Don't be like me and trying to objectify a lover. Remember, the spirits are real and living. No one likes to be seen as an object and no disrespect here, but you remind me of myself. Like a child throwing a tantrum because they're not getting what they want. Love yourself first and the rest of the puzzle pieces will fall into place when the season is right in my opinion. That's my two cents.

 

[vahswplhvsc4357o4irdmlulgj4pifhsbojb2jzg]

You should stop being so pathetic and actually work on changing yourself, because otherwise, as the HPS mentioned, if you really wanted it, you wouldn't post on here.

 

[[email protected]]

Jenmarth, I actually understand what you're going through. When I was new it was my dream to be with a demoness. I wasn't open or as educated as I am now so the first time I asked I though i actually was with one. Later I found out what I felt was just my own energy. It destroyed me since I thought I was with a demoness for 2 months until the gods finally made me understand I was never with anyone. I also wasn't attracted to regular humans. I though I would be with a demoness so what would be the point? Other than that being with a demoness would motivate me more to meditate and do work. It seemed like the perfect scenario but after I recovered from the first incident, i asked again and again with several months in between and always got denied. It took a while for me to finally break out of that mindset but things just haven't been the same.

I've tried to readjust myself back to people. And even now I'm still recovering from the demoness incident. I've had bad experiences with females in the past, also I'm very picky when it comes to partner since I I've always wanted to things the satanic way. So the "perfect" regular human partner for me would have been another SS or the farthest thing from a Xian. Indeed one time the gods did attract a human sexual partner to me when I was still in my old mindset and I forced myself into the situation. The end result was I took abuse from that person. I'm not sure if she was even aware of how much she hurt me. But I did request something purely sexual not compatible. That was my fault. Sometimes I do find myself regretting not being with her but I cannot blame myself taking everything into consideration. And I did pay the gods back for wasting time and energy.

The time I did have a relationship(online only) I did take more abuse. I did force myself into it because I was desperate. And that just made me resent everything more. Atm I'm still adjusting to everything. But there's a reason why I'm telling you this

When you're locked into a certain mindset, you are blind to everything opposing it. One thing Satanists need to have is an open mind. Especially with messages from the gods. Though I do have my criticism of how things did have to turn out, at the end of the day if I did in fact receive a demoness back then, I'd still have the trauma towards people. I used to say what I wasn't sexually or romantically attracted towards humans. But for non Aryans, the demon/demoness lovers the Asian and black races receive are indeed gentiles who have reached godhood. With Aryans, it's a mix of other Aryans or Nordic. But with Asians and blacks it's strictly gentiles. Along with the fact trauma towards that could indeed effect a relationship. The gods are too powerful to be manipulated by our energy so the easiest route would be to manipulate the sender of the energy. Trauma blinds people. I used to think I wanted a monogamous relationship but now I can't even stand the idea. Whether it's trauma, desired changing or what, the point is when you're in negativity, you see only what the negativity shows you. It's kinda like a drug. The addiction keeps you bound to it. A negative mindset repels a positive one and keeps you bound into it.

You're here suffering as the world moves on. You see you're getting denied but there's a reason for it. In your current state you're not eligible. Whether you need to heal yourself, free your soul, understand the situation more, or worst case scenario you just weren't made for it. But so what if you aren't? It's like sticking a fork in an outlet. It's not supposed to be there and if it goes in you'll get hurt. Just take a step back and keep an open mind. Yes it's lonely and frustrating. I know from experience. But if you don't keep your cool then you'll go into a desperation mode where the desire degrades and changes. The enemy wants that to happen. When I was more broken down they tried to have me be with Jews. Just be careful and don't let the enemy get to you. If you are getting denied that means Satan is definitely there doing something or he knows something. Just ask for answers and do your best to work on healing.

 

[jenmarth13]

I HAVE worked on myself. Over and over again. The thing is it was never enough, I was never good enough despite working hard everyday. I eventually stopped trying. Not the brightest thing to do, I know.

 

[ol ol]

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On Fri, Dec 7, 2018 at 11:36, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666]<[email protected] wrote:   I HAVE worked on myself. Over and over again. The thing is it was never enough, I was never good enough despite working hard everyday. I eventually stopped trying. Not the brightest thing to do, I know.

 

[Shannon1]

"I was never good enough"
Keep up with the self defeating language. I have been meditating for years and I had some issues with advancing faster than I wanted. It doesn't work that way. 
What exactly were your meditation programs? Also, are you doing the RTR consistently? They free the soul and all your hard work in meditating starts to manifest.  You are being too impatient and expecting too much of yourself. 
Advancing is not a rush or competition. 
High Priestess  Shannon 

On Friday, December 7, 2018, 3:56:05 AM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  I HAVE worked on myself. Over and over again. The thing is it was never enough, I was never good enough despite working hard everyday. I eventually stopped trying. Not the brightest thing to do, I know.

 

[Shannon1]

You say that you'll try but yet you keep on with the negative thinking which you have already owned and you're even putting yourself in a negative situation before you even tried.
No one said that you'll never receive a daemon lover. 
You're choice to truly feel alone is yours. I feel alone and get lonely lot but you don't hear me saying that I might die alone, or any of that crap. The problem is you don't know better. You have Satan and the gods and your people here at the JoS. 
Maybe one day you'll get it, I hope so. You're not going to make it or get anywhere with this attitude.  
You better take advantage of what you have. You actually have the opportunity to be on this path and liberate and free your soul and attract things to you in your life. Many will not. 
Don't take the gods and what they offer us for granted. Do not. 
But anyway, good luck on your inner battle. But I tell you this, keep holding on to these negative thoughts...the enemy will take you for a ride. Believe that. 
I guess it's easier for you to do that than to pick yourself up from this pit. 
HPS Shannon

On Friday, December 7, 2018, 12:18:08 AM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  Just want to thank everyone. I’ll reconsider these lousy self-destructive actions. It’s just gonna be excruciatingly painful to keep living. I’m told I’ll never be with an incubus anyway... so I’m gonna have to keep living alone I guess. Its possible to literally die of loneliness (it really is) so even if I meditate that might still happen. Who knows.

 

[jenmarth13]

Aop twice a day 216 vibrations, 1 hour of yoga daily, 40 vibrations on my chakras daily, yes, a whole lot of rtrs (I note how many I do in a journal), and a side working or two for personal things.

I felt great spiritually and physically. But I was always told to try harder and do more. And I was. I would get burnt out very often. Then get scolded for getting burnt out and then was told to try harder. That’s why I say it was never enough.

Thank you for your replies though. It’s not easy getting over this mindset.

 

[fselina211]

From my perspective, you're determining your value based on whether or not you have a relationship. We all have our struggles, we all have difficult situations in life, and we all deal with negativity. Its about how we react to the negativity thats important. Maybe you arent able to have a relationship with a human or incubus because of the negative state you're in. I understand you're lonely, and loneliness is an awful feeling, but you need to learn to enjoy the solidarity and what it offers. Your solidarity not only gives you time to meditate or do warfare uninterrupted, it also gives you time to learn about yourself. To get to the root of your issues with negativity and work through them. Yes, having a relationship is wonderful and you feel wanted and loved, but if you got into a relationship in the mindset you're in, you would only bring the other person down. Youd make them question their worth to you when your mindset either stays the same or deteriorates. Having someone in your life will make you feel better for a bit, but it wont solve your problems. Stop seeing being alone as a burden, and instead as an opportunity to grow within yourself. You say you cant get out of this mindset but you can. I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, bpd, and ptsd at a young age, and the situations in my life constantly have people saying if I didnt have bad luck, Id have no luck at all. But its completely possible to get out of the negativity. Its hard, its definitely a battle, and in doing so, you're forced to recognize your negative attributes, but you can do it. The difference in you doing so, and a regular gentile, is that you have your GD and our wonderful Father Satan to be there for you through it all. To consider leaving him because you arent getting what you want is extremely disrespectful. You need to focus on yourself before focusing on a relationship. Yes, there's a possibility that you may die alone, but you arent truly alone. You have Satan, you have your GD. You have this entire forum who recognizes you as one of our own. Dont be concerned with what you DONT have and be grateful for what you DO have.

Hail Satan

 

[chiakku]

two cents. hope ya not broke-en. catch ya on the flipslyde, kepp reppin whatever faith u got.
plus i got pineapples welcome to it whenever-ervs...

 

[chiakku]

my pineapples = 50 dollars worth/ now y, coz existance counts how to leave properly u cant u exist.
plus cant wait all day for your reply aint got all day u kno bro.

 

[vahswplhvsc4357o4irdmlulgj4pifhsbojb2jzg]

Do void meditation whenever those thoughts come back.

 

[[email protected]]

One thing I wanted to further explain in my earlier reply would be the adjusting or breaking out of that mindset since I was in a very similar situation as you. Again I want to state that for Asians and blacks a demon/demoness lover we receive would be a gentile who has risen into godhood. Aryans can receive other aryans,Nordic, or hybrids of both. But as for the 2 other races it's strictly gentiles. 100% humans. Again I've had very bad experiences with women before being an SS. I wouldn't say I was completely repelled by them and I have heard of succubusses before Satanism and deep down I had an interest in them. Once I found out I had another option outside of regular people, and did some research, it seemed like a demoness was the perfect partner for me. Because it seemed to great to be with them, I didn't want regular people. I did do a lot of work as well. Multiple Rtrs every day, chakra meditation, clairvoyance and clairaudience, AoP, personal affirmations etc. And all that drove me to do that was the hope of being with a demoness. Once I found out I couldn't be with one, I started slipping. Keep in mind it took me about 2 years to finally get a sure answer that I couldn't be with one. That's 2 years of pouring emotion into the dream, 2 years of associating everything great and positive in life with that dream, and 2 years of taking away any emotions towards regular people. It's extremely hard to break out of that cycle. Even now I'm still healing, still feel the pain, still have emotions trapped in my chakras, still have little attraction towards people but now I don't have any attraction towards demonesses. Even if Satan came to me and offered me the chance to be with one I would decline now. Things just aren't the same as they used to be. For personal reasons, I'm not sure if I can be loyal in a relationship, don't know if I would even be fit in an open relationship. My mind associated the idea of being with a partner like that to not be satisfying anymore. and yes that is trauma that makes me feel like that, but I did indeed work hard to get the answer I ended up with. If i didn't pursue the truth Id be even more scarred.

One thing I used to say a lot was that I wasn't attracted to humans. I'm sure everyone can see how that manifested in me. Since I'm not an Aryan, the demoness I would have gotten would be of my race. Now I don't feel attraction towards demonesses. I don't have much attraction towards people either. That was kinda waning from the start, but it's kinda the only option I have to be with anyone if I'm able to be with anyone in my current state. The energy and trauma would ultimately effect you. After the demoness incident, I was in an online relationship. Now I see it was very toxic but back then I was in desperation mode. But what I didn't know was that not liking people made my energy also work towards causing problems in that relationship. Inevitably it would work to keep me alone. Energy is random and can manifest in ways that defies our logic sometimes. I would have never though that one little affirmation could do all of that. And luckily my AoP does help. I'd hate to see what would have happened if I wasn't protected at all.

Humans of any kind, gods or not, are indeed real beings. They aren't a gamble where you should take what you can for the sake of not actually getting what you want. I truly didn't want them, but demonesses were out of the picture. So what exactly could I be with? This lead me to explore some alternatives like removing sexual/romantical urges from myself, creating a thoughtform to have as a sexual partner, attracting a purely sexual partner, etc. All of these failed. The fact I had to do more work to get rid of feelings when If i was with someone they'd just go away kept popping up into my mind, the time I did successfully make t houghtforms they were gone when my gd appeared. Satan had a part in taking them away and idk the exact reason but my energy was extremely negative at the time. I'm assuming they'd just hurt me. And when I was a bit more positive and made one, the fact I had to create something because I couldn't get someone real on my own just kept replaying in my mind. I couldn't be with them since it hurt too much.

Then there were the love workings.. Everyone always told me to attract my own partner. When I actually have in and did some they went wrong. The first one I got that online relationship which was toxic. The second one attracted people of other races. The next one may have attracted a kike.. This is what I don't want to happen to you. I kept doing more work but it all failed. Even to the point of attracting jews. Let me just explain why the energy can actually attract jews.

Consciously I do want to obey Satan's will. If i do want to be with someone, have sex, etc I want to do it, ideally with a SS of my race. If not an SS then the farthest thing from a Xian of my race. But energy is specific. Trauma can effect workings based on the cause of it, in my case it effected my love workings. I wasn't attracted to people, wanted to be with something of my race, wanted love and the opportunity for sex. What came out of it was a kike who was into Asian culture, who had a great deal of interest in me and wanted sex. You don't know how big a kick in the balls that was to me. And keep in mind I would frequently talk to Satan about problems and apologize for past errors and ask him to help me in love workings, all while I did rtrs and meditation, not as frequently though. The energy from trauma can and will effect new relationships from forming with anyone. It even effects workings. I honestly hate seeing how another SS is going through what I went though. That's why I'm letting you know a bit of my story so hopefully you get an idea of what that negativity can do.

The enemy also takes advantage of these feelings too. Numerous times they tried to have me be with Jews, do interracial, etc. Just this week I dodged one kike to find 2 more trying to get close. Once they had me going through racial identity issues they also tried to make a kike seem like an Asian or that Satan did the thing he did with Anton Levay again. Trust me it gets lonely, frustrating, etc. Especially cuz you think you just want something so simple yet you're working your ass off to get greeted by kikes, people of different races, anything and everything that isn't something you can be with in Satanism.

Then what also happened to me was trauma towards sex. And energy did work on that too. Not to get into too detail but let's just say if given the chance I couldn't perform to my fullest extent. But that's just what happens. It starts from one main thing and branches out to everything surrounding the aspect.

Back then I wanted a relationship, I could be loyal, I found it easy to work hard towards goals, I was happy, etc. Now I don't want a relationship, consciously don't want sex(I think it's kinda disgusting even though I know it's healthy, find it kinda hard to do workings since the demoness event. That was pretty much the ultimate working and it failed. And I can't really say I hate life I just find the whole romantic partner situation annoying. I did a complete 180 throughout all of this. And yes I can see trauma has influence. I've been healing and doing work, etc. Things were way worse before. But honestly rn trauma just makes me want to take out these urges and just be alone a lot. It's obviously not healthy. I've been through a long journey of work and failure. I was in the same boat as you. It truly pains me to see you suffering like this.

You have worth. You obviously shown you have potential to be someone great with all the work you do now. I know you aren't really getting a direct answer to get a partner rn. And I know it's hard to keep working when you fail so much. But remember, life is eternal for us. You have the rest of time to be with an incubus in the situation that you're eligible. Sometimes people need to be with other people for certain reasons. It's ok to be with other humans if the urges get a bit too strong. Yes people aren't toys to be used but it's for health. Besides it's not like Satan would scold you for trying to be with other regular people at least for a bit. Satanists of all deserve to be happy. The hardest route isn't a easy route but it's a possible one. My recommendation is try to readjust a bit back to people. If the desires become too much to handle no one will blame you for being with a regular person for a bit. And later when you can find out if you're truly able to be with an incubus and still want to be with one then go for it. Sometimes we need to be emotionally void in life to survive. That's just life. But the answer isn't certain yet for the long run. All we know is atm there is something preventing the relationship that Satan is aware of. Please keep an open mind about this and please be a bit patient. Don't do what I did. I stuck with the dream until the end. Now I have no partner, no attraction towards demonesses, no desire for love etc. Just a bunch of stuck random emotions. But that's what happens.

If you can't find someone in your area to be with if you decide to go with my advice, the working is the only way to get someone. I'm sure you can ask the gods for help with it to make sure it doesn't fail. Just talk it out with Satan. Trust me, if all these corrupted people have relationships, sex, etc I'm sure Satan wouldn't mind helping out his warrior.

I hope this helped in some way.

 

[[email protected]]

Who scolded you? As Fathrr told me; "be strong." This is war time, there are matters far more important than sex... think of our soldiers in battle, do you see them giving up because of lack of sex? We're better than them, we're not soldiers...we're WARRIORS. We fight for a higher cause, and our motherland. Look at our beloved Hitler... he eventually did find love, but only when he was ready. The gods have their reasons why not sending you an incubus. You sound immature and if you look for dating advice, "if you're looking for love or a relationship and feel like you cannot be happy without once....you're not ready."

Sister, dont give up. Sometimes I feel lonely when my demon lover is busy... but I understand that he's a busy man. He's put up with me through but that is love. I'm still learning myself about relationships.

First, you need to love yourself or you'll be unhappy no matter what. I speak from experience.

 

[Shannon1]

As Someone else said, who scolded you?
If you feel spiritually and physically good, you more than likely wouldn't not be feeling down like this. Since the soul and emotions are connected, feeling spiritually well makes for a better and healthier outlook in life. I notice this about me. More calm and in control of my emotions. 
It could be a planetary issue you are experiencing too. Why not do a working or affirmations for your mental outlook. 
Use a Jupiter square for happiness if you have to. That's only 16 days. However if anyone wants quicker effects, do the Jupiter square in one day. Only 136 reps, I believe. 
All that I have written to you still stands. Be strong. 

HPS Shannon 

On Friday, December 7, 2018, 4:01:38 PM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  Aop twice a day 216 vibrations, 1 hour of yoga daily, 40 vibrations on my chakras daily, yes, a whole lot of rtrs (I note how many I do in a journal), and a side working or two for personal things.

I felt great spiritually and physically. But I was always told to try harder and do more. And I was. I would get burnt out very often. Then get scolded for getting burnt out and then was told to try harder. That’s why I say it was never enough.

Thank you for your replies though. It’s not easy getting over this mindset.

 

[seeker.o]

Btw how's doing 10 RTRs a day even possible?!
The full RTR takes around 100 (or more) minutes to do for me, the short version around 30 mins. 30x10=300 = 5h at least!
I don't get that much free time nor the privacy.
It feels like a festival when I get the chance to do it… Hell, I'd like to do it more often.

 

[jenmarth13]

My GD(I think) at the time. I was still in the process of opening my clairaudience points then, so I can’t say 100% sure who it was. But nightly I would hear things like “how dare you” and this one time “who would want YOU??”.

During the day, when I wasn’t doing anything or just thinking to myself, I would hear “pathetic” or “shut up” even if I wasn’t talking to anyone...

Could of been the enemy. But it was when the incubus i was with (at that time) left me and was kinda rude to me from then on. So I don’t know.

It’s not like that anymore though. Now it’s just “there’s nobody” and “no one wants you”..etc which have been getting easier to shrug off.


Either way, thank you HP and everyone for the advice. I’ll take it to heart and do better again.

 

[Shannon1]

If You really think that the gods would would talk to you in that way, you really need a reality check here. It was more than likely the enemy or your own thoughts. 
It's rude and messed up of you to even think the gods would treat you that way and st those things. 
GPS Shannon

On Sunday, December 9, 2018, 3:16:10 AM EST, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  My GD(I think) at the time. I was still in the process of opening my clairaudience points then, so I can’t say 100% sure who it was. But nightly I would hear things like “how dare you” and this one time “who would want YOU??”.

During the day, when I wasn’t doing anything or just thinking to myself, I would hear “pathetic” or “shut up” even if I wasn’t talking to anyone...

Could of been the enemy. But it was when the incubus i was with (at that time) left me and was kinda rude to me from then on. So I don’t know.

It’s not like that anymore though. Now it’s just “there’s nobody” and “no one wants you”..etc which have been getting easier to shrug off.

Either way, thank you HP and everyone for the advice. I’ll take it to heart and do better again.

 

[vahswplhvsc4357o4irdmlulgj4pifhsbojb2jzg]

You only vibrate each word 9 times, if you want to do it 18 times, then consider doing the RTR again 9 tines each, it has been stated by a HP even.

 

[vahswplhvsc4357o4irdmlulgj4pifhsbojb2jzg]

These "thoughts" are NOT of those who are with Father Satan, consider doing a banishing ritual once it starts again and do void meditation.

That Incubus you are talking about that supposedly left you and was rude with you, the TRUE Gods would NEVER do anything that would harm you in any way, only the enemy would do such a thing.

 

[jenmarth13]

??? Why does it take you so long to do one? The final RTR right? Really it just takes me about 20minutes per session.

Either way, it’s neat that you put in so much energy/effort for just one. Must be really powerful

 

[seeker.o]

Hi, jenmath13!
Do you feel any better now? What happened to you since you last posted?
If you feel like it you can talk it out with me, I'll listen.

 

[jenmarth13]

It’s kind of you to check up on me, thank you! I’m ok. No need to worry. I’m still not with an incubus or anything. Still struggling with the thought I’ll be alone forever.

Otherwise, I’m doing ok. Thank you so much, and to everybody here!

 

[Sims336]

Father Satan is the most wonderful being I have ever known. Like it or not, there is some reason you are not getting what you want.
If you want to leave, Father won't try to stop you. But HE is the only true God! Maybe it is your motives? I wanted to learn the truth! I searched my entire life for Father! And He led the way. Something I now understand and see. Yet, for years, I didn't know what all the signs meant. Now, they are clear as a bell. Just to be a Satanist for an incubus or succubus is not a good reason to be a Satanist! Wanting to know the truth and knowing and loving the True God of us all should be one of the primary reasons for coming to Father Satan! Therefore, I do not know for sure, but I think it is because you are not in the right frame of mind, nor do you have the right attitude. Father knows you better than you know yourself. You cannot fool HIM!

This probably won't help. But I speak from the heart.

Hail Satan!

Sims

--------------------------------------------

On Mon, 12/3/18, jenmarth13@... [JoyofSatan666] <[url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url] wrote:

Subject: [JoyofSatan666] How to leave Satan properly
To: [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url]
Date: Monday, December 3, 2018, 4:31 AM


 









Mods probably won’t approve this message...

I’m prepared and more than deserving of rude comments.



I’m worthless. I’ve asked Satan for an incubus for the
last time today. My astral senses are open enough, I go to
the gym 5-6 days a week, I’m not a newbie, I’m just
worthless down to the soul I guess.



Im lonely and getting older (late 20s) and I just can’t do
it anymore. The loneliness is completely unbearable. Despite
everything I’ve done for Satan, I can’t even be with one
incubus. (I can’t benhappy with other humans)



Because if this, I’ve completely lost the will to live.
Satan KNOWS I would do better in a relationship with an
incubus, but none accept me. I know it’s pathetic and the
world needs RTRs right now. But this is too heavy for me I
can’t go on. I’ve been breathing in gray color energy
with affirmations of my death to no fucking avail....



If Satan leaves me, I’ll die. When I’m permanently dead,
I wont feel lonely anymore (or anything for that matter)

Look, if I was in a relationship I would be hella motivated
to preserve my life. Humans need love and affection
eventually or they become unhealthy mentally (which is
happening to me) it’s painful!



I’ve asked him to leave me and he won’t.. Is there a way
to undericate? Do I have to renounce him? Do I just stop
meditating/doing warfare?











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[artanis1]

Kind of late to this conversation, but i must say that i was in same kind of situation like you were Brother, thinking that what If i Will live forever alone.

But you know what? I WONT!! I KNOW that ONE day, i Will get "The Love of My Life" and WHEN that Day comes, i can tell her HOW much i did, to get her. I can tell her HOW much i used The feeling, The "need" to know who she is and Be with her, as My motivation, to become stronger and stronger and STRONGER! How MUCH i used The feeling of her possibly getting in danger and channeling it as a motivation to do More And More And MORE RTRs!
To Make SURE, that she WILL NOT Be harmed!!

A True Warrior of Satan KNOWS how to use ANYTHING as a motivation! A True Warrior of Satan KNOWS how to use EVERY failure as a lesson!

IF you feel like you want to leave Satan, but feel awful about it(like abandoning your loved ones forever), you MUST do like HPS Shannon Said what God Azazel Said to her: Everyone that does meditation MUST think positive.

And when you get Times of loneliness, Times when you THINK that you "Will never get your TRUE Love(as anything less should not Be wanted) And Will always Be alone", you MUST think positive And turn that feeling upside down. Youll MUST think about The Day WHEN you get to meet him/her, you get to tell him/her HOW much you DID because of him/her.

 

[jenmarth13]

It was kind of you to reply. But yes, it’s too late for me. I am beyond saving at this point. I’m 100% convinced Satan should just let me die. It doesn’t matter if I meditate or do warfare. I’ll always be alone.

And for that I’ve developed a deep hatred for him. I am too weak to be here anymore.

 

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Pick yourself up and cleanse your aura do vibration of runes like bjork aulgiz sol you can vibrate these for hours if need be at first to protect yourself. Sounds like the enemy is getting you. Stay strong. The enemy wants those things do you. Dont let them win

 

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Sad to hare that...

 

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No God would want someone that hates Satan. Everyone has given you the advice you need yet you give the loneliness so much power over you. The fact you just affirmed onto yourself you'll always be alone makes it a bit harder for you to get anything now. You need to realize dying does nothing. You'll be the same as you are now. If you really aren't able to be with a incubus, then why would you leave your human partner, the person you're actually supposed to be with, who is willing to love you and be your perfect match, all alone with no one?? No one wants to be with a demon or demoness the way you do unless they think they can gain something from it. In this case you think you'd be better off. If you wouldn't be better off then you wouldn't want them. It's the benefit you want. Not the partner. You say you'd love them and not be dependant, but here you are willing to die unless you be with one. I was probably in a worse situation than you yet I never wanted to die. It took me 2 years to get my answer. Only the answer. It took more time to get rid of the desires, adjust to people again, heal a bit, etc. Even after all that I still don't feel fully attracted to people. I go for any Asian female I can find just to help me readjust but no one wanted me. I need to heal knowing I'll have no one once I'm completely healed so I'm prone to going back into the same negative state. Yet I don't want to die or curse Satan for it.

You need a serious reality check and you need to seriously undo the mindset you have if you ever want to be with anyone in general. This is coming from the guy who was in the same if not a worse situation than you. Do a love working and ask Satan for help to make it successful(after you apologize for everything) and get a partner from that. The focus should be getting someone that's compatible not being with a specific being.

 

[jenmarth13]

I’m not comparable with other people. Emotionally it just wouldn’t work. It’s just one of those things you KNOW. I can’t really describe it in words, so I don’t expect anyone to believe me.

I’m too worthless to be with an incubus too. So I have no choice but to stay alone. And since that’s what’s in store for me, why bother living anymore. I wouldn’t reincarnate after death. I would choose to let my soul dissipate. No point anymore. I’ve had it.