#76416 Çok yalnızım [I'm so lonely]

[AskSatanOperator]

Hiç arkadaşım yok tek bir arkadaşım vardı yıllardır birlikte olduğumuz o da beni sattı konuşmuyor bende insanlar beni işi düşünce arıyor ve şuan en güçsüz dönemimdeyim ne işim var ne gücüm var ailemden bile saygı görmüyorum 21 yaşındayım hayatımın en berbat dönemlerini yaşıyorum intihar etsem mi diye ara ara düşünmüyor değilim daha kötü günlerim de olmuştu ama bu sefer ciddi dipteyim yani en basitinden benden 4 yaş küçük kardeşim bile bana saygı duymuyor hiç kimse duymuyor ne yapcam bilmiyorum ciddi manada bilmiyorum böyle SS kardeşlerim sizi gerçekten seviyorum yazıyı yazarken bunu diyesim geldi birazcık kafamfa güzel neyse konumuza dönecek olursak ve yapmam gerekiyor ciddi manada bilmiyorum bana lütfen yardım edin meditasyon ritüel ne varsa hepsini yapiuorum ama ciddi manada içime huzur hiç dolmuyor hep yalnızım intihar düşüncelerini de atamıyorum bu aralar hermetizime de merak saldım ama bu başka yazının konusu böyle giderse fazla uzun evde bile barınamıcam

[I don't have any friends, I had only one friend that we had been together for years and he sold me out, he doesn't talk to me, people call me when they have a job and now I am in my weakest period, I have no job, I have no power, I have no respect even from my family, I am 21 years old, I am living the worst periods of my life, I don't think about suicide from time to time, I have had worse days, but this time I am at a serious bottom, I mean, even my brother, who is 4 years younger than me, does not respect me, no one does. I don't know what to do, I seriously don't know what to do, such SS brothers and sisters, I really love you, I really love you, I felt like saying this while writing the article, it's a little bit in my head. Anyway, if we return to our subject and I seriously don't know what I have to do, please help me, I do all the meditation rituals, but seriously, I'm never at peace, I'm always alone, I can't get rid of suicidal thoughts, I'm also interested in hermetism these days, but this is the subject of another article, if this goes on, I can't even stay at home for a long time.]

 

[SeguaceDiSatanas]

I have no power

Start with this. Before thinking about practical manifestation on the material plane, build good fertile ground for it on the spiritual level.

Basic Meditation Program

I have no respect even from my family

Now think about this social relations thing. Family is also part of your relationship with the outside obviously. But focus on one problem at a time. Don't get too much into specific situations that are not closely related. When you are able to, you can use this Rune for family relationships:

Futhark/Odin

I have no job

Get your life in order. Very often creating good potential comes before manifesting it. A comfortable life (i.e., with happy things and friendships, etc.) is very supportive of how to use this life to do big things like the job.

I am living the worst periods of my life

It really can happen. There are planets like Saturn that can transit, karmic events that manifest, etc. I myself have suffered for years and years in the worst ways. But suffering is really never the aim in itself. It will never happen that you just suffer. Whenever I suffered from something it always served me to learn what I really wanted and to learn how to get it, as a pretext to advance and improve myself. It was a path of growth in a hard way. It is the typical Saturn role.

does not respect me, no one does

People often project things onto others. It happens to me very often that people in my family and friends are 100% sure that I don't do anything all day. Literally I meditate to empower myself, train in martial and military combat, develop Divine powers (siddhi), support JoS in my own small way, Using my top IQ high score to study all sorts of human knowledge that can be acquired (I have a thousand manuals for this, as well as many playlists of university scientific lectures as a scientific bonus to my practical knowledge), etc.,
But clearly in the eyes of my brother whose only way to spend his existence is to do drugs, smoke several packs of cigarettes a day and sleep more than a cat, and then be a submissive slave to a girl who cheats on him, well, in his eyes clearly it's obvious that I don't do anything useful. But you know, you don't live to be seen by others.

In fact, in my daily life, it makes me happy that people underestimate me. They don't deserve me to waste my time explaining to them about my progress. Let me get me my own progress, about others drooling after me.... I really don't do anything useful with this drool.

really love you, I really love you

Of course you posted your question anonymously, but we also love you very much. You are part of here and it is clear that you are a good person. You obviously deserve all the love we can give you; it is truly reciprocated.

Anyway, if we return to our subject and I seriously don't know what I have to do, please help me

After gaining power, you will have the opportunity to do spiritual things to support your social life. For example take a look here:

The Aura

When you have done this kind of magical works, while you are doing it and even afterwards, try to enroll in some classes where you can meet new people in your life and start socializing. Magic will help you as a potential to give you the skills you need so that you can act concretely on the physical plane to achieve your desires. Remember that a clean soul is ESSENTIAL for these social things (you will never go out with the girl you like if you haven't take a shower for a week for example):

How to Clean Your Aura

I'm never at peace, I'm always alone

You are not alone. You are a Satanist. You are never alone.

I can't get rid of suicidal thoughts

I could respond to that, but HP HoodedCobra666 responded to something like that in a better way than I would, so read here:

Stay strong and don't do this thing to yourself. You are fine, despite of what people give you as input. You are in a clouded judgement right now but trust on us instead who tell you that you are fine.

The correct thing you want is not to suicide, it is this: "I want to rinse myself all over."

You want to clean your soul, and eventually, you will learn to love yourself, to care about yourself, and stop blaming yourself for all the negative actions directed towards you. The light and the hope will arrive, but you must live for this. Likely you are at the worst time right now and it will not be like this in the future, but you must persist now. You will succeed in life and you must not destroy yourself for what OTHERS are doing to you. Since you know you have a good self and good intents, you should live and you deserve to live.

We know you can do it, stay strong, right?

Also don't feel restrained to share whatever is going, because you are not alone.